Right so the succubus general has these massive, absolutely ridiculous tits that bounce during the victory animation and I spent maybe fifteen minutes just losing on purpose to see if the defeat screen had anything good. It doesn't. That's the whole experience really, chasing something that isn't there while the actual game sits in front of you like an unread textbook.

The tactical layer is weirdly competent for something that's clearly built around the jiggle physics. You place warriors on a grid and move them around, flanking enemies and trying not to get your healers sniped by the AI which has this annoying habit of beelining for your softest units. My first run I stacked all the big titty succubi on one side thinking it'd be thematic or whatever and the enemy just walked past them and murdered my backline. Felt personal. The warrior class is supposed to be tanky but they move like they're wading through honey and by the time they reach anything the fight's already decided. There's this one map with a chokepoint where I accidentally discovered you can just park two units and the AI breaks completely, shuffling back and forth while you pick them off. Classic.

The art is that specific kind of unpolished where the nipples look like they were drawn by someone who's only ever seen breasts described in a police report. Which is fine. That's not a complaint. Actually it kind of is because if you're gonna center the whole experience around these character designs maybe spend more than seven minutes on the areolas. The succubus unit has a special ability that drains enemy health and the animation for it is just her standing there while a red particle effect happens. Revolutionary stuff.

I kept mixing up which unit was selected because the highlighting is this faint yellow outline that disappears entirely on certain terrain. Lost a healer that way. She just stood there while three enemies surrounded her and I was clicking furiously on what I thought was my damage dealer. The game doesn't have an undo button which at this point feels like a philosophical stance.