Bayonetta always had this “I could crush you with a heel and you’d say thank you” vibe in the original games, and here that energy is just stripped of pretense and pointed straight into your crotch. The whole thing feels like someone took the idea of a serious witch story, got bored halfway, and said “fuck it, let’s just make her ride this poor bastard until he forgets his name.” You start with the usual set up, some flimsy excuse of a narrative about demons, contracts, sexy power, all that. You can read it if you’re in a mood, or just hammer the next button like a horny squirrel trying to open a nut. There’s this fun moment where she’s mid-dialogue, talking like she owns the whole damn universe, and you cut her off by skipping the text and jumping straight into her grinding her hips down, and it almost feels wrong, like interrupting a priest. A very stacked, very evil priest who calls you a pervert while bouncing on your cock.

What I liked most is how the customization is stupidly simple but still hits hard. You tweak her hair, maybe loosen the outfit a bit more, change tiny things in her look and suddenly she feels like a different flavor of the same dangerous milf. Sometimes I spent longer in those menus than in the actual “action” parts, just nudging sliders, going “nah, more cleavage, no, even more, yeah, that’s it,” like I was sculpting a sin. There’s this one scene where her glasses are slightly different and for some reason it made the rough sex moment feel way more personal, like this was my private version of Bayonetta that Nintendo would absolutely sue over. The sex itself is straight to the point, almost rude about it. She talks like she knows exactly how pathetic you are, rides you, slaps, squeezes, grabs, and the game is shameless about throwing you into the cumming part without long foreplay if you want. Sometimes it’s actually too fast. You click through the “porn bastards” style story, tweak her look a bit, and boom, she’s already on top and you’re finishing before your brain even catches up. It’s like ordering a huge meal and the waiter just slams dessert on your table first.

There’s rough moments that feel really good in a way that’s not nice at all. She chokes you with her thighs, calls you something filthy, arches her back, and you get that rush that only comes when a character looks like she could ruin your life and you’re begging her to. I kind of wish there were more positions, or at least one scene where she actually slows down and teases instead of just pounding like a cursed metronome, but that’s not what this thing is aiming for. It’s more like a quick, nasty fan fantasy where Bayonetta stops pretending to be a stylish superhero and just becomes the terrible idea you jerk off to after too much Reddit and horny Twitter art. The parody side is fun too, you recognize the attitude, the poses, the way she moves her hands like she’s still summoning demons, except now the “demon” is basically your dick and she’s casting the same spell over and over until you give in. If you want to squeeze every drop out of it, don’t rush the first run. Play with her look, read at least some of the dirty story, then, when you feel that edge starting to creep in, kill the self-control, skip everything, and slam your way straight to the ending scene. Treat it like a one night stand where you already know her name but pretend you don’t.

Game starts in that slow, sweaty way where you think it will just be training and grinding stats with your sensei, and then suddenly everything goes to hell. Two royal looking bitches crash into the dojo, collars and heels and smug faces, and you barely have time to breathe before you and your teacher are chained up like trophies. The story pretends to be about “rescuing your sensei” but most of the time it feels like you are the one who keeps getting captured, toyed with, pushed around. Which is good. And horrible. And good again.

Every new zone feels like walking into another woman’s fantasy of power. One world is all silk and red curtains, older women lounging around like bored queens, judging your body with lazy eyes while they decide if you’re going to be a servant or a toy. Another one is cold stone, iron cages, boots echoing on the floor while some empress type makes you kneel just to talk to her. The game really loves that moment where a woman leans close, voice soft, and tells you exactly how small and pathetic you are, then uses your dick anyway like it is royal property. If you like being in control, you’re going to hate this. Unless you don’t. I tried to play “dominant” the first run, choosing the most defiant answers, and the game almost laughed at me. One milf slapped my choices away with a single line and pinned my arms like they were decoration, rode me like she was proving a point, then called it “training” with this mock-sweet smile that actually made my stomach twist.

