The engine chugs. Not in a cute retro way, more like a browser tab that's about to crash and take your whole session with it. You know the feeling, when the fan kicks on and you're suddenly very aware of how many other tabs you have open. This game, this flash relic, it loads like it's being beamed in from a dial-up connection on the moon. The creator says there were troubles in the making, and honestly, you can feel that in the bones of the thing. The framerate during the triple penetration scene with the tentacles is a slideshow. A sexy slideshow, but still.

The whole premise is a match game. You line up symbols, and if you're not a complete idiot, a woman gets railed by a growing number of tentacles. One hole, two holes, all three major ones getting stuffed. It's a fairly straightforward onahole logic applied to a puzzle game. There's this one specific moment where you get a double match and the animation skips, the tentacle just teleports from one hole to the next. It's the funniest fucking thing, completely breaks the mood, and I wish they'd left it in as a feature but it's clearly a bug that won't ever be fixed because this thing is done. Finished. The creator literally just says "have fun" and dips.

The sound design is what gets me. There's a wet, squelching loop that sounds like someone stepping in mud with a boot full of water. It plays on repeat during every penetration. It doesn't change for double or triple. Just the same squelch. I spent way too long trying to figure out if it was a stock sound effect from some ancient library, maybe the same one they used in those old Newgrounds hentai games. You could probably find it on some forgotten soundboard app. The whole thing has that energy, a time capsule of unpolished, raw flash smut where the jank is part of the appeal. Or maybe it's just jank. The women have this dead-eyed stare, like they're also waiting for the next frame to load. I complained about the loading time to myself for a solid minute and then just accepted it.

I don't know why I keep expecting these browser games to have any kind of build up. You click the link and bam, there's Motoko already bent over with Batou's pixelated monster cock halfway in. No "hello", no mission briefing, just straight to the Major getting her circuits rearranged. The whole thing feels like someone ripped a 30 second clip from a longer animation and called it a game, which honestly, it probably is.

The "gameplay" if we're being generous, is picking which hole gets the attention. You've got your standard vaginal option and then the anal route, which is where things get properly filthy. The animation loops are short but they got that wet, slapping sound that makes you glance at your door even though you're alone. What bugs me is the cumshot selector at the end. You get to choose inside or on her face, but the facial option looks like someone photoshopped a white blob that just floats there, not even following her jawline. For a character as iconic as Motoko, you'd want the money shot to land right. The creampie variant is slightly better because the dripping effect actually looks like it obeys gravity, but then Batou's dick clips through her thigh and the illusion shatters.

I spent more time trying to get the angle right than actually enjoying it. The zoom function is there but it's janky, you drag and suddenly you're staring at a wall texture while the moaning continues off screen. And the moaning. It's the same three second loop of what I assume is a Japanese voice actress phoning it in. After two minutes it becomes white noise, like a broken smoke detector you've learned to ignore. The fingering scene before the main event is actually the best part, there's a close up of her glistening and the sound design actually matches the motion, which is more than I can say for the rest of it. Wish they'd spent that attention on the anal penetration instead of making it look like a glitched out piston.

I guess for a free browser thing you get what you pay for. The character model is recognizable at least, purple hair and all, even if her eyes go dead fish halfway through. Play it once for the novelty of seeing a childhood anime crush get railed, then close the tab and forget about it.