Lara Kroft is back and honestly, the "big boobs" tag is doing a lot of heavy lifting here, literally. The whole thing looks like someone drew it in MS Paint during a particularly horny lunch break. The proportions are so wildly off that her spine should have snapped three tombs ago. I love it. The animation is janky in a way that loops weirdly, like her chest has its own gravitational pull separate from the rest of her body. It’s not trying to be a AAA title, it’s a flash game from the era where shading was just a suggestion.

The setup is you help her steal some sun crystal from a Maya temple, which is just a series of clicking on vaguely brown blocks until a puzzle solves itself. I got stuck for a solid five minutes because I didn’t realize a specific pixel was a button, not just dirt. The payoff is a 3 on 1 scene that feels less like a reward and more like an ambush. Three guys just sort of materialize. There’s no negotiation, no flirting, just a sudden gangbang that starts with the same abrupt energy as a pop-up ad. The sound design, if you can call it that, is a single wet slapping noise on repeat that made me think my laptop was dying. I kept playing anyway.

The weirdest part is how the game forgets it’s supposed to be about a tomb raider. After the first minute, the temple setting is just a backdrop. You could replace it with a dentist’s office and nothing would change. I wish there was more of that cheesy adventure vibe before the clothes come off. But then the sex scene has this one frame where Lara’s expression is just pure, dead eyed boredom, and it’s the funniest thing I’ve seen all week. It’s a mess. A glorious, horny mess that knows exactly what it is.

The whole thing runs on a weird logic that I can't stop thinking about. Shaundi runs a radio contest called "I Wanna Sleep With Shaundi" and then acts surprised when someone actually wins. Like, what did she expect? The setup is so stupid it circles back to being funny. You show up at her studio, contract in hand, basically threatening legal action if she doesn't put out. It's the most Saints Row thing possible, turning a radio bit into a contractual obligation for sex. The dialogue is terrible in that specific way where you can tell someone wrote it at 4 AM while laughing.

The undressing mechanic is clunky as hell. You click on her clothes and they just sort of vanish in stages. No animation, no reaction from her, just poof, dress gone. I spent way too long trying to figure out if there was a specific order I needed to follow. There isn't. You just click until she's naked and then the actual scene starts. The xray view kicks in during penetration which is a nice touch I guess, showing the internal action like some kind of medical diagram gone wrong. The creampie finish is exactly what you'd expect, no surprises there.

The art style is rough. Not in a charming indie way, more like someone traced over screenshots and then gave up halfway through. Shaundi's face looks almost right from certain angles and completely wrong from others. Her body proportions shift between scenes. The big cock model looks like it was imported from a completely different game. But honestly? The jank kind of works for a porn parody. It feels like a Newgrounds flash game from 2007 that somehow survived into the modern era. The whole thing has this unapologetic trash energy that I weirdly respect. Three on one action shows up at some point though I'm still not sure who the other two people are supposed to be. Random dudes from the studio maybe? The game doesn't explain and I don't think it cares.

The thing about AneJiru Juice 2 is it knows exactly what it is and doesn't pretend otherwise. Reiko's back, those massive tits somehow defying every law of physics I've ever seen, and there's this scrawny dude who looks like he'd blow away in a strong wind but apparently has unlimited stamina. The bus scene early on caught me off guard, not because of what happens but because of how deliberately rough the whole thing looks. Like someone animated it on a laptop from 2005 and said "yeah, good enough."

And honestly? It kind of works for this one. The jank adds something. When Nurse Joy shows up, I actually laughed because the outfit is so transparently a costume but nobody in the scene acknowledges it. Three on one action that feels less like choreography and more like someone's fever dream after watching too much hentai in one sitting. The torture tag had me expecting something darker but it's more... enthusiastic roughness? If that makes sense. Which it doesn't.

I keep thinking about the anejiru juice itself, the whole premise is ridiculous but the movie commits to it completely. There's a moment where Reiko's expression shifts and for half a second the animation actually lands, and then immediately cuts to something so awkwardly framed I couldn't stop grinning. The directed scenes try to have a plot, I think, but who's paying attention to that? The sound design is what got me, actually, some of the wet noises are mixed way too loud and it circles back around to being perfect. Not polished, never tries to be, and I respect that more than I should.

That locker room tile texture is doing a lot of heavy lifting for a scene that lasts maybe four minutes. You pick between licking, sucking, stroking, and then he finishes on her face. The whole thing loops. I sat there clicking through the options like I was flipping channels on a TV with three stations and two of them are static.