The 3D models are messy in a way I ended up kind of liking. Tits are big but not all perfectly symmetrical, faces change expression mid scene in slightly off timing, physics sometimes look like they are drunk, yet it all fits this weird dream feeling. There is one empress with this strict haircut and huge chest who leans too close during interrogation and her nipple clips through the armor a bit. It annoyed me, then suddenly I could not stop staring only there, reloading the scene in incognito Chrome like a complete idiot. The adventure bits are surprisingly not lazy: walking through ruined temples, desert palaces, corrupted gardens, picking choices, losing fights on purpose because you want to see what humiliating thing they do when you fail. Combat is not deep, you mash through and then you lose or win, but the punishment scenes carry it. One of my favorite moments was getting captured by a “priestess” who looked gentle at first, then strapped me to some ritual thing and edged me while reciting sacred lines about male obedience, only letting me cum when I begged in a way she liked. Another time, an older queen made me lick the dirt from her heel before she even allowed any nudity, which felt oddly more intense than the full-on sex that came later. Not everything hits: a couple of zones feel like filler, one character just loops the same “I own you” line until it loses bite, and the pacing around the middle drags because you walk too long between scenes. But then you meet another cold eyed ruler who treats your whole heroic quest like a joke, sits on your face like you are just furniture, and suddenly you forget you were annoyed five minutes ago. The game keeps doing that. It stumbles, then grabs your hair and pulls you right back into it.

Revenge really shouldn’t feel this good, but here we are. You’re this worn out middle aged guy who finds out his wife is fucking around behind your back, not just once, not some drunk mistake, but regularly, like it’s her new hobby. The game doesn’t waste time pretending you’re a hero. You’re pissed, humiliated, horny as hell and way too calm about letting a witch talk you into the most petty revenge scheme I’ve seen in a while: you travel around, find every guy who touches your wife, and then you go after their girls instead. Not by punching them, but by ruining their beds and their relationships. It’s all visual novel style, so it’s all about the dialogue, choices and watching this guy slide deeper into that sweet mix of bitterness and lust. One moment you’re staring at a phone screen with a shaky hand, reading some filthy message your wife sent, next scene you’re pushing some thick ass MILF against a hotel wall while pretending you “just happened to be in town on business.” The game loves big asses and big tits like it’s a religion. Every other scene is a new woman with curves that don’t make sense, stuffed into tight dresses, leggings, yoga pants, whatever. And the camera knows exactly where to sit, especially when you’re just “accidentally” brushing fingers over a thigh, “helping” her squeeze past you in a cramped kitchen, or pretending to be a gentleman while your hand is absolutely grabbing a full handful of ass. The teasing is slow on purpose. Lots of voyeur moments too: keyholes, half open doors, a bathroom mirror catching your wife on her knees with some random guy’s cock in her mouth, and your character just watches, breathing heavy, clearly torn between wanting to scream and wanting to memorize every move. That part is fucked up, in a hot way, and the game doesn’t really moralize it. You want soft love story? Wrong address. This one spins hard around cheating, jealousy, that sick pleasure of fucking someone else’s girl while knowing he fucked yours. Or just watching him do it and saving your hate for later. Some of the scenes get straight into netorare brain poison: you spying your own wife riding another dude, moaning his name, then later you meet his girlfriend and slowly reel her in. She starts with shy smiles, then handjob in the backseat, then choking a little on your cock in some cheap motel, and the animated loops really lean into the saliva, the bounce, the tiny body twitches when she finally lets go of her last bit of loyalty. The AI CG style is weirdly slick for something this dirty. Faces have that almost too-perfect look sometimes, like Instagram filters turned into people, but the bodies are pure porn logic. There’s something funny about reading a serious line about heartbreak while your screen is filled with a huge titted chick kneeling between your legs, fingers wrapped around your shaft, lips hovering just over the tip while she asks if this is “really okay.” Of course it’s not okay, that’s the whole point. When the game decides it’s time, it stops teasing and you get right into oral, groping, and full on vaginal sex, with those short animated loops that repeat just enough to make your brain melt. Hips slamming, breasts shaking, your protagonist grabbing a girl’s waist from behind and watching her ass clap like she’s paying rent with it. Sometimes the pacing is a bit weird, like you go from a heavy emotional scene about how your marriage is ruined straight into a scene where you’re tongue deep between some college girl’s legs on a stranger’s couch. No transition, no cooldown, just “ok, now fuck.” Honestly, I liked that it doesn’t try to be tasteful. It’s horny, kinda mean, a bit sad under the surface, and pretty shameless about using your wife’s cheating as fuel for everything that happens. That petty feeling of “fine, if she wants to be a slut, I’ll be worse” sits in every choice. You’re not fixing anything. You’re just collecting bodies, watching, touching, fucking, and somewhere in between a witch is smirking in the background like she knew you were this corrupt all along.

