A princess with a backside like two planets colliding in slow motion, that's where my brain went first. Not the dragon, not the quest, just the physics of her ass in that 3D render. The game, this fairy tale collection thing, it's a bunch of visual novels stitched together. You pick a story, you're a guy, obviously, and then it's like someone took a Disney movie and just... let the hormones take over. The humor tag is doing some heavy lifting because the dialogue is so earnest while a wolf is literally groping Red Riding Hood. I wish the groping had more, I don't know, weight to it. The hands just sort of clip through the big ass models and you're supposed to be into it.

There's this one scene with a witch, and the oral sex segment just begins. No real lead up, just a menu choice and then a close up of a 3DCG mouth that looks like it's trying to eat a shiny mushroom. The male protagonist never speaks, which is a choice. You're just a floating pair of hands and a dick that appears for the vaginal and anal scenes. The creampie finishes are surprisingly detailed though, a weirdly specific focus on the fluid simulation when the rest of the scene feels like a Poser model from 2006. Group sex unlocks in one of the stories, Cinderella maybe, and it becomes a logistical nightmare of clipping limbs and dead eyed stares. It's supposed to be fantasy but the only magic is how the bodies don't fuse together.

The anal sex parts, and there are a lot of them, have this rhythm. Click, thrust, repeat. The sound design is just one wet slap on a loop. I kept thinking about my Pinterest board for "goblin core aesthetic" and how none of that texture makes it in here. It's all smooth, shiny skin and cavernous, unblinking eyes. The lesbian tag is there but it's for the player's viewing, the characters never really connect with each other, just perform for the camera. Forgot to mention the big ass tag is basically the main character. Every female model has one, it's the defining feature, and the camera orbits it like a moon. The whole thing feels like a fever dream where the only thing in focus is a bouncing, polygonal cheek.