Starship discipline is completely fucked here, in the funniest, dirtiest way possible. You get handed the captain’s chair on the Cerritos, but it feels more like they dumped you in a floating frat house filled with horny degenerates in Starfleet colors. Everyone is used to Admiral Freeman looking the other way, so when you start trying to clean things up, the crew basically tells you to suck it. Half the time you’re walking down a corridor and some ensign has their uniform half open, covered in cum, trying to hide a hard-on or wiping drool off their lips after “checking the sonic shower.” The ship looks like Star Trek, but the mood is more like a super trashy porn parody where nobody remembered the part about “professional behavior.” And you are absolutely encouraged to abuse that.

The center of the chaos is Beckett Mariner, of course. She knows you can’t just throw the admiral’s daughter out an airlock, so she tests every limit she can. One moment she’s lounging in your chair with her boots on the console, tits almost spilling out of her uniform jacket, fake-innocent face and those stupid ahegao eyes when you finally snap and drag her into the ready room. The game really likes that shift from “smartass brat” to “corrupted little cumtoy,” especially when you start using blackmail. You catch her in compromising spots, collect dirty data, and then slowly push things from “get on your knees and swallow” to “bend over the tactical console, I want to see just how tight that ass is.” She resists in that playful way at first, talks back, but the art leans heavy into humiliation: tears in the corners of her eyes, tongue out, mascara a mess, expression halfway between hating you and begging you to creampie her again. The AI-style CG is weirdly perfect for this kind of parody, everything slightly exaggerated, breasts too big for regulation uniforms, cumshots overdramatic, but it fits the whole “cheap bootleg holodeck program” vibe. And it is animated, so you really sit there watching her get filled, milk leaking, mouth drooling, your choices affecting if she ends up more broken-in, covered in bukkake like a used toy, or still pretending she’s in control while she rides you and moans your rank.

What caught me off guard is how the game doesn’t just stop at “straight captain dominates bratty officer.” Lower deck kids and random crew open up way dirtier routes. You walk into the cargo bay and spot two male ensigns “wrestling,” cocks out, one already dripping. That can spiral into you forcing them to service you as punishment, lining them up and choosing who takes you in the ass, who licks your balls clean, who drinks the load. There is gay stuff that doesn’t feel like an afterthought, more like the ship is just completely horny and nobody cares about orientation anymore. Then there is the whole trap and futa angle, uniforms hiding surprise dicks, big tits paired with a throbbing cock that strains the Starfleet fabric. One minute you think you’re punishing a cute, shy communications officer, next moment she drops her pants and you’re staring at a hard shaft and a wet slit both, and the game just goes “yeah, use all of it.” You can force them to suck you, fuck them until their own cum sprays on the control panel, or take it yourself if you lean into being a greedy captain who wants every hole filled. There are scenes where you make an officer pump milk out of her huge tits right onto the floor while everyone watches, or you order a line of crew to kneel and finish them off one by one, covering faces and mouths until they look like someone set a bukkake filter over a still from Lower Decks. Then there are cheating bits, too: married officers getting reamed in your quarters, whispering that their partner doesn’t touch them like this, while you record everything for later blackmail. It’s unapologetically trashy, sometimes mean, and occasionally so over the top you just start laughing, but it keeps that Star Trek parody flavor through all the corruption, like a filthy holodeck program somebody forgot to lock with a command code.

Tony Stark finally gets to act like Tony Stark here, not the sad movie version always saving the universe instead of getting laid. You start in this obscene luxury island mansion that looks like somebody mashed together a billionaire’s Airbnb, a secret SHIELD bunker and a nightclub from Miami that never closes. The game just drops you in as the smug asshole host of an endless “hero party”, with Gwen Stacy on the balcony checking city views, Raven pretending not to care in a dark corner, Supergirl trying to look wholesome while wearing something that would get you banned on Twitch, and you thinking about profit margins while also planning whose panties you’re gonna take off next. It sounds like a power fantasy because it is, but the fun part is how messy and horny it gets when the whole “management” part starts clashing with “I want to creampie every superheroine in this building”.

