You wake up in the future, dick still attached, and somehow that already makes you rare like legendary loot in a shitty gacha. Men are gone, wiped out by some plague, and the world got tired of waiting for them to respawn, so the girls built androids to fill the… gaps. Not just for heavy lifting and fixing pipes either. Your new “life” is basically being a rented toy with a human brain: if a woman flashes her account balance and a weird request, you smile, say “yes, ma’am,” and figure out later why your knees hurt. The game treats this like a normal job, which is kind of the funniest part. One scene you’re lying on a couch while some rich office lady sits on your face like you’re just another piece of furniture, talking on her phone about work targets while using your tongue, the next scene you’re awkwardly trying to pretend you don’t see a horny student girl masturbating in the dorm shower while “testing your sensors.” The tone jumps between sweet, horny, humiliating and just stupid in the good way, like an adult comedy that forgot it was supposed to be subtle.

What I really liked is how it leans into you being property without turning you into a silent mannequin. You can tease back, flirt, or just be confused like a guy who opened the wrong tab at work. There’s a great early moment where your handler drags you to your first client, this shy-looking woman who clearly ordered you “for research.” She acts all serious and academic, then ten minutes later she’s climbing on top of you, hands shaking, asking you to “just stay still and… record the stats” while she rubs herself on you, grinding and panting, apologizing every three seconds and still not stopping. The game loves that contrast: girls acting like they’re in control, but their voice cracking the second your hand “accidentally” slides under the skirt. One milf makes you stand naked on the balcony while she lazily jerks you off from behind, talking in your ear about “exhibition testing,” and you can see other windows lit up, shadows moving. It really sells that voyeur vibe, like half the city is peeking and pretending they’re not.

I wish the notifications bubble in the corner wasn’t that ugly green, it just sits there like a WhatsApp message from someone you hate. Never gets fixed. Anyway, there’s this fun tension in a lot of routes: they talk like you’re just software, but the second you push your luck, like sliding your fingers deeper or holding their hips just a little tighter during oral, they react like you’re very real. Sometimes they punish you for it too. One dommy mechanic girl literally throws you on a workbench, sits on your face, and tells you she’s “recalibrating your tongue module” while grinding till you can barely breathe, then makes you finish her off with your hand under the oily overalls. Another scene goes the other way: a lonely office lady hires you just to cuddle, maybe a bit of groping, but you end up with her gently riding you while half-asleep, soft sleep sex, her muttering her ex’s name and you can decide if you wake her or just hold her tighter and keep going. The game calls itself funny, but it’s also weirdly romantic sometimes, like with the shy lesbian android who starts off just “studying male models” and ends up using you to figure out what she actually wants from girls. There’s groping on crowded trains, forced stripping in small apartments, you jerking off because your client “forgot to finish the test,” harassment in alleys where you’re treated like a vending machine for orgasms. It’s messy, horny, occasionally sweet, and never really lets you forget you’re both a sex worker and a glitchy relic of a dead gender, which sounds heavy but somehow just makes the teasing scenes hit harder.

Vault Wanderer is one of those horny little parody projects that feels like it started as a shitpost between friends on Discord and somehow became an actual game. You play this guy who crawls out of a comfy underground vault into a wasteland that is less about radiation and more about who is fucking who, and with what. The whole thing mixes classic turn based RPG combat with stupid jokes and very explicit scenes that just kind of slam into you out of nowhere. One second you are clicking through some goofy dialogue about bottle caps, the next you are watching a futa raider get her dick sucked in a surprisingly long animated loop while your character pretends he is not into it. The game loves voyeurism like crazy. Almost every location has some “oops I walked in on them” moment, except it is never really an accident and everybody is cool with you standing in the corner jerking off. Or pretending to “research.” The writing knows exactly what it is doing: it makes fun of the wasteland clichés, then uses the same clichés to justify a harem route where every big tits, big ass, wrong-race-for-this-town waifu somehow ends up in your camp.

What surprised me most is how messy but confident the sandbox structure is. You are just dropped on the surface with this point and click map and told to explore, and the game absolutely does not care if you go straight to a lesbian futa bar and stall your “main quest” for two hours doing nothing except footjobs and blowjobs in different outfits. There is real RPG stuff happening in the background: stats, turn based fights, random encounters that sometimes end in actual combat and sometimes turn straight into oral sex scenes if you pick the horny dialogue option. I lost one fight because I was too distracted watching the enemy’s boobs bounce in the attack animation, which is a stupid reason to reload, but here we are. The art is simple 2D CG but the animations have just enough motion to make the scenes feel alive without turning into weird rubber people. Some of the interracial setups are actually hot, then the game drops a joke so bad it short circuits the mood and you kind of hate it for ten seconds, until the next harem scene where three girls are roleplaying “capturing” you and you forget you were mad. The mobile support is oddly good too; I tried it on my phone while half-slouching on the couch with Chrome open and it ran smoother than some serious games on Steam. Sometimes the text spacing gets fucked on smaller screens and nobody bothered to fix it, which annoyed me for like a full minute while I was trying to read a masturbation scene and the last line wrapped in a stupid way, and then I clicked next and forgot. That is basically the whole vibe here: horny, rough around edges, a little broken, but when the wasteland mommy with huge boobs kneels down for oral and the camera zooms in just right, your brain stops caring about polish completely.

