Pastville. The name alone should tip you off. This place is like a screensaver from 1998, and you're Alex, stuck in this beige hellhole dreaming of Woodward and Bernstein shit while your actual life is just... stale coffee. The whole investigative journalist angle, right, that's the carrot. You're poking around, trying to dig up a story that isn't about Mrs. Gable's prize winning petunias.

The art, god, the character sprites look like they were sketched on a bar napkin and then someone spilled a drink on it. But the CG scenes. The CG scenes are where the budget went, and I am not complaining. It's that specific kind of hentai where everything gets a little too glossy, proportions go haywire in the best way. There's this one scene early on with your neighbor, total himbo energy, where he's "fixing your sink" and you choose to hand him a wrench with, let's say, unintentional implications. The mystery isn't exactly Agatha Christie, more like "where did I leave my cynicism," but then the story takes a weirdly dark turn I did not see coming, something about a missing person that's actually... wait, no, I'm thinking of a different game. In this one, the big mystery is whether you can afford rent. The choice system feels like it was programmed by someone who just discovered variables, but damn if it doesn't make the build up to those hentai scenes feel earned.

I just wish there was a gallery. A game with scenes this freakishly well drawn and no way to replay them without saving is a crime against, uh, science. Pure disrespect for the user's time.

You'll meet Mila, this obnoxious barista who is literally a single giant eye and a bad attitude, and her scenes are the game's masterpiece, pure surreal, sticky nonsense. Don't think, just click. Save often, right before you think anything remotely interesting might happen, like accepting a drink from the sketchy dude in the alley. His route is a trip. Just embrace the jank, it's part of the flavor. The newspaper minigame is broken though, don't even try.

Grandparents vanish, everybody shrugs, and years later you roll in like some half-baked detective with a hard-on and a phone that never stops buzzing. That’s basically the energy here. You’re supposed to be this serious investigator, asking around town about what happened to your old folks, but every single person you meet is either horny, hiding something, or both. One second you’re checking out a crime scene, the next you’re staring at a milf’s ridiculous tits while she pretends she “can’t remember” anything unless you help her relax a bit. And yeah, relax means exactly what you think. The game just leans into that whole “I should focus on the case but my dick has other plans” vibe and somehow it works. Not in a classy way. More like Pornhub glued to a cheap sci‑fi detective comic.

What I really like is how your phone basically becomes your second brain. You’re on Telegram with some girl who’s “too shy” to talk in person, then she sends a pic that absolutely says she’s not shy. You swap between chats, clues, and porn-tier selfies like it’s just another Tuesday. The whole world feels like a horny group chat that escaped into a visual novel. One moment you’re following a lead about some weird lab your grandparents were involved with, clicking through dialogue options, trying to sound smart. Then out of nowhere, a chick with a big ass and some lowkey scary vibe is like, “I can show you what your grandpa liked.” And now you’re naked in a room with glowing toys and some subtle superpower shit going on while she edges you just to see how long you last. The game doesn’t even pause and explain the powers. Stuff just happens. People float a thing with their mind, or read your thoughts while you masturbate in the shower, then act like this is normal. Honestly, I kinda respect it. Also, fuck whoever designed that tiny settings icon in the corner. I mis-tap it every damn time and end up squinting like grandpa again.

The funny part is, for something with aliens, superpowers, and a mystery about vanished grandparents, the moments that really stick are you sitting on a bed, phone in hand, watching a girl strip on video because you picked the teasing option instead of the horny brute one. Or peeking through a half-open door like some busted voyeur while a dominant older woman toys with a younger girl and pretends she doesn’t see you. She absolutely sees you. That whole exhibition thing is constant. Public showers, open windows, “oops I dropped my towel” scenes, people using toys in places where any sane person would lock three doors first. You keep thinking “ok, this is too much” and then they drop a line about your grandparents being mixed up in all this pervy sci‑fi stuff and you go right back into detective mode, clicking through leads, forgetting you still have cum on your hand. It plays like a horny sandbox where the investigation is just an excuse to keep meeting weird, hot people who have no respect for personal space. If you’re the kind of player who taps through romance options while half-watching Netflix, this will absolutely wreck your focus in the nastiest way.