One moment I was in some fake meeting room talking business numbers with Stark’s AI, flicking through contracts like on Google Sheets, trying to keep the party budget from exploding. Five clicks later I’m in the pool area, flirting with Spider-Gwen, picking joke options about web shooters that really should not have worked, and suddenly the dialogue goes from snarky to filthy real fast. It has that thing where your choices stack up quietly, so after a few shameless lines and one badly timed compliment about her ass, she still ends up in your room casually stroking you through your pants like it’s just another Tuesday. The game treats handjobs as just a warm-up, not some big event, which is kinda funny because they animate it like it’s a ceremony. And when she finally climbs on top and you choose whether to pull out or fill her up, the game actually reacts in later scenes with her being a little more clingy, or weirdly sarcastic about you not knocking her up. I picked creampie first time just because the button was bright and I have zero self control, then spent the next in-game day sweet talking her like I didn’t basically turn her into my personal breeding experiment.

What I liked a lot is how the heroines don’t feel copy-paste. Raven is cold and slow to open up, which makes it absolutely priceless when she goes from passive-aggressive spell girl to pressing her soaked panties into your hand in the training room. Supergirl acts like she’s above normal horniness, until you catch her alone on the terrace and push a bit harder, then suddenly she’s begging you to fuck her like some random fan, not a symbol of hope. Black Cat and Wonder Woman show up later and kinda blow up whatever “plan” you had, since they respond better when you act even more arrogant than usual. There was this stupid moment where I promised Scarlet Witch I’d help with some experiment, completely forgot, spent the night pounding She-Hulk in the gym shower, and then had to deal with Wanda throwing me this jealous, half-psycho magic tantrum while still obviously wanting my dick. The tone is all over the place in a good way: one room you’re talking business strategy like a tycoon game, next room you’re raw-dogging a superheroine on Stark-branded bedsheets, hoping the AI doesn’t comment. It’s horny, dumb, strangely clever sometimes, and absolutely not interested in making you feel like a good person. Which is kind of the point when you’re running a never-ending party where every hero girl eventually ends up naked and breathing hard into your ear.

Fran is one of those protagonists who feels like the quiet kid you half-remember from your own class, the one who sits near the window and pretends the outside world is more interesting than whatever the teacher is writing on the board. Except in this case, the teacher is Ruby, and she’s absolutely not the kind of woman you ignore. Huge boobs barely fitting in a “professional” blouse, tight skirt that makes you think “there is no dress code here, right?”, and that fake strict look where you can see the smile hiding at the corner of her mouth. The whole thing plays like a slow burn that someone suddenly turned into a furnace with one stupid box of chocolates. Aphrodisiac chocolates, of course, because this story doesn’t even pretend to be innocent. You’re stuck in this classroom with her, the desks, the chalkboard, that fluorescent light hum that feels way too real if you ever sat through a boring lesson, except now the teacher is trying to hold herself together while her body basically screams to jump the student she’s supposed to be tutoring.

What I like here is how it doesn’t rush straight to “everything off, dick out, go”. You start with little stuff. Her leaning over just a bit too close, boobs pressing against your arm like it’s an accident. The way she keeps pulling at her blouse because it feels “hot” inside, and the more she does it, the more the top buttons lose the war. There’s a moment where she asks you to “help her focus” and puts your hand on her thigh under the desk, and she’s still trying to solve some textbook problem while your fingers are creeping up her stockings. That’s where the game shines: that awkward horny tension, where both know it’s wrong and both very clearly do not care. Then the aphrodisiac really hits and it just turns into this messy, needy teacher who starts groping you first, kissing like she’s been holding it back for months, lipstick smearing, her breathing getting all rough. Before you know it she’s pushing her big tits together around your cock, rubbing them up and down with this dazed, hungry look in her eyes, and the shy boy act from Fran cracks into straight-up lust. The first time you blow your load all over her face and glasses, she has that shocked “oh my god, my student just did that on me” expression mixed with a tiny proud smile, like she secretly wanted to wear your cum as makeup. I laughed a bit there, it feels filthy in a very specific school-memory way.

