Oh look, another card game with tits attached. Except this one has Andie, who honestly sounds like she’s half asleep reading her lines. The voice acting is this weird monotone thing where she says “hit me” like she’s ordering a disappointing sandwich. I’m a voice acting enthusiast, I notice these things, and her performance has the energy of someone who recorded it at 11PM after three glasses of wine and just wanted to go to bed. Yet somehow it loops in my head now. “Hit me.” Christ.

The game is blackjack. Standard rules, you know the deal. Place bets, get cards, don’t bust. Every time you win a round, Andie loses a piece of clothing. Her tits are massive, the kind of physics-defying hentai proportions where you wonder if her spine has union representation. When they finally come out it’s almost aggressive, like they were waiting to attack. The sex scene that follows is rough, the animation kind of jerky and repetitive, but there’s this one moment where the rhythm actually lines up with the sound and it’s briefly, accidentally hot. Then it loops awkwardly and the moment dies.

You know what bothers me? The card dealing sound. It’s too crisp. Like someone crinkling a bag of chips right into a sensitive microphone. I kept turning my volume down during the actual game parts, then back up for the stripping, then down again. A whole workout for my fingers. The game doesn’t remember your bet amount between rounds either, which is a tiny thing but it annoyed me every single time.

The art style goes for that glossy, over-shaded hentai look where everything’s a bit too shiny. Andie’s skin has more highlights than a car commercial. But when the rough sex starts, the expressions actually work, this mix of exaggerated ahegao and something almost believable. Almost. Then she says “hit me” again and I’m back in the sandwich shop.