I didn’t expect to laugh this much while, you know, also being wildly turned on. *Furry Bang Town* sounds like some cheap meme bait, but halfway through the first date scene with that smug wolf barista (he keeps pretending he’s bored while his tail literally wags), I realized this game knows exactly what it’s doing. There’s this weird mix of parody and genuine horniness - it flirts with irony but still goes all in when things get wet. The humor hits that awkward space where you don’t know if you’re supposed to cringe or moan. And the writing? Kind of broken in places, but in a way that feels like someone poured their kinks into Google Translate and said, “good enough.” It works. Too well maybe.

I keep thinking about Judy - not the movie one, but the version here who’s somehow both a cop and a futa stripper on weekends. Her route wrecked me; she teases like she’s reading your mind, then there’s this beach scene where she just drops the uniform and starts talking about “justice” while grinding against your thigh. It’s ridiculous. I almost closed the tab, but the sound design pulled me back - heavy breathing layered with seagulls and waves, absurdly effective. Then suddenly, boom, Pokémon crossover out of nowhere. A Lucario bartender offering “protein shots.” I wanted to roll my eyes, but I was already clicking through dialogue faster than I’d like to admit.

The public use scenes are messy in every sense - crowded cafe bathrooms, fur everywhere, people pretending not to watch. It’s filthy, kind of funny, and weirdly intimate. I hated that it made me feel something beyond just arousal. Also, the ending just stops mid-sentence, like the dev gave up or came too early. Still, I can’t stop thinking about that line where the pony character whispers, “You smell like story.” What does that even mean? Maybe nothing. Maybe everything. I’m probably overthinking it, but whatever - this game got under my skin in ways it really shouldn’t have.

HornyCraft is one of those games that looks like a stupid dick joke at first glance and then suddenly you’ve spent half the evening making a milky sex farm in a world made of blocks. You play as this guy, Steve, classic cubic idiot with a pickaxe, stuck in a place where every cave and house and forest has something horny lurking in it. It keeps the basic survival and crafting backbone, but everything is twisted toward porn logic. You chop wood, smash some stone, craft a bed, then realize you’re not really building a base, you’re building a fuck hub where monster girls just wander in and turn your “storage room” into a breeding corner. I liked how the first time you meet a busty creeper girl it feels like a horror game for one second, she’s coming at you with those weird sounds, and then the animation kicks in and suddenly you’re watching this shaky blowjob scene with green slime dripping off her tits while you’re still trying to remember which hotkey opens inventory.

What sticks out for me, as someone who actually cares how BDSM and power stuff is shown, is that it’s messy but not totally brain dead. You get this mix of goofy parody and real kink. Like, you’re tying up a monster milf in a stone cellar you crafted yourself, torchlight flickering, and the scene plays with her trying to bargain, teasing you, and you choosing whether you fuck her mouth or make her drink her own milk from those massive tits. The game likes lactation a lot, sometimes too much, it will throw milk on screen like a busted faucet, and then just move on like nothing happened. One second you’re milking a futa spider girl you lured in with crafted web traps, handjob plus oral at the same time, very animated, all that twitchy leg motion, and right after that Steve is cutting trees again like some boring worker in a mobile idle game. It breaks the mood, but in a weird way it also works, because it feels like porn slapped on top of a grindy sandbox instead of pretending to be some deep story. Lesbian scenes pop up here and there too, like when two monster girls start going at each other in a small wooden shack you built for storage, and the game just lets you stand in the doorway and watch, or jump in, or shove one of them on her knees. Some of the horror bits try to be serious, dark caves, creepy moans, that kind of stuff, but you know it is all just foreplay to another blowjob animation or a stacked milf villager riding Steve on a crafting table like it is nothing special. I do wish the UI didn’t feel like a half-finished mobile port and that the text didn’t look like someone typed it in a hurry on WhatsApp, but whatever, the important part is that when a huge-titted zombie girl crawls out of a hole you accidentally mined into and pins Steve to a wall, the game actually lets the scene breathe, gives you a bit of control, a bit of roughness, and does not pretend it is vanilla. It is stupid, horny, and clumsy, but I kept remembering small things like the sound of milk dripping on wooden planks or the way a shy slime girl slowly wraps around Steve’s cock after you “help” her with a crafting ingredient, which tells me the dev understands at least one thing very well: people are here to get off, not to be impressed.

