Right so the stat screen in this thing is a mess. I mean that in the best way. You got your usual RPG numbers, strength, charisma, whatever, but then there's a bar just labeled "Game" and I still don't know what it does. I pumped it to 47 and a girl at the library just started talking about her ex boyfriend unprompted. No fade to black, no reward, just a full minute of text about some guy named Derek who works in finance. I had to close the tab and walk around my apartment.

The core loop is you grind stats to unlock sex scenes with women scattered around a tiny city map. The bar, the gym, the park. Standard pickup artist simulator stuff but the translation is so broken it wraps back around to being art. You read a book titled "How to Talk" and your intelligence goes up by one. You sleep in your bed and the text just says "You are not tired but you sleep anyway." Felt that in my soul. The women all have these massive, absurdly proportioned chests that clip through their own arms when they gesture. One of them requires level 20 confidence and when you finally hit it she just says "ok" and the scene triggers. No buildup. Just "ok" and then the explicit stuff happens with these dead eyed character models that stare directly at the camera the whole time.

I wish the gym minigame wasn't just clicking a button. You click the bench press and a number goes up. That's it. No animation, no sound. Just number go up, neuron activation. I clicked it four hundred times. My character is now a god of lifting and women in the bar still tell me I look like I play video games. The self awareness is painful. There's a nightclub that's always "closed for renovation" and I keep checking it every time I play even though I know it'll never open. That's on me.