The art does most of the heavy lifting. Ruby’s a redhead with that slightly mature vibe, not some babyfaced anime blob, and seeing her go from “proper teacher” to drooling your cock in her mouth, swallowing and still begging for more, hits hard. The groping is very physical here: hands full of boob, fingers digging into her ass, her grabbing your dick through the pants first, tracing the shape, acting surprised at how “big” it feels for a student, even though yeah, of course it is, that’s how this genre works. There’s a nice little touch where she tries to keep it romantic, calling you cute, petting your hair, kissing your forehead before going back to licking the tip and teasing you until you can’t hold back and cum again. It’s sweet and trashy at the same time. I kind of wish the classroom had more little interactive stuff, like using the teacher’s chair differently or messing around with the windows, but it just stays in roughly the same spots. Also, there’s a tiny sound effect when the chalk hits the board at one point that annoyed the hell out of me and I don’t fully know why, it just felt too sharp compared to her soft moans and wet sucking noises. Anyway, the whole thing is basically: shy male student, horny teacher losing control thanks to some dumb chocolates, lots of oral, tits wrapped around your cock, and her face ending up sticky and satisfied while pretending nothing happened. It’s wrong in exactly the way it wants to be.

This Zelda parody hits different than your typical fan game bullshit. Love in Hyrule throws you into some alternate timeline where Princess Zelda's got three other girls hanging around and everyone's horny as hell. The whole isekai angle works surprisingly well here - you're not Link, you're just some random dude who ended up in Hyrule and now these four women want to jump your bones. Zelda's still got that royal attitude but she's way more forward about what she wants. Ribo and Zaphie feel like original characters that actually belong in this world instead of feeling tacked on, and Kiya... well, she's got her own thing going on that I won't spoil.

The RenPy engine does its job fine, though the interface feels a bit clunky sometimes when you're trying to navigate between scenes. LewdSama's artwork carries this whole thing - the character designs stay true to the Zelda aesthetic while being sexy as fuck. Each girl has distinct personality quirks that come through in both dialogue and sex scenes. The harem setup doesn't feel forced either, which is rare for these kinds of games. You're not collecting waifus like Pokemon cards, there's actual relationship building happening between the steamy bits. Some of the dialogue gets cheesy but in that good way where you're laughing with it instead of at it.

What really surprised me was how much effort went into making Hyrule feel lived-in. You're not just clicking through sex scenes, there's actual exploration and world-building happening. The romance progression feels natural too - these aren't just fuck dolls waiting for you to show up, they've got their own motivations and desires. The hot scenes are well-written and varied enough that each character feels unique in bed. Fair warning though, this definitely leans into the fantasy fulfillment side of things rather than trying to be some deep narrative experience. But honestly? Sometimes that's exactly what you want from a Zelda porn game.

The first thing I thought when I opened *Lusty Buccaneers* was, “oh god, it’s going to be another lazy parody,” but then the main menu music hit me with this weirdly sensual flute loop that made me laugh and also kinda set the tone. You’re this half-dressed pirate guy who somehow keeps running into women that look suspiciously like they escaped from a certain famous anime, only now they’re way more interested in licking rum off your chest than finding treasure. I didn’t expect the story to actually *try*, but it does - sort of. One minute you’re fighting a sea monster, the next you’re having a long, awkward talk with a woman whose boobs look like they could sink a small ship. The writing swings between goofy and horny like it can’t decide if it wants to be a joke or a fantasy, and that’s exactly why it works.