You start out as this total nobody who smells more like a stable than a royal bedroom, and somehow you end up wearing a young noble’s clothes that definitely cost more than your whole miserable life. It feels a bit like borrowing someone’s expensive Steam account and hoping they never log in again. One minute you’re just trying not to starve, next minute you’re sitting at a fancy medieval court pretending you know which spoon to use while your dick is trying to salute every pair of tits in the hall. And there are a lot of tits. Big, soft, gravity-challenging tits stuffed into tight dresses that were clearly not designed by someone thinking about “modesty”.

The game basically throws you into this court full of horny problems. You’ve got sharp-tongued noble ladies, a redhead who looks like she could stab you or ride you, maybe both, blondes whose boobs arrive in the room three seconds before the rest of their body, and that one proper-looking girl who blushes hard when you say something dirty but doesn’t actually walk away. You move scene to scene like a visual novel, picking choices, trying to sound like a real noble while secretly thinking about what those huge asses look like out of the gown. Some scenes are all politics and “my lord, the harvest this, the taxes that”, and then you blink and suddenly the count’s niece is on your lap, breast pressed in your face, asking if all commoners are as “strong” as you. That particular achievement should be called “From Beggar To Boobjob in 5 Dialog Options”.

It looks more like a fantasy porn comic than a game sometimes, with these 3D-style images where the curves are turned up to eleven. The girls have those big round asses that stretch the fabric so much you’re sure the seams are one hip sway away from turning into a live sex show. I kept pausing just to stare at the way the light hits the side of a tit popping out of a corset. Someone clearly spent too long sculpting nipples. Not that I’m complaining. Ok, I’m complaining a bit: there’s this one background that repeats in a couple scenes and every time I noticed the same stupid candle on a table and it pulled my brain out of the moment for half a second. Anyway.

Best moments happen when the game makes you choose between being a smooth fake noble or a greedy bastard. One path, you talk nice, keep your disguise safe, slowly build romance with a girl who actually trusts you. Next path, you go full perv, corner the busty blonde in a quiet corridor, and let the “wrong” choice lead to her on her knees with her dress half off and lipstick smeared across your cock. I liked how a small choice in a boring court talk suddenly unlocks a filthy scene much later. Like, there was this time I backed up a certain lady in a land dispute just because her cleavage distracted me, and much later she “rewarded” my loyalty by riding me in a barn, moaning loud enough the horses probably got jealous. On another run I pissed her off and that whole route just died quietly, which hurt more than it should.

The writing swings between playful flirting and straight-up porn dialogue. One minute you’re talking about alliances between houses, next minute she’s gasping “fill me up, my lord” while her huge breasts bounce in detailed CG. It’s kind of funny how serious the story pretends to be when everybody is just a few lines away from getting railed. And yeah, you do get that sweet “I might actually care about her” romance feeling with some of the girls, right before the scene turns into a sweaty tangle of limbs, cum and messy hair. If you’re the kind of player who tries to see every ending, this thing is like a maze of boobs, choices and save files. My advice: abuse multiple saves like a degenerate archivist, chase every suspicious dialog option that sounds like it might lead behind a locked bedroom door, and never trust a redhead offering you wine while sitting a little too close.