It’s weird how a game can make you forget what you were actually doing before you clicked it, right? I opened Isekai Brothel thinking it’d be another lazy copy of those generic dating things where everyone stares blankly while you mash through dialogue, but this one… it plays dirtier. Not just in the obvious way (though yeah, there’s plenty of skin and moaning and all that), but in how it messes with your head. You start bouncing between universes like some horny multiverse courier, and suddenly you’re arguing with a half-demon waitress about who’s topping tonight. Then the game throws a slime girl at you, and she calls you “master” like she means it, and I swear I almost dropped my mouse.

The writing is all over the place - half of it’s like someone’s fanfic got drunk and made out with another fanfic, and I kinda love it for that. One scene you’re flirting with a cold swordswoman who barely talks, next thing you’re being pinned by a dragon maid who insists she’s just “checking your health.” Some of the transitions are a mess; one minute it’s sweet, then bam, full-on rough roleplay with no warning. I tried to complain about the pacing, but then a certain pink-haired girl whispered something about “rewarding loyal patrons,” and honestly, whatever I was mad about just evaporated. The voice bits - when they’re there - sound like someone recorded them in a closet, but that weirdly fits the vibe. Like, you’re not supposed to take it too seriously.

There’s a little bug where the bed scene music overlaps with the dialogue if you skip too fast. It drove me nuts, but also, I didn’t stop clicking. Something about collecting girls from different worlds, each with their own twisted little quirks, scratches an itch I didn’t know I had. Half of them act like they hate you, the other half worship you like a god, and both make sense somehow. It’s not classy, not polished, not even pretending to be - but when the screen shakes and she says your name like that, who even cares.

So this game basically throws you onto some magical anime girl island after you get horny and follow some chick with a fat ass - yeah that's literally the setup and honestly? It works. Don't Toy With Me is one of those sandbox harem deals where you're surrounded by every waifu you've ever jerked off to, from Hinata's massive tits to Zero Two's perfect curves. The whole thing feels like someone's wet dream made manifest, which I guess it literally is according to the dev.

The variety is insane though - you got your shy Hinata types, your bratty Nagatoro energy, thicc One Piece girls like Robin and Nami, plus a bunch of others I recognized but can't remember the names of right now. Each girl has their own little personality quirks and the interactions feel pretty natural for what they are. Like when you're chatting with Nagatoro she's actually being a teasing bitch instead of just generic anime girl #47. The sex scenes are animated which is nice, lots of titfucks and creampies and the usual stuff you'd expect. Some of the girls look a bit young but that's anime for you I guess? The ahegao faces during climax scenes are chef's kiss though.

What bugs me is the school setting feels kinda pointless - like why am I attending classes when I could be railing Yoruichi instead? But then again maybe that's the point, building up tension before you get to the good stuff. The mobile version runs smooth on my phone which is surprising since most of these games lag like hell. There's this whole mystery about how you ended up there but honestly who gives a shit when Erza Scarlett wants to fuck your brains out. The sandbox element means you can basically choose your own adventure with whoever catches your eye that day. Sometimes I wish there was more story but then Esdeath shows up and suddenly I don't care about plot anymore.