The animation is... there. Cheerleader bobs her head, the black guy's dick disappears into her mouth, cumshot happens. George would probably say the proportions are off but honestly when a girl's lips stretch around something that size, realism isn't the point. The 3 on 1 tag means three dudes one girl but I only saw one guy the whole time. Maybe the other two are waiting outside the locker room or something. Who knows.

The sex tape angle is weird too because there's no camera UI or recording indicator. You're just watching a loop with a dropdown menu. Directed? Sure, if "directed" means someone picked which hole gets attention first. I kept expecting a second position or a different angle but nah. Same shot, same cheerleader, same wet sounds.

The cumshot is decent. Lands on her chin and cheek, drips down onto her uniform. She keeps her eyes open the whole time which is either hot or unsettling depending on your mood. I liked the tongue option best because she actually looks up at him while doing it. That's the one moment where the animation feels intentional instead of just mechanical.

This is for people who want exactly one scenario and nothing else. No build up, no dialogue, no variation in pacing. Just a cheerleader and a big black cock in a locker room. If that's your kink, it's fine. If you want anything resembling a game, keep scrolling.

This one's got that weird polygonal sheen like someone forgot to turn off the bloom on a PS2 game. Diva Mizuki, she's back with those absolutely ridiculous physics-defying chest balloons. You know the type, where one slight movement sends them into a jello earthquake that would break a real spine. The setup is simple, three dudes, one impossibly proportioned woman, and a boxing ring. Why a boxing ring? No clue. The ropes don't even jiggle when she's bent over them getting absolutely railed from both ends. It's like the devs spent 90% of the budget on the jiggle mechanics for her body and forgot the environment exists.

The audio is a war crime. Genuinely. It's this tinny, looping moan track that sounds like a cat stuck in a washing machine. I had to mute it after thirty seconds because it was killing the vibe harder than a cold shower. But the visual chaos? That's where the accidental genius creeps in. There's a moment where the camera clips straight through a dude's torso and you're just staring at a floating, disembodied pelvis going to town. It's so jarring it loops back around to being hilarious. Pure, uncut cursed content.

The torture tag is there but it's more like... enthusiastic inconvenience? She gets tossed around, all holes filled in that exaggerated hentai logic where anatomy is just a suggestion. The humor is completely unintentional, which makes it better. I spent more time laughing at the dead-eyed expressions on the guys than actually focusing on the action. The diva's face is frozen in this permanent 'meh' expression, like she's mentally calculating her grocery list while getting triple-teamed. It's a broken, janky mess that somehow captures the raw id of a bad hentai OVA from the early 2000s. Not sexy, but definitely an experience.

The test paper comes back with a big red F, and she knows exactly what that means. This asian teacher's pet fantasy starts with a simple mechanic: you drag the grade up or down and watch her reaction shift from pouty to pleading. The whole thing runs in browser, no setup, just click and she starts unbuttoning that tight blouse.

The 3 on 1 tag is where it gets messy. Once the pleasure meter fills, you're not alone anymore. Two other dudes show up and suddenly it's a gangbang with this big titted asian chick who was supposedly a bad student. The animation loops are basic but they get the job done, her tits bounce like they're trying to escape her bra. There's this one moment where she's on her knees and the camera angle shifts just enough to make you forget it's the same three positions recycled.

I don't know why I keep coming back to this one. Maybe it's the way she moans when you correct her test score, like getting an A is the same as getting railed. The hard sex scenes are exactly what you'd expect from a browser porn game, nothing fancy but the mrs tag makes sense if you squint, she's got that mature student vibe going on.

The pleasure indicator is too easy to max out honestly. You can finish the whole thing in five minutes if you know what you're doing. Then again that's kind of the point, right? Quick session between work emails. My boss walked by once and I alt tabbed so fast I nearly broke my keyboard. Worth it.

The whole thing feels like someone found a half finished animation project and just... shipped it. That's not necessarily bad, by the way. The roughness has this weird charm, like watching a sketch instead of a polished painting. You get this ebony girl and a guy, and the entire loop is basically three positions, maybe four if you squint. The undress mechanic is so basic it's almost funny, just click and clothes vanish. Poof. No buildup, no tease, just instant nudity like a magic trick.

But the proportions, holy shit. Her chest is absolutely ridiculous. We're talking beach ball territory, the kind of physics defying size that makes you laugh and then feel slightly concerned about spinal health. The guy's hands, when they grab her, look massive in comparison, like he's holding a couple of overfilled water balloons. It's so exaggerated that it loops back around to being kind of hot in that specific, brain off hentai way. The actual thrusting animation is stiff, though. There's a disconnect between the motion and the impact, like they're not quite synced up. The audio is just one repeated wet slapping sound that gets annoying faster than it should. I ended up muting it.