Boruto in this game feels less like a hero and more like that horny disaster main guy from a messy romance anime who suddenly got handed a cheat power that strips everyone’s brakes off. Not mind control, not some magic “you love me now”, more like turning up the volume on what they already want and then watching them try to pretend nothing is happening. One late meeting with this strange hooded freak in the street and boom, the whole village turns into a pressure cooker of lust, shame and “I definitely shouldn’t be doing this but I’m already touching you so fuck it”. The game leans hard into that feeling. You walk around like in a small RPG sandbox, poking at people’s boundaries, watching them crack a little, then a lot. Hinata, Sakura, Sarada, even the “proper” types, they all feel like they have this hidden script under the skin, and your new power finds it. One moment Hinata is doing the worried mom thing, nagging you about training, next moment she’s blushing so hard you know she’s picturing your cock buried in her and hating herself for it. The game lets you push. Or not. Sometimes the nicest scenes come from being patient. Sometimes you just bend her over the table and pound her full of cum until she’s dripping down her thighs, whispering “I’m a bad mother” while still begging for more.

What surprised me is how much actual “story feel” there is between the porn beats. It’s not just walking from sex scene to sex scene. There’s this weird tension like a romance anime that lost its PG rating way too early and never looked back. You have those long talks with Sarada where she tries to act like a serious future leader, except you notice how often her eyes flick to your crotch after a certain event. Then you get that first scene where you corrupt that seriousness, bit by bit, maybe starting with “innocent” groping during training, ending in you filling her ass while she bites her glove to not scream your name. The turn based combat is almost funny in contrast, like someone glued a small classic RPG onto a corruption doujin. It works though. Beating some random threat in an alley and then using the stress of the situation to corner a flustered girl into giving you a sloppy, rushed blowjob feels way more dirty than if it just appeared in a menu. There are choices, too, and not all of them are cozy. You can humiliate, you can be gentle, you can act like a dom asshole with a soft spot. One route had me spanking Sakura so hard her ass turned bright red and she still tried to scold me like a teacher, right up until I slid inside her and she completely lost the act. Another run I tried to play more submissive, letting one of the girls take charge and peg me with that unexpected futa situation, and honestly it hit like that one weird hentai manga you secretly keep saved in a separate folder on your phone. Incest tension with Hinata is handled like a slow-burn car crash, every choice making it worse and hotter at the same time. On top of that, the AI style CG gives everything this slightly unreal, dreamy quality that fits the whole “desire is leaking into reality and nobody is safe” vibe. Some scenes are rough, some are loving, some are just trashy and fun, and the game kind of shrugs and tells you: this is on you. You wanted this.

Princess Zelda here is not the noble wise girl from the usual Nintendo stuff. She is passed out drunk on a small table like after some shitty village party, legs open, clothes still “kind of” on, and you are basically the invisible bastard deciding what happens to her. The game throws you right into it, no slow intro, just Zelda sleeping with that messy blonde hair and big tits almost falling out, and three guys already around her like hyenas. It feels like a nasty extra scene ripped out from Breath of the Wild, but more like if a horny modder went completely crazy after drinking too much. You’re poking, pulling, stripping pieces of clothing off, checking how the panties slide down her thighs, how the bra gets pushed under those tits. The sleep thing is weirdly hot and also kind of fucked up, she never wakes up, she just moans and reacts with her body. It’s like the game is saying “yeah, we know this is wrong, and you’re still clicking” and honestly, I kept clicking.

What I liked a lot is how everything is hidden behind clicks that are not explained. There is no big UI, you just tap around like some perv searching for secrets. You touch her boobs, they bounce, her nipples harden, a guy moves in closer. You rub her pussy, the panties slowly get shifted, then suddenly you’re looking at her shaved slit and already deciding if you go straight for anal first or not. That choice is funny because I kept changing my mind, going “ok pussy first, no wait, that ass is too nice, shit, go back.” There is this moment when you finally line her ass up and push in, and her sleeping face does this tiny reaction, like a half-frown, half-pleasure look, and it got me more than the full-on bukkake later. Speaking of that, the cumshots are everywhere, on her face, boobs, belly, and the game lets you overdo it until she looks like someone spilled a whole bottle of glue on her. I got annoyed that sometimes the cum doesn’t land exactly where I expected, I kept trying to cover one nipple perfectly and it always missed by like two pixels, and I still don’t know why that pissed me off so much.

Then there’s the futa thing, which is half hidden like some naughty Easter egg. You click near the bottle, suddenly Zelda has a cock, and it somehow fits her too well. Watching her sleep while her own dick is hard is a strange mix of cute and totally degenerate. I spent too long just teasing it, making it twitch while the guys still use her holes, because it felt like solving a small dirty puzzle: “how many things can be happening on this girl at the same time without the scene breaking.” When she finally shoots her load, it mixes with the other cum already on her body, and the whole screen looks like a porn painter lost control. It’s not a complicated game, it’s literally just clicking and dragging and trying different spots, but the way it’s built makes you feel like you found some forbidden Zelda cartridge under your bed when you were a teen, only this time you actually get to see her fucked unconscious and drained from both ends. I kind of hate how much I liked it.