My kid found this game. She's 13, I'm not stupid, I know she looks at things. But I was checking the browser history, not to spy, just... you know. And there it was. Some site with a name I won't repeat. This game loaded right up, no login, nothing. Just two girls in school uniforms in a classroom after hours.

The art is flat, like someone drew it on a napkin and scanned it. No shading. The animation loops are maybe four frames total. One girl is bent over a desk and the other has this bright purple plastic thing strapped on. The sounds are... wet. Repetitive. A squelch track that plays every two seconds regardless of what's happening on screen. It drove me up the wall after thirty seconds. There's a button to switch positions, I think, but it just kind of jumps to a different angle with the same loop. The licking part is somehow more graphic than the rest, and I've seen actual adult films that handled this with more subtlety. The tongues don't even line up right.

I sat there watching it for longer than I'd like to admit, not because it was good but because I couldn't figure out if there was more to it. There isn't. You click and things happen. That's the whole thing. The uniform skirts are so short they might as well not exist, which is a choice. A very specific choice that made me close the laptop and go make tea and stare at the wall. I wish the characters had names or any personality beyond the default moaning. Wouldn't that be something? Actual characters.

The "strapon" tag is accurate, I'll give them that. It's right there on the table at the start, glowing almost, like a power-up in a normal game. The whole thing feels like someone's first Flash project from 2006 that they forgot to delete. My daughter thinks I don't know about clearing history. She's wrong.