Vanilla is absolutely losing her shit over some stolen cash and honestly, the whole thing feels like a fever dream I had after eating too much cheese. One minute you're on this actually kinda sweet date with Ivy, the next you're chasing a Meowth cosplayer through what I can only describe as a horny convention center. The new second floor area doesn't even show up on the map, which is either a bug or the most immersive "you are lost in a sea of cleavage" feature ever coded.

The dialogue system got this whole revamp where character portraits now have emotions and slide around during conversations. Sometimes they slide in at the wrong time though and you'll just be staring at an empty textbox while someone's moaning off-screen. It's like the game itself is edging you. The text speed is cranked to one character per frame now which means if you're trying to read the plot, good luck, but also who's here for the plot when there's a Flygon cosplayer to rescue and an animated reward with four stages waiting at the end of the Meowth quest line. Four stages. I won't spoil what happens but let's just say the cosplayer compendium is filling up nicely with Mia and Nia added and my sticker book is becoming a problem.

I wish the status screen wasn't so outdated. It's like looking at a relic from a previous civilization while everything else got this glossy coat of "we learned how to code better." The code optimization supposedly improved performance but my brain still lags every time Vanilla threatens to have someone killed over pocket change. The maid cafe poster works now after saving the Flygon cosplayer, which is great, except I spent twenty minutes clicking on it before the patch like an idiot. The fan guide exists somewhere out there on a Google Doc, probably written by people who've mapped every pixel of this chaos. I haven't looked at it. Some mysteries should stay mysterious, like why the boss music by EternalSushi goes that hard during what's essentially a Pokémon parody where everyone forgot to wear pants.