Right, so this is one of those Porn Bastards joints, the Shaundi episode. You know the drill if you've seen their stuff before. It's that Saints Row chick, but like, the version from your spank bank after a few too many energy drinks. The whole thing is deliberately rough around the edges, that's the whole vibe. It's not trying to be some slick, polished hentai game. It's got that janky charm, like a flash game from the golden era that somehow survived the purge.

You click "Next" through some dialogue that's basically just an excuse to get her clothes off. And that's where the weird little customization panel in the corner comes in. You can tweak her look a bit, change the speed of the action. I spent a solid minute just messing with the speed slider, going from a slow grind to some jackhammer nonsense that looked physically impossible. The undress part is a whole thing too. It's not just a one-click deal, you get to peel her out of that top piece by piece, and yeah, the big tits tag is not lying. They're comically large, the kind of physics-defying orbs that would give a real person back problems for life. But that's the point, right? It's pure fantasy, no apologies.

The cumshot at the end is... a lot. It's the main event, the whole reason you're clicking through. It's messy, over the top, and exactly what you'd expect from the tags. I found myself getting way more into the customization part than I thought I would. Like, finding the perfect angle and speed became a weird little minigame in itself. The whole thing is a one-handed time waster that knows exactly what it is. It's not deep, the story is thinner than a wet napkin, but if you're here for Shaundi and a big cock doing its thing, you're not gonna be disappointed. Just don't go in expecting a character study. It's a quick, dirty loop and then you're done. The "next" button is your whole life for ten minutes.

The blue chick just stands there, tits out, while the tentacle goes to work. I picked the face option first because the cum button was right there and my thumb slipped, honestly. The weird greenish goo shot all over her nose and cheek and it stayed there, dripping, while the next round loaded. You don't get many of these browser hentai things where the aftermath hangs around like that. Usually it fades or resets too fast. Here the mess just sits on her face while you scroll the actions again.

The actions themselves are basic. Tap a tentacle, it moves. Tap another, it does something else. There's no real puzzle or timing thing. But the loop got me anyway. I kept pressing the same one over and over, the one that makes her hips jerk forward, because the sound design, if you can call it that, has this wet slap that's way too loud. Like someone recorded a hand hitting a wet towel and turned the gain up. It's dumb but it worked on me. The blue skin and the halo thing, yeah it's supposed to be Cortana or whatever, but the face is generic enough that you stop caring after a minute.

One thing nobody mentions. When you finally hit cum while a tentacle is still inside her pussy, the creampie animation loops for like ten seconds. The goo keeps pulsing out. I sat there watching it, not even touching the screen, which is weird for a game that's basically two buttons and a blue chick. My only real complaint is that the facial cum looks more like alien snot than actual jizz. Wrong color. But maybe that's the point, she's not human so who knows what the plant stuff is packing.

If you're on mobile, just tap the bottom right corner blindly. That's the cum button. Don't overthink it. The tentacle will do the rest.

The wallpaper. This is what gets me stuck. There's a pattern on the wall in Katsumi's living room, and it's this beige floral thing that just keeps repeating, and at one point her shadow falls across it weird and I spent maybe five full minutes thinking about how nobody ever comments on the wallpaper in these games. The textures don't line up at the corner seam. You can see it if you catch the right angle during the uh, the repair.

Anyway she's married. Katsumi Reachman. The name sounds like someone tried to remember "Katsumi" and "something else" at the same time and just committed to both. She's got this bored housewife energy that's honestly more convincing than the later stuff. Her husband apparently exists but you know Lesson of Passion games, the husband exists in the same way a chair exists, he's just there for context. The repairman shows up and the choice system kicks in, not that the choices ever take you anywhere surprising. I picked "watch" first because I'm like that, and she just sort of... proceeds.

The cock is big. I mean obviously, it's right there in the tags, but what got me was her expression when she first looks at it. There's this half second where something flickers, like the animator accidentally drew a real emotion instead of the standard "oh dear" face. Then it's gone and we're into the interracial repairman blowjob proper, and she's on her knees, and the cumshot splashes across her face with this wet sound effect that's exactly the same stock clip used in every Lesson of Passion title back to 2006 probably.

I do wonder, and this isn't a criticism really but more of a curiosity, why the repairman never fixes anything. Like his toolbox is there, open, couple of wrenches sticking out, but the TV just stays broken the whole time. Maybe that's the point. The cycle continues. There's this one moment where the player has to click "continue" and the game just sort of hangs for a second, loading the next scene, and the audio pops, and it's so unpolished that it actually works better than if it were smooth.

Elizabeth from Bioshock Infinite, but she's got her mouth full and her hand busy. That's the whole pitch. 20 scenes, press A to go forward, R to go back. You know exactly what you're getting into.

The voice work is weirdly good. Like, someone actually tried to make her sound like the game character, breathy and a little desperate. The animation is janky in places, her hair clips through her shoulder during the pov handjob, and the cumshot lands on her chin but the texture looks like yogurt left in the sun. I kept replaying that one scene where she looks up at the camera, eyes half closed, because the angle was perfect even if the loop stuttered for a second. The multiple camera views help, you can zoom in on her lips or pull back to see the whole mess.

There's no story. She doesn't talk about Columbia or Booker or any of that. It's just her, a bed, and a lot of enthusiastic sucking. The blowjob scenes have this wet sound effect that's almost too loud, like someone recorded a plunger in a sink. But then the handjob scene starts and she whispers something about wanting to see you finish, and I forgot what I was complaining about.

The controls are basic, no menu to speak of, just the A and R keys. If you accidentally hit R too many times you're back at the start and have to spam A through the boring intro again. That's my only real gripe, besides the fact that there's no cum inside option. For a parody this dedicated to the character, you'd think they'd include that. Maybe a DLC where she uses her tears to bring in another version of herself? Just a thought.

I keep coming back to the breast expansion slider. Not because it's particularly well animated, it's janky as hell honestly, but because it's so specific. You get this little control panel and Bulma just... inflates. Like someone hooked her up to a bicycle pump. The physics make no sense. Her spine would snap. I spent maybe fifteen minutes just making her chest go up and down, up and down, completely ignoring the actual sex options. The game is basically a posable Bulma doll with some sticky controls.

The dress up part is weirdly detailed for something this rough. You can strip her piece by piece, her top, her skirt, and the fabric just vanishes. No tearing animation, no sound, just gone. Then you click her boobs and they jiggle with this weird delayed reaction, like they're underwater. The blowjob scene has her head bobbing with the mechanical rhythm of a metronome. You get a facial cumshot button that just plasters her glasses and hair with a static white texture that doesn't drip or anything. It's so blunt it circles back around to being funny. The doggystyle position has her ass up but her face is completely blank, staring at the wall like she's mentally doing her taxes. There's a creampie toggle that just... adds a white puddle. No animation, just appears. Like a sticker.

I got distracted thinking about how Dragonball hentai is its own entire ecosystem. There's probably a thousand of these flash dumps floating around since 2005. This one feels like it was made in an afternoon by someone who really, really needed to see Bulma get railed and didn't care about anything else. The hard sex option is just the same loop but faster. The pussy play is just clicking and watching the same two frames. It's not good. But I kept clicking. The Warcraft tag is a lie by the way, there's no orcs or elves, just Bulma's giant blue hair clipping through her shoulders. Flying tree frog? No idea. Maybe it's a metaphor for how her tits float when you max the expansion slider.

The tanlines on Luci are the first thing you notice, that stark pale strip across her tits and hips where the bikini sat. She's blonde, sprawled out on the massage table like she owns the place, and the whole setup is basically a delivery mechanism for getting your hands on her. No complex menus, no wandering around a town collecting herbs or whatever. Just click and grope.

And the grope works, sort of. The physics on her chest are ridiculous, like water balloons with a mind of their own. You're supposed to be massaging but the game knows why you're here. Click the oil bottle, smear it around, watch her squirm. The sound design is... a choice. Every squelch is so wet it borders on comedy, like someone stepping in mud. Voice acting is mostly just breathy moans that loop a bit too fast, so after thirty seconds it sounds like she's hyperventilating. There's this one transition to anal that caught me off guard because the camera just snaps into position with zero warning. Felt like a jump scare in a porn game.

The cumshot mechanic is where things get genuinely stupid. You build up this meter by doing the same three motions over and over, and when it triggers, the animation plays out with all the grace of a flipbook drawn by a horny teenager. The blonde's expression barely changes. She's got this permanent half-lidded stare that's supposed to be sultry but reads more like she's trying to remember if she left the stove on. Still, the bikini stays on for way too long in some scenes and then vanishes entirely in others with no logic. Like, pick a lane. The tight pussy and ass content is all there, delivered with the enthusiasm of a vending machine. You put in clicks, you get out moans. Not exactly a five-star experience but I've definitely played worse on my phone during a boring commute. The whole thing feels like it was coded in a weekend by someone who really, really needed to see specific tanlines on a specific blonde and didn't care about much else. And honestly? For what it is, the tanlines do look good. The rest is just... there.

Makoto’s tail does this little twitch right before she cums. I spent way too long noticing that. The third Blazblue thing, whatever it’s called, drops you straight into a room with her and a menu that’s basically a sex position selector. No story, no pretense. You want a blowjob from a squirrel girl with tits bigger than her head? Click. You want to swap her hair color or throw some weird bikini on her? There’s a button for that too. It’s crude but honest.

The POV stuff is the main draw. Camera sits right where your face would be while she’s going down, and the cumshot lands exactly where you’d expect. The titjob scene has her pressing those things together with this bored expression that’s either bad rigging or perfect character work, I can’t tell. The creampie finish during the sex scene has a weird delay, like the game forgets what it’s doing for half a second, then remembers. I wish the fur texture had more going on, but it won’t.

Honestly the whole thing feels like someone ripped a few loops from a bigger project and called it a day. The audio is just wet sounds and her gasps, no music, no voice acting. Which is fine, I guess. You’re not here for lore. The customization is deeper than it needs to be, like you can change her eye color but not the position of the camera during the boobjob, which is stuck at a weird angle. That bugged me more than it should.

It’s a five minute fap tool with a Blazblue skin. If you know Makoto from the fighting games, you’ll get a kick out of seeing her like this. If you don’t, it’s just another furry porn loop with a cum counter. Either way, you’ll close the tab and forget about it until next time.

The squelch is all wrong. I spent maybe twenty minutes just reloading the final scene because the wet sound effect cuts off a frame too early. It's this truncated little "splrt" that doesn't match the visual at all, and once you notice it, it's like a dead pixel on a monitor. You can't unhear it. The whole Flying Tree Frog series has this problem, this weird audio mix where the moans are recorded way too hot and clip slightly, but the skin slaps are buried under a layer of what sounds like someone stirring mac and cheese. It's not a dealbreaker, but it's the kind of thing that pulls me right out.

Oba's back, same chubby brunette with that ridiculous ass, and this time there's more positions. The POV setup is standard stuff, you pick a scene and eventually get to paint her. The cumshot mechanic is basically a free-aim minigame at the end, and the physics on the droplets are surprisingly decent. They pool and drip with actual weight, which is more than I can say for the stiff hair animation that looks like it's been starched. One angle has her looking back over her shoulder, and the expression is locked in this permanent "mild inconvenience" face that's honestly funnier than it should be. I kept expecting her to ask if I'd finished yet so she could check her phone.

The sound design, back to that. The ambient room tone is completely silent between moans, this dead digital void that makes every breath feel isolated and weird. No reverb, no body presence. It's like fucking in an anechoic chamber. I ended up muting the game and pulling up a generic "wet sounds" playlist from my phone, which synced up better by accident. The whole thing feels like a rough cut where someone forgot to master the audio tracks. Still, I kept replaying that one reverse cowgirl loop because the rhythm of the animation, once you ignore the broken squelch, has this hypnotic bounce that's hard to look away from. The chubby belly jiggle is a nice touch most games skip. Dare to play it alone, or invite company?

I gotta say, that "control" mechanic? It's weirdly distracting in a game that's basically just two characters going at it like they're trying to kill each other. Yoruichi's on top, right, and she's riding Renji like she's still in some Soul Society brawl, all that aggression and speed, and then suddenly there's this meter on screen telling me her pussy might "burn" if she goes too fast. What the fuck does that even mean? Is it friction? Is it some spiritual pressure thing? They never explain, and I spent way too long staring at that little gauge instead of, you know, the actual scene. The art is rough, deliberately messy lines that somehow work for the parody angle. Renji's cock is drawn like a third arm, ridiculously oversized, and Yoruichi's boobs bounce with this janky physics that reminds me of those old Flash animations on Newgrounds. Not smooth, but there's a charm to it. Like someone sketched this on a napkin after watching too much Bleach filler.

The cumshot is the whole payoff. You're supposed to manage her pace so Renji can finish, and when he does, it's... a lot. Splashes across her stomach, her chest, this exaggerated mess that feels almost mocking of the source material. I laughed, honestly. The voice work, if you can call it that, is just grunts and gasps on loop, and there's this one sound Yoruichi makes that got stuck in my head for an hour after. Not in a good way.

Speaking of voices, Renji barely makes a sound. Dude just lies there, taking it, and I guess that's accurate to his personality? Always getting wrecked by stronger women. But still, a little reaction would've been nice. The whole thing feels like a fever dream where someone remembered Bleach existed and thought, "What if they fucked but it was also a minigame?" The 3 on 1 tag is a lie, by the way. It's just the two of them. Unless you count the player as the third, which, I mean, I wasn't touching anything. My phone screen got a little warm from running this in Chrome, that's my contribution.