There’s this scene with Nami - well, “Nami” with an extra vowel somewhere - that’s supposed to be a negotiation, but halfway through she just leans in and starts teasing you with her foot under the table. I swear I dropped my phone. The animation is smoother than it needs to be for something that’s basically porn with dialogue, and yet it still glitches when you try to scroll back during a titfuck scene. The devs clearly love their characters though; even the background girls have these tiny details, like the way Vivi’s eyes flick up when she’s pretending not to stare at you. Sometimes the pacing goes nuts - you’ll go from a group sex scene straight into a heartfelt chat about loyalty, and I couldn’t tell if I was supposed to be turned on or emotional.

What I weirdly liked most is that it doesn’t care about being consistent. One moment the protagonist is this cocky bastard, next he’s shy like a schoolboy when Boa gets too close. It makes him feel more human, even if his anatomy clearly isn’t. I wish they’d fix the dialogue box though - it covers half of Robin’s face during the best parts. But maybe that’s the point. Maybe pirates never get clean views of anything. I don’t know. I just know I kept playing longer than I meant to.

First thing, I didn’t expect this game to feel so *alive* on mobile. It looks like another parody, you know, those cheap ones where characters just move stiff and blink too much. But then I met Serena and Nemona in that first area - yeah, the one where you can “accidentally” grope if you tap the wrong icon - and suddenly the whole thing had this weird energy, like it wasn’t sure if it wanted to be a love sim or just straight-up filth. Which I liked. The small dialogue before every scene makes it hit harder, kinda awkward English mixed with moaning, feels more real than the polished stuff. And Bea? Damn. She’s got that bossy tone that made me mess up the quicktime thing just to see her reaction. She doesn’t forgive mistakes.

I got lost halfway through the story, not because it’s confusing, but because I stopped caring about the map. The sandbox thing lets you wander anywhere, but why wander when Cynthia literally drags you into something that’s part fight, part... something else. I’ll say this: the tentacle scene with the “monster” felt too much but also not enough, like the devs wanted to shock and then chickened out. Still, I didn’t skip it. The sounds alone - some wet mix of pleasure and horror - work better than any dialogue. Then there’s Nessa and Sonia showing up later, like the game assumes you already have a preference. I kept switching between them just to see the contrast in how they handle oral scenes. It’s not fair, but Nessa’s got the rhythm.

What bugs me? The touch controls sometimes don’t register during group scenes, and the camera snaps weirdly when you’re in the middle of, well, you know. But when Hilda joins - oh, man, that part changes the entire tone, like someone just remembered this was supposed to be an adventure. It’s messy, rough, sometimes too much even for a parody. But I’d lie if I said I didn’t keep it open longer than planned, pretending I was just checking messages.

Didn’t think I’d even bother with another “casting couch” parody, but WaifuHub kinda trapped me there for a while. It’s one of those browser things that pretends to be ironic, except it isn’t, or maybe it is, I don’t even know anymore. You play as the guy behind the camera, interviewing all these anime girls you’ve seen a million times before - 2B shows up all confident and stiff, Raphtalia’s nervous like she’s in a real audition, and Lucoa just… well, she’s Lucoa, she doesn’t care what anyone thinks. The voice acting’s weirdly uneven, and sometimes the moans cut out at random, which somehow made it more real? Like catching some clumsy home-recording vibe. But yeah, the animations hit that point between funny and hot. You’ll laugh when Galko starts her self-introduction too seriously and then forgets she’s supposed to be seducing you, and then it hits you - you’re actually into this.

What got me wasn’t even the sex scenes (well, okay, some of them). It’s that stupid fake dialogue right before things go wild. Meiko saying she’s “totally professional” and then two sentences later losing it on camera - it’s dumb but oddly human. I kept noticing small stuff: the sound of sandals scraping, the way hands twitch when the pace changes. The dev probably didn’t plan half of that; it’s just dirty accident magic. Though I swear the skip button hates me - it freezes every other time I touch it. Doesn’t matter though, since you end up watching everything twice anyway. And Cheelai? She breaks the fourth wall once and