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AI JERK OFF
Apocalypse 2059 v0.3
5.0 0

⏰ Added: 👁 87
The sky in 2059 is this ugly, sick orange, like somebody pissed on the sunset and never cleaned it. You play a guy who basically grew up in that shit, no nostalgia for the old world, no “remember when we had internet” crying. Just concrete bones of cities, blown-out highways, and horny, desperate survivors who learned pretty fast that a hard cock and a sharp weapon can both save your life, just in different ways. The whole thing is built around trying not to die while everyone around you is trying not to wear clothes. You wander through ruined malls that look like war museums, find half-melted billboards with smiling people from before, and then two minutes later you’re in a scav camp where some big-titted raider queen is laughing while she makes a guy strip naked in front of everyone because he lost a bet. She tells you to choose if you wanna join in humiliating him, help him, or just watch and jerk off behind a broken vending machine. And the fucked up part is that all three options feel valid.

What sells the game for me is how it mixes “oh shit I could die” with “oh shit I’m hard” in the same scene. Like you’ll be low on food, trading bullets for a place to sleep in an underground bunker, and the guy in charge says the only open bed is already taken by his sister. You expect some cliché, but she’s the one who looks you up and down, this tall woman with thighs like she squats cars, and asks if you have any “special talents.” You can brag about your combat skills, or you can say something like “I’m good with my hands.” That tiny choice flips everything. In one route she tests you in a training room soaked with blood and sweat, in another she just grabs your belt, shoves you against the wall, and makes you prove it with her tits bouncing in your face while her brother “guards the door” and politely pretends he doesn’t hear her moaning loud enough to wake the dead. It’s gross. It’s hot. It’s weirdly funny. And somehow you still care if your character survives the night and doesn’t bleed out later in some sewer tunnel full of feral mutants.

There’s this scene that stuck with me where you’re escorting a small group through a ruined overpass. Wind howling, chunks of car skeletons everywhere, that feeling that someone is watching. You can choose to sneak slow and careful, or move fast and loud to scare off scavengers. I picked fast, like an idiot. Snipers open fire, one of your companions gets her leg shot and you have to drag her into cover. She’s this smug, curvy trader who kept flirting with you earlier, joking she’d “pay in kind” if you helped her find a safe town. When the bullets stop and it’s just the sound of her breathing hard, she asks you to cut her pants open to check the wound. You kneel between her spread legs, knife in hand, and instead of panicking she starts teasing you, saying “You’re blushing more than I’m bleeding.” You get this choice: focus on first aid like a good little boy, or let the tension flip into something filthy right there behind a burned-out truck. If you go lewd, you’re literally eating her out while she winces and laughs, leg wrapped in a bloody bandage, telling you to go faster before someone spots you. It shouldn’t be sexy. It absolutely is. And somehow that moment changes how she talks to you later when you run out of supplies and she offers to “share body heat” in a cold storage room that’s definitely not cold anymore by the time you’re done. The game keeps doing that. Serious survival, then stupid horny, then a joke about pre-war porn nobody gets anymore, then someone’s brains explode on a wall. It’s messy, and that’s exactly why it works.

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