So my kid is playing this thing, Rebels of the College, and I walk in and there's this detective girl with glasses and her shirt is, well, not buttoned. At all. I'm standing there with laundry basket thinking is this what passes for a campus rebellion now? The plot, if you can call it that, is about some rich bastard running the university into the ground and your guy has to stop him because his sister worked hard or something. Noble cause. Very inspiring. Meanwhile I'm watching animated tits bounce while someone explains clues about corruption.

The detective character, she's supposed to be investigating the bad guy but half the time she's bent over a desk with her skirt hiked up. There's this one scene where you have to choose between confronting the dean or sneaking into his office and I swear the game spent more time rendering the sweat drops on her chest than the actual evidence you're supposed to find. The competition tag makes sense I guess because you're competing against the rich kid but also competing to see how many positions you can unlock with the teacher character who has this thing for staying after class. You know, for extra credit.

The art is that cg hentai style where everything is too shiny. Like everyone's skin is made of plastic wrap. There's a moment where the student council president, who's supposed to be intimidating, is giving a speech about justice and the camera just slowly pans down to her panties. I don't know what the message is here. Fight the power but also here's a closeup of a wet crotch. My son says it's about strategy and choices but I saw the save file names and they're all just different sex scenes. The intrigue tag is doing a lot of heavy lifting.

Claire's birthdays are a real shitshow. Dad vanished when she turned 17, mom croaked on her 18th, and now at 19 she's poking through dead people's case files looking for answers. The whole thing has this grimy detective vibe, like you're actually digging through someone's messy apartment instead of clicking through a polished menu. Some of the CG hentai scenes hit hard, especially when she's alone in her room late at night, fingers working under the sheets while staring at old photographs. That's the kind of fucked up grief horniness that feels real.

The choices matter more than I expected. One wrong click during an interrogation and you miss a whole branch where Claire ends up trading sexual favors for information from some sleazy informant. There's a scene where she lets a suspect grope her tits in exchange for a key clue, and the game doesn't judge you for it. It just shows her face afterwards, that mix of shame and determination. Weirdly hot.

But the pacing drags in the middle. Too many dialogue boxes about alibis and timestamps, not enough actual nudity. And the surprise tag? Yeah, there's a twist involving her mom's old partner that I saw coming from a mile away. Still, the mystery keeps pulling you back. What happened to her father? Why does every birthday end in disaster? The game never fully answers, which is either lazy writing or genius. Probably lazy.

The visual novel format works fine, but sometimes the text describes actions the art doesn't show. Like, she's supposedly masturbating in one scene but the CG just shows her blushing with hands off screen. Come on. Show the wet fingers. We're all adults here.

Mariene is 46 and her husband just vanished. Not dead, not confirmed anything, just... gone. The landlord thing is what she does now, but the game keeps flashing back to this younger version of herself who wanted to be a cop. And somehow, despite everything, she gets into the police academy. That's where the corruption tag really earns its place.

The visual novel structure is pretty standard, you click through dialogue and occasionally hit a CG scene that's fully illustrated. What's weird is how the game handles her age. Most hentai VNs would make the older woman a milf stereotype immediately, but Mariene's desperation feels different. She's not seducing anyone for fun. Her boss puts her in these situations that get progressively more degrading, and the mystery element is supposed to be about finding Claude, but honestly after the third "unusual situation" you realize the investigation is just a vehicle for watching this woman compromise herself piece by piece. The detective tag is almost misleading. There's no real deduction happening.

The art during the explicit scenes is actually pretty detailed, lots of close-up CG where her expression shifts from reluctant to something more complicated. One scene in particular where she's in the academy locker room, still half in uniform, and her internal monologue is fighting between "this is for the mission" and something else entirely. The corruption isn't instant. It's that slow burn where she starts rationalizing.