Why do these games always make the guy completely silent? He's just a prop, a big black cock with a body attached. It works for the fantasy, I guess, but it makes the whole scene feel a bit hollow. The girl's reactions are minimal too, just a looped facial expression that doesn't change. You're not discovering anything here, despite what the tags say. It's a single scene you can exhaust in under a minute. For what it is, a quick, unpolished visual with a very specific aesthetic, it delivers exactly that and nothing more. The lighting is weirdly flat, making everything look like plastic, which somehow adds to the whole unpolished charm I mentioned. Or maybe it's just bad lighting. I can't decide.

Aiden is a photographer. Not a very good one, apparently, because he's sitting at a poker table losing money he doesn't have. The loan shark situation is real bad. What follows is this weird scramble where you're clicking through dialogue trees and trying to figure out how to not get your legs broken, and somehow the solution always involves getting your dick out.

The sex is the point, obviously. Three on one scenes with models. The models have that particular look, you know the one, where the skin is too shiny and the animations loop like a broken GIF. But the game knows what it is. You pick a dialogue option, the clothes come off, and then you're watching these polygonal bodies mash together while the camera spins around like it's also lost a lot of money and is panicking. There's a gambling mechanic too, I think? You can win or lose money at cards, which changes which ending you get. I lost on purpose once just to see what happens and the game basically called me an idiot and showed me a game over screen with no sex. Which is a choice.

The multiple endings thing is funny because none of them are good. Like, morally good. You either pay off the debt by being a scumbag or you don't. I wish there was an ending where the models just take over the photography studio and run it as a collective. That won't happen. The whole thing feels like a lesson of passion project where the passion was for rendering breasts and the lesson was about compound interest. The dialogue is translated from something, maybe reality, maybe a dream. A character says "your camera is not the only thing that is big" and I had to close my browser and walk around my apartment. Then I opened it again. The gambler tag is accurate. You keep clicking, hoping the next scene will be hotter, or funnier, or something. It never quite gets there but the process of hoping is the game.

Ah, Star Slut. The title alone, right? It's like finding a bootleg Famicom cart at a market stall where the label is just a badly printed jpg of a scene you definitely don't remember from The Phantom Menace. The whole thing runs on this glorious, crunchy pixel engine that sounds like it was scored by a hungover LSDJ user, all buzzing square waves that fizzle when Padme’s tits inflate like someone hooked a bike pump to them. That breast expansion mechanic is the real hero here. Forget the Force, it’s pure, physics-defying bloat that happens with every rhythmic click. My only beef, and it’s a persistent one, is that the sound effect for it is just a stock balloon squeak. A goddamn balloon squeak. In a game where a stormtrooper is railing a senator so hard her tits are about to achieve orbit, you give me a sound effect from a children's birthday party? It’s so jarring it circles back to being art, I guess.

The core loop is what you’d expect from a Games of Desire joint. You’re on top, you’ve got this massive, absurdly pixelated cock, and you’re just plowing away at her pussy with the single-minded focus of a speedrunner. The goal is the creampie, naturally, and the buildup has this raw, jittery rhythm. You get these weird glitch frames where her face contorts, this silent scream that’s more unnerving than the actual moans. It’s a 3 on 1 scenario, but the other two guys are basically furniture, just standing there with their helmets on, probably sweating. Makes you wonder if they drew the short straws. The whole humiliation angle is delivered with the subtlety of a brick through a window, Padme’s dialogue is just broken, looping text strings that feel like they were run through a translator several times. “Make Padme scream like a bitch from Star Wars” is the promise, and it delivers a kind of uncanny valley wail that gets stuck in your head.

Wish there was a DLC that let you customize the stormtrooper’s armor. Like, give him a cape or something. A little flair. This won't happen, obviously. The whole thing has the energy of a corrupted.gif you'd find on a long-dead forum, and I mean that as the highest compliment. The cumshot is just a deluge of white pixels that completely overtakes the screen, a real 8-bit bukkake moment that chugs the framerate down to a slideshow. It’s glorious. I’d give it the “Most Unhinged Use of the Artoo Scream” award, which I just invented, because every time she climaxes, a heavily bitcrushed R2-D2 yell plays. Why? No reason. Perfect. Just perfect nonsense.