Right so Slave Trainer. That’s literally the working title. The game itself tells you it doesn’t have a name yet. The menu is a placeholder jpeg that looks like it was made in MS Paint during a hostage situation. I clicked start anyway because I’m a degenerate with curiosity.

You crash land on a desert continent, except the crash is like two lines of text. No animation, no sound effect, just “you crashed lol now walk.” There’s a queen’s palace full of slaves and you’re supposed to become her personal trainer. The whole thing runs in browser and feels like someone’s first Twine project but hornier. You click around this spaceship interior that’s just a static background with some buttons, then suddenly you’re on sand, then suddenly there’s a palace. The transitions are nonexistent. It’s almost beautiful how little it cares.

The training stuff. You get these vague quest prompts like “train slave 3” and then it’s just clicking through dialogue trees where the writing alternates between surprisingly decent degradation and stuff that reads like google translate had a stroke. One slave kept calling me “master lord sir” which honestly felt accurate for the fever dream quality of this thing. The exploration is clicking different rooms in the palace that all look identical. I spent ten minutes trying to find the throne room and it turned out I was in it the whole time, the background just didn’t change.

There’s something almost hypnotic about how unfinished it is. Like watching a car crash in slow motion but the car is made of horny placeholder art. The quest log is broken in a way where completed quests just linger there forever, haunting you. I kind of respect it. Most adult games try to hide their jank behind flashy renders, this one just wears its incompleteness like a badge. “Name of Game Undecided” indeed. At one point I clicked a door and it just reset my progress to zero. No warning, no error, just back to the crash landing text. I laughed. I cried. I clicked start again.