ok so you know that feeling when a porn game actually has a mechanic that makes you think instead of just clicking? this weird ping pong poker hybrid with android 18 cosplay got me. the core loop is you're playing pong but the ball is a card and you have to bounce back the shitty ones. like literally you see a 2 of clubs coming at you and you gotta let it hit your paddle to reject it. only keep the good cards. build a poker hand this way. sounds simple but my brain kept short circuiting when the ball sped up and i'm trying to figure out if i need that queen or not while a blonde in a denim vest is slowly losing clothes on the other side of the screen.

the real model thing is... a choice. it's clearly some onlyfans cosplayer they filmed doing a striptease. the lighting is flat, the loop is janky, she has that "i'm reading cue cards off camera" energy. but honestly? that's what makes it work. feels like stumbling onto someone's weird fetish project from 2006. the public setting in the background is just a blurry photo of what might be a park. nobody reacts. she's just there. stripping. while you play pong poker. the dragon ball z connection is thin as hell too, it's just the blonde wig and the android 18 vest. no ki blasts, no vegeta, nothing. missed opportunity for a galick gun power up that clears bad cards or something.

the arcade mode has no end. you just keep going until you bust or quit. i got a full house once and the video advanced like two frames. two. the strip pacing is glacial. but i kept playing. something about the card rejection mechanic is genuinely addictive. wish there was a way to see what hand you're building without glancing away from the paddle. the dbz tag is doing a lot of heavy lifting here, it's basically just blonde + vest = dragon ball. still. better than half the idle clickers on the hub. the poker part is real poker hands at least, not some made up bullshit. i checked. royal flush is possible but good luck with the rng on these bounces.