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AI JERK OFF
Friends in Need: Blue Valentine v1.0
5.0 0

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⏰ Added: 👁 81
Money fucks with your head in this one, in a slow, sneaky way. You start as this guy who once made a terrible move with cash, the kind of shit choice that burns into your brain and never really goes away, even when life calms down again. Then suddenly the universe flips you off and kisses you at the same time: that same financial ghost comes back, but now it turns you rich. Like, stupid rich. And right when you’re still trying to understand how the hell your bank app grew an extra digit, your best friend shows up on your door, broke and scared and trying to smile through it. She’s that old crush you never really got over. You hear her voice crack a little when she explains her money problem, and the game lets that sound hang in the air just a bit too long. It’s not subtle. It’s not trying to be clever. It just goes, “Here, feel this,” and you do. And you’re sitting there, cursor on the choice, thinking: do I help her like a saint, or do I help her like a horny bastard who suddenly owns the world. The rhythm is slow in the best scenes. Dialog boxes stay on screen just a fraction longer than you expect, the kind of delay that makes silence feel loud. When she laughs awkwardly, it’s almost worse than when she moans later, because you know she’s vulnerable now. Later, when those moans finally start, they’re not over-produced or clean. A bit ragged. A bit too intimate. Like the dev recorded them in a tiny room with the mic a little too close. It fits the whole messy “I probably shouldn’t be doing this” vibe.

The game keeps tossing you into these crossroads where your wallet and your dick are basically arguing. Help someone out with no strings and you kind of feel this soft warmth in your chest. Use the same situation to push a boundary and you feel... dirty, in a hot way, but also like you want to alt-tab and check Twitter memes to pretend you’re a better person. One minute you’re approving a loan rescue, next minute you’re deciding if that rescue also comes with her on her knees on the living room carpet, eyes glossy, thanking you with her mouth instead of a contract. And the thing is, it doesn’t even shove you straight into the filth. It creeps. A hand on a thigh while you’re “comforting” her. Her saying she doesn’t know how she can ever repay you, glancing away, cheeks warm. You can back off. You really can. The “good guy” route is there, and it actually feels wholesome in a way that almost pissed me off. I was planning to go full corruption, then she called me “the only person who’s always been kind to me” and my brain short-circuited. Still went pervy later, of course. Just… slower. Softer. Then suddenly not soft at all. One choice chain has her in a tight outfit she clearly can’t afford, shyly asking if you still think she looks pretty even after everything. Another path makes that same scene twist into her almost selling herself to you because she thinks she has no other option. That shift in tone hits hard, like when a porn scene suddenly feels too real and you have to decide if you’re turned on or uncomfortable. I loved it. I hated it. I clicked again.

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