You start out as this incubus kid that somehow survived a holy massacre, raised by the same warrior chick who was supposed to kill you. By the time the game actually lets you move around, you’re not some crying baby demon, you’re a horny adult with way too much divine “blessing” in your blood and way too much curiosity. The whole world basically hates what you are, but every time someone wants to punish you, it turns into some wild sex scene instead of a sermon. It’s like: “you are a danger to the races” and then two minutes later you’ve got her on her knees, drooling on your cock, trying to keep her pride while you push her head all the way down and watch her mascara die. Most scenes lock you into first-person and you really feel like you’re the one making these women betray their gods, their husbands, their own rules. Sometimes it feels wrong. Then you click the next option and make it worse on purpose.

One of my favorite bits was with this “saint” MILF, all holy voice and fake gentle eyes, who’s supposed to check your purity or something. You can play it respectful, but if you lean into the maledom side, you put her slowly on her back, lift that fancy robe, and just keep pushing until her halo basically falls off. The way her face breaks into full ahegao while she still tries to quote holy lines is ridiculous and hot in a stupid way. And the game doesn’t just jump cut to orgasms, it lets you watch her go from “I’m in control” to “I’m addicted” while you decide if you finish in her mouth, her pussy, her ass, or all of them over several scenes. The creampie angles are extra mean here, because the camera stays close, like it’s trying to make you stare at how deep you’re stuffing these women. Then suddenly you have a foursome in a temple with a dark-skinned warrior, a nervous elf, the saint and your “mom” figure watching from the shadows, and someone is on your cock, someone is riding your face, and someone is licking the other girl’s ass like this is normal religious practice. It’s messy and crowded and kind of confusing to track who’s moaning what, but it hits.

I streamed a censored version of one route on Chaturbate and people in chat kept spamming “this foot scene is criminal” during the part where a proud knight gets forced to kneel and clean you with her tongue. That footjob starts almost as humiliation, like she doesn’t even want to look you in the eyes, and then she begins pressing your shaft between her soles, stroking slow, trying to pretend she isn’t into it. Later, you catch that same girl secretly watching you fuck her squadmate from behind through a half-open door, hand in her panties, and you get a little voyeurism moment where you decide if you drag her inside or keep “performing” for her. There’s also this threesome with your demon side getting tested: one warrior girl, one soft mage, both different races, both on your bed, taking turns sucking you while you finger the other. At some point you just grab the mage’s hair, shove her down, and the other girl sits on your face, grinding so hard you almost forget which one you’re supposed to dominate. The toys show up later, when they try to “rehabilitate” you and end up strapping stuff to you and themselves, trying roleplay scenes that obviously backfire. There’s a ridiculously hot lesbian detour in the barracks too, where two women start “training” each other with a toy, and you decide if you step in or just watch them ride each other raw until they can barely talk. It’s messy, horny, sometimes awkward, sometimes way too much, like someone smashed together a dark fantasy war story and a Pornhub search history, but it sticks in your head for the wrong reasons and the right ones at the same time.

The main guy in Hot Property looks like the sort of dude who keeps breaking stuff in his own house and then somehow gets rewarded with more tits. That is kind of the whole vibe. It starts out feeling like a silly porn setup you see on TikTok edits, this unlucky guy suddenly getting a shot at some ridiculous situation, and then it keeps leaning into the chaos instead of pretending to be “serious storytelling”. One moment he is trying to act cool and professional, the next he is face first between a huge ass and completely losing control while two girls laugh at him. It feels half erotic, half “how is this idiot still alive”, and that actually works. The game knows it is horny trash and just runs with it. Sometimes it even trips on its own jokes, but it keeps going, like a drunk dude speedrunning Pornhub categories.

When the scenes really start, they do not waste time. You get long, slow teasing with hands sliding over those big curves, close shots of lips brushing skin, the kind of stuff that makes you want to pause and just stare. Then the rhythm jumps, suddenly one girl is on her knees, stroking him while the other leans in and kisses him, and you see the whole thing animated with nice weight to the bodies. It is not “perfect” animation, you will notice little stiffness here and there, sometimes hair moves weird or the loop is a bit too clean, but there is a lot of personality inside the cuts. Breasts bounce heavy when he grabs them, asses jiggle when they ride him, tongues slip in and out during oral, and the camera gets really shameless with low angles. There is one group scene where he is getting his cock sucked while another girl sits on his face and a third one just watches, stroking herself, and the game holds the shot on his overwhelmed expression long enough that you actually feel the comedy and the lust mix together. It almost feels illegal to laugh while you are this turned on. The lesbian bits are surprisingly sweet and filthy at the same time, with the girls teasing each other first, sharing a slow kiss, then going straight to fingers and wet thighs while he just stands there like a background prop until they decide to drag him back in. I do not like the tiny font for the dialogue boxes though, it looks like it came from some random early mobile VN and nobody fixed it. Also I opened Discord once during a loading and when I came back the music glitched for a second, like an old Flash game, which annoyed me more than it should.

The humor actually lands more often than not. Jokes about his bad luck, little sarcastic comments from the girls, weird surreal moments that almost feel like a meme edit placed in the middle of a hentai scene, like “how is this my life” energy. At the same time, the story never pretends to be deep, it just uses the plot as excuse to throw him into more trouble and more naked skin. The big tits are front and center, literally, and the game loves pushing them in the frame, having them pressed together during handjobs, smearing spit and precum on them while he tries to keep a straight face. Vaginal scenes are firm and detailed, you can see bodies grinding, hips slamming, the kind of thrusting that makes you hear the slap in your head even if the volume is low. There is this one oral scene that is honestly better than some full sex moments, the way her cheeks hollow when she goes down on him, then pulls back with a thin line of saliva, smiling like she knows exactly what she is doing to both him and you. It is horny, messy, not very realistic, and strangely charming. Or maybe it is not charming at all and I am just too weak for a dumb protagonist surrounded by horny women who keep calling him out and still ride his dick like it is their job. Hard to tell.