I don't know who decided the sperm bank needed a handjob machine with a leaderboard but honestly, that's the kind of chaotic energy I respect.

The whole premise is so goddamn stupid in the best way. You're just sitting there furiously wiggling your mouse over this hentai image while a machine does the work, trying to get your count as high as possible. My wrist actually hurt after the third level. Not from what you think, get your mind out of the gutter, just from the aggressive circular motions like I'm trying to summon a demon through my deskmat. The cumshot meter fills up and you move on, simple as that. The arcade scoring system is surprisingly addictive even though the graphics look like someone drew them during a lunch break and never went back to clean up the lines. Which I think is the point? Maybe?

There's this one moment on level four where the machine kicks into overdrive and the whole screen gets kind of ridiculous with the animations. I won't spoil it but I definitely screenshotted that mess to drop in the NSFW channel later. The humor is so deadpan that I can't tell if it's intentional or just a happy accident of translation jank. Either way, it works. I wish there was more variety in the backgrounds though, staring at that same sterile clinic wall gets old fast. But then again, are you really here for the interior design? No.

The points system could use some tweaking because honestly I cheesed it by just making tiny fast circles instead of the full range they probably expected. Don't tell the dev. Actually do, I want more levels with different machines. The hentai art style is that classic slightly-off proportion thing that somehow makes it funnier when the handjob machine goes absolutely ham. My discord server is gonna meme this to death and I'm here for it.