I remember this one scene where you're supposed to get intel from Megan and the game is like okay seduce her. But the dialog options are so weirdly translated, something like "you have nice... body structure" and I laughed so hard I almost closed the tab. But I didn't. Because honestly the redhead's tits are ridiculous. Like physics don't apply to them at all, they just sort of float there, defying god and gravity, and somehow that's exactly what kept me clicking. The whole spy premise is just an excuse obviously. Agent S needs to stop some chemical attack, sure, whatever, but the gadgets you get are just... a lipstick? I think there was a pen that did something? I clicked it and nothing happened. Maybe I missed a step. The quest structure is basically talk to person, then talk to other person, then the seduction minigame which is just picking the right body part to compliment. I failed it twice because apparently Megan doesn't like when you mention her eyes, she wants you to notice her chest. Which, fair enough, that's the whole point of the game I guess.

The art is unpolished in that specific way early Flash games were, where the proportions are all wrong but it loops back around to being charming. Agent S has this vacant expression the entire time, even during the sex scenes, which are animated with like three frames total. There's a moment where she's supposed to look determined but she just looks mildly constipated. I don't know why I'm still thinking about it. The terrorist guy, Ahmed, shows up once and his dialogue is so generic I forgot his name until I read the description again just now. You never actually fight anyone, which I wish the game had. Just one punch. But no, it's all seduction and clicking through text boxes that sometimes don't make sense.

I left the game running while I went to make coffee and when I came back Agent S was just standing there, staring at me, and I felt weirdly judged. Like she knew I wasn't taking her mission seriously. The sound effects are stock library noises, a door creak that I've heard in six other games, and the moaning is just... someone recorded it in their bathroom probably. Still. I finished it. I don't know why.