This thing feels like somebody grabbed a Sonic comic, spilled horny all over it, then tried to pretend it was a serious visual novel for like five seconds before giving up and going full hentai brain. You start out thinking “ok, it’s just Sonic talking, some banter, whatever” and then two choices later, boom, you’re arguing with yourself if it’s morally ok to want to rail your childhood mascot. The game knows exactly what you came for and still pretends it’s about “story” just long enough to make the horny parts hit harder. Sonic pops up all cocky like usual, but here his flirting is not subtle at all. It’s literally “hey, wanna go fast?” but now your brain hears it in the dirtiest way possible because of what the next scene does to you. Tails comes in and the whole thing suddenly feels more like a messy fanfic thread someone wrote at 3% sanity and 97% thirst. I clicked a dialogue choice that looked harmless, like just “ask Tails about the mission,” and two screens later his tail is doing things that will absolutely ruin the character for you forever. In a good way. Or bad. Depends how attached you are to your childhood.

The horny pacing is weird as hell, in a fun way. Sometimes it teases you for ten screens of goofy banter and “haha we’re just friends” while the camera keeps hanging a bit too low on certain body parts, then suddenly you’re in a full-on blowjob scene with barely one text box of transition. Other times, you pick the obviously pervy choice and the game is like “nah, not yet, suffer,” and sends you into some parody drama moment where Sonic acts all heroic but the dialogue is written like the writer was checking Pornhub tabs between lines. That’s kinda the charm though. It never feels clean or professional, it feels like horny fanfiction that accidentally grew choices and a UI. There was one scene in particular that stuck in my head way too long: Sonic pinning you against something that’s clearly supposed to be just a random rock, but the way the text describes where his hands go and how you grind against his hips, it reads like Tumblr roleplay logs from 2014, and I mean that as a compliment. Another route has Tails trying to act like a shy genius, but he’s talking about “testing a device” while touching you in ways that are very not scientific. The dialogue keeps bouncing between parody jokes about the old games and completely straight-up porn talk, like “haha remember the chaos emeralds” followed two lines later by “open your legs wider.” It should be stupid. It is stupid. I still clicked every single option to see all the stupid.

What I liked is how the choices sometimes pretend to matter. You pick “tease Sonic back” expecting just a slightly different line, and you instead unlock a more dominant version of him later, where he tells you to shut up while he fucks you. In another run I chose to be more submissive early on, and that turned Tails into this quietly possessive little shit who wants to “take measurements” of every part of your body with his hands. Some branches end quick with just one big sex scene and a few jokes, others drag you through this whole “we’re on an adventure” set up before finally letting anyone get naked. And the parody stuff is everywhere. You get references to rings, chaos, running fast, all of that, twisted into dirty metaphors. At one point Sonic literally compares your moans to the sound of picking up rings and I wanted to close the tab and also replay it. The tone is all over the place, but that makes it feel more human and horny, like that moment when you’re jacking off and suddenly remember a meme, laugh, then keep going anyway. It is messy, a bit cringe, very explicit, and absolutely not pretending to be anything else, no matter how much it flirts with “plot” along the way.