Beth is locked out of her hotel room...naked. Your job is to help her make the right choices that'll lead her to clothes without getting arrested or being seen by too many people in a short Choose-Your-Own-Adventure game with 3D Images.

Includes Miku's Strip Trivia Night.

This thing feels like someone grabbed your Steam library while drunk, smashed it together with Pornhub search history and then just said “yeah, that’s a universe now”. You start as this regular dude who absolutely should not be trusted with a portal-hopping device, and suddenly you are peeking into all these twisted versions of familiar worlds. One minute you are watching a redhead archer who is very obviously not Aloy grind her hips on some ancient machine while you are crouched in the bushes like a horny raccoon, next moment you jump to a rainy hellhole that smells like Silent Hill and Resident Evil had a baby, and Lady D is sitting on a throne with her thighs open, lazy as fuck, letting you worship her feet before she even looks at your face. The game does not even pretend to be subtle. It is like “here, you wanted Ellie with a knife and a dirty mouth, and you wanted to see if she kisses girls as aggressively as she stabs clickers? Cool, have a scene where she is shoving some punk girl against a wall, french kissing her while you watch from a half-broken window, hand in your pants, too scared to breathe because she almost catches you.”

The fun is how the game keeps throwing fanservice you did not know you wanted. Jinx is here, of course she is, wired on some shimmer knockoff, riding a dildo fixed to an old Zaun pipe and laughing like a maniac while you sneak under the catwalk to get a better angle on her dripping pussy. There is this whole cyberpunk city shard where Judy and Panam and Meredith all exist at the same time, like some weird mod that never got patched, and you get dragged into this fucked up NTR setup where your character gets to spy on Panam cheating on you with a chrome dom guy while Judy is under the table, licking Panam’s clit like it is some religious duty. You can join in, or you can just sit there and be a cuck voyeur, watching her swallow his dick on her knees while Panam moans your name by accident. The writing goes from funny to cruel in half a scene, like there is a Mass Effect corner where Miranda is using you like a toy, guiding your tongue over her ass, forcing you to rim her in an elevator, and then on the next jump you land in a cold Metro tunnel where Snezhana is giving some dirty, fast blowjob to survive and you kind of feel bad about how turned on you are.

Not everything hits right. There is a Game of Thrones cluster with Sansa, Arya, Cersei and Margaery, and it almost feels like the dev just dumped all their incest porn folder there and called it a day. One scene has Cersei sitting on the edge of a bed, her foot pressed on your chest, making you lick between her toes while she makes Sansa kneel and eat her out from behind, slow and obedient, like a trained dog, and it is hot, but then it cuts away way too soon and suddenly you are in some Tomb Raider ruin watching Lara and Kassandra compete who can make you cum faster with their mouth, and you never get closure on that foot thing. Same with Baldur’s Gate girls, like Shadowheart and Lae’zel and that green disaster Lae’zel’s friend whose name I always forget. One moment you are buried between Shadowheart’s thighs, tongue deep in her pussy, her hand on your hair pushing you to lick her ass too, soft little whines in your ear, and then the game just shoves you through another portal into some cursed TV zone that is basically The Ring with tits. Still, every now and then it nails that perfect mix of naughty fanfic and actual kink. Liara and Miranda double-teaming you, one riding your face while the other rides your cock, your hand tangled in blue skin and black hair, your vision all sweat and pussy. Lizzy Wizzy doing this weird chrome striptease before letting you jerk off on her feet. A lesbian alley scene with Zoe and Clementine lookalikes where they think no one sees them, kissing, giggling, fingers slipping into panties while rain hits the trash cans around them. Some parts feel rushed, some parts feel like the dev had one hand on the keyboard and one on their dick, but there is this stupid charm in how messy and raw it all is, like a huge crossover fanfic that forgot to be safe for work and never tried to fix itself.

This thing feels like someone grabbed your old TMNT VHS tape, ripped out all the kid-friendly stuff and just left April in the channel 99 porn scramble. You load it up and there she is, the same cocky reporter with the yellow outfit that every horny teenager had weird feelings about, except here the game just cuts straight to what everyone used to imagine in the background while Shredder was talking. No slow build, no fake romance, just April being treated like a fuck-toy in a world where the turtles are clearly busy somewhere else and nobody cares what the rating is anymore.

The whole thing plays like a horny fan’s browser tab that never got closed. You click, she reacts. You push further, she stops pretending she’s innocent. There is one bit where she’s still trying to do her “serious journalist” act, microphone in hand, and two seconds later that same mouth is full of cock and the mic might as well not exist. I actually liked the way her tits move when she leans forward, there’s this messy wobble that looks almost wrong, like the dev didn’t fully test that animation, but it ends up feeling nastier in a good way. There’s no soft fade, no shy teasing, it’s straight “get your dick out, here’s April’s throat” type of pace. You go from grabbing her by the hair to pinning her against some dirty wall so fast that your brain needs a second to catch up, which is funny because the game doesn’t wait for you at all. Sometimes the click zones are a bit janky, like you try to switch from throat fucking to pounding her pussy and it switches twice, so she ends up stuck in this weird half-animation where she’s moaning like she’s got a dick in both places and the sound doesn’t really match. I kept trying to fix it, then realized it kind of turned me on more, like I’d broken her for good.

The “hard sex” part is not some tag someone added for fun, it’s actually the whole point. Her eyes water, mascara almost looks melted, her lips stay swollen even after you pull out, and there is this one frame when you go too fast and her expression turns from horny to “holy shit this is too much” for half a second before it snaps back. I replayed that part way too long, trying to catch it again. Also her boobs… they are not real, of course, but they have this push-up porn look that feels ripped straight from some low-res tube site clip. Nipples always just a bit too hard, always centered perfectly when you yank her outfit down. I wish they’d let you ruin her clothes more, shred the yellow suit, rip the belt off, something like that, but the game is stubborn about keeping the outfit mostly in one piece, like it wants you to remember the original cartoon while you’re fucking her silly. And for some reason there’s this tiny delay after you finish, like a half-second freeze where your browser just stares at you with her covered in cum, and you’re not sure if it’s a bug or just the game judging you. That stupid pause annoyed me every single time and I still went back in for another round without even thinking about it.

Dare to play it alone, or invite company?

Ty Lee in a tiny swimsuit on the beach already feels kind of illegal to watch, right? This thing drops you straight into that horny daydream: hot sand, bright water, and her bounced right in front of you with those huge, soft-looking tits that you can make even bigger until it’s almost stupid. She’s that playful acrobat girl from Avatar, all giggles and curves, but here she’s pinned in one rough, simple position that never changes, and somehow that makes it hotter. No fancy story, no long build up, just her getting fucked hard while you sit there clicking like a degenerate with one hand. I had Spotify on in the background, some chill track, and it totally didn’t match what was happening on screen, but whatever, she’s moaning, her ass shaking, and the guy just keeps pounding her.

What I like is how quick you can mess with her look. One second she’s in this tight swimsuit that digs into her ass, the next she’s naked and already dripping, and you’re playing with sliders like it’s The Sims but filthy. Breast size up, down, up again, too much, then a bit less because you want to see them really bounce when he slams into her. Hair all dark and shiny, skin catching the light like she’s been swimming. There’s this moment when you switch from pussy to anal and your brain goes “ok, that’s too much for her” and then she just takes it, and the camera doesn’t look away, it goes right in, like the game is saying “no, you’re watching all of this, you little creep.” The xray view is nasty in a good way, like those old hentai loops you find on some trashy site at work on your phone when you promised yourself just a quick peek during lunch. You click it, suddenly you see inside her, cock stretching her out from the inside, and your mouse hand just kind of pauses there.

Sometimes it feels lazy that there is only one position, like come on, she’s an acrobat, hang her from a tree or something, flip her upside down, let her ride. Then again, I kept that same angle the whole time and didn’t change it because it scratches a very simple itch: watch her get wrecked, see the cumshot hit her face or fill her up, and then switch again and watch the other hole take it. Creamy mess on her pussy, then reload and go again, trying a different combo of clothing and size like you’re doing some cursed fashion show. Little thing annoyed me: her swimsuit keeps looking a bit too clean, like she walked out of a catalogue, and I kind of wanted sand sticking to her thighs or a strap digging too hard into her boobs, something trashier. But then he pulls out and just paints her face, thick white streaks dripping over her lips and chin, and I forget I was supposed to be “critical” at all. It’s just one of those browser smut toys that you tell yourself you’ll try for a minute and then suddenly you’re adjusting her tits for the fifth time, hunting for that perfect angle of her ass getting filled, breathing a bit too fast in front of the monitor like some horny teenager who never grew up.