The English translation has that charming brokenness where dialogue sometimes reads like it was filtered through two languages and a hangover. "To capitalize on a rare chance, her boss places her in various unusual situations when she enters." That's an actual sentence from the description and it's exactly how the whole game feels. You get the meaning but the grammar is doing parkour.

I wish the mystery actually mattered. Claude who? By the midpoint I forgot she even had a husband. The game forgets too, mostly. There's this one CG where she's bent over a desk and you can see her wedding ring and it's supposed to be this dramatic moment but it just made me wonder if the artist got paid extra for that detail. The police academy setting is underused. Could have been any workplace really.

So you're this college kid, right, just moved out, got your own place near campus, life's kinda chill. Then poof, parents gone. Vanished. Mom, dad, just... not there. You try calling, nothing. You hit up mom's friend, some lady who probably knows more than she's letting on, and she gives you the runaround. Dead end. Classic. And the whole time you're digging through this mess, the game's throwing these CG hentai scenes at you that are, honestly, way hotter than a missing persons case has any right to be.

The detective stuff is janky but in a way that works. You click around, you talk to people, you piece together what happened. Or you try to. I spent like ten minutes stuck on one dialogue tree because I was distracted by a certain milf character's... let's call it evidence. The humor is weirdly on point too, like the game knows it's a porn plot but commits to the bit anyway. There's this one scene with a landlady that had me actually laughing before things got, uh, explicit. The mystery itself is pretty standard, some family drama, some shady vibes, but then it throws a twist that I did not see coming. Or maybe I'm just dumb. Could be both.

The art is that specific CG hentai style, very clean, very detailed when it wants to be. The student characters look their age, which is a relief, and the older women have that whole... you know. The thing. The animations are minimal but the stills are where it's at. I do wish the mystery part had more actual detective work instead of just clicking the obvious shiny object, but whatever, I'm not here for a Sherlock Holmes simulator. There's this one easter egg if you keep bothering the cat, I won't spoil it. Just do it.

Future players, my advice: save often, because some choices lock you out of scenes and you'll want to see all the spicy bits. Don't ignore the side conversations, that's where half the good stuff hides. And for the love of god, when the mom's friend offers you tea, say yes. Trust me on this one. The game's a mess but it's a fun mess, like finding a dirty magazine in a library book. You didn't come for it but you're not mad it's there.

I'm calling it now. Best Game To Make You Feel Like A Creepy Little Shit Award. This Sewell Plaza thing, right? You're some kid playing detective in a future apartment block after some big disaster. Sounds cute. It's not. It's a slow burn into a dumpster fire of lies and perversion and I'm here for it.

The pixel art is deliberately rough, like someone drew it on a napkin after a bad dream. You wander around, clicking on doors, talking to the same few neighbors. The community is tight knit, they say. Bullshit. Everyone's got a secret and your little detective wannabe ass is gonna sniff them out. Found Mrs. Tanaka's diary under a loose floorboard. Didn't expect the detailed descriptions of her "special" community service meetings with the block leader. My jaw was on the floor. The corruption tag isn't just for the society, it's for your own brain as you piece together who's screwing who, and what weird hentai logic holds this place together. The game doesn't hold your hand. Miss a clue in the laundry room and you'll never find out why the water pressure drops every night at 9 PM. And the sound design? A single looping drone that drills into your skull. Perfect.

Then you find the hidden camera feed in the maintenance shaft. Watching the baker lady do things with a baguette that would make a Frenchman cry. It's hot in a grimy, voyeuristic way. But the game's a buggy mess sometimes. Clicking on a certain vent just resets the day cycle for no reason. Lost 20 minutes of progress. Didn't even care. The real horror is the chat logs you decrypt. The "future" they're building is just a breeding program with extra steps. The detective angle is just a flimsy excuse to be a peeping tom, and honestly? Respect. It knows what it is. A dirty little secret you poke at until the whole rotten thing collapses. The final reveal about the "incident" is so stupid it's brilliant. Or just stupid. I can't decide.

Right, so the name alone. Cum Detective. It's like someone threw a dart at a board of porn words and it landed on the most wonderfully stupid combination possible. And the game? It doesn't try to be anything else. It's a visual novel with those big, glossy CG hentai stills that look like they were scanned from a magazine that's been passed around a dorm room one too many times. Deliberately unpolished is the whole vibe. The blonde has tits that defy physics in a way that makes you laugh before it makes you horny, and the dialogue reads like it was run through a translator that gave up halfway through a sentence.

The plot, if you can call it that, has you poking around a crime scene. But the investigation is just a flimsy excuse to get to the good stuff. You click through some text, make a choice that feels completely arbitrary, and then bam, you're rewarded with a scene that's all about the sloppiest, most exaggerated blowjob you've ever seen. The cumshot is the main event, obviously. It's not artistic, it's not subtle. It's a thick, glossy mess that the artist clearly spent way more time rendering than the background. I wish there was a gallery mode to just skip to the scenes you unlock, but there isn't, and I know there never will be. You just have to click through the same weirdly translated text again. It's like the game is actively fighting you from enjoying it efficiently.

I got distracted thinking about how in old point-and-click adventures, you'd combine a rubber chicken with a pulley to solve a puzzle. Here, you combine "ask about alibi" with "stare at chest" and the puzzle solves itself. The replayability is technically there if you want to see the other two or three endings, but honestly, you've seen the money shot after about ten minutes. Who is this for? Someone who finds the jank charming, I guess. Someone who's tired of perfectly smooth 3D renders and wants something that feels like a dirty secret found on a forgotten corner of the internet. The sound design is just a single looping track that will haunt your dreams, and not in a sexy way. The whole thing is a beautiful, broken mess that knows exactly what it is.

Twilight City in this game feels like when you open Pornhub but somehow end up on Reddit’s r/UnresolvedMysteries by mistake and just keep scrolling. You’re this detective with way too much shit in his past, and the story keeps dragging you back to college, to all the messy sex and drama that obviously did not stay in the past. The killer stuff sits in the background, like some filthy shadow, while you’re busy getting a blowjob in a dorm room or fingering a classmate in the back of a shitty college bar and trying to remember if she later became a suspect or a victim. That’s actually the thing I liked a lot: the sex scenes don’t feel like someone just paused the story to say “ok, time to fuck now”. You’re flirting, teasing, asking slightly wrong questions about this red ribbon legend, and in the same scene you’re sliding your hand under her skirt and she pretends to push you away, but her legs open more. The mood jumps between horny and uneasy in a way that feels a bit too real, like when you know you’re making a bad choice but your dick is already involved and democracy is over.

The women are written like they all have their own porn search history. One girl in your class has these huge tits that clearly don’t respect gravity and she acts like a good girl, the kind that highlights her notes and corrects your grammar, but in private she’s sucking your cock under the table while pretending to help you with your assignment, letting spit run down the shaft, then licking it clean, and between moans she casually drops a detail about the killer that makes you look at her different. Another one has this big ass in tight jeans, total “don’t touch me” energy in public, then during a “study session” she climbs on your lap, grinding slow over your hardon, making you beg before she lets you slide inside her. The game really likes slow teasing, those seconds when you’re pressed against the girl, feeling her breath, she bites your lip, she pulls away, then suddenly she’s on her knees. There’s a scene in a stairwell where you’re supposed to question her about the old case, but it turns into handjob first, then she spits on your tip and takes you all the way in, gagging slightly, mascara almost running, and you still try to ask if she remembers that red tape from the crime photos. That shit made me laugh because it’s exactly how a horny idiot detective would behave: trying to interrogate and cum at the same time. Choices do change the vibe, like answering too cold makes one girl emotionally close off during sex, she still rides you but with this weird distance, and answering soft or flirty unlocks more affectionate stuff, kissing, her actually panting your name when she orgasms on your dick. It’s all animated in that way where hips move, mouths wrap around cocks, thighs shake when she’s creaming on you, so it doesn’t feel static. I just wish the text didn’t sometimes sound like it was written with one hand on the keyboard and the other inside a Pringles can, but whatever, my cock still listened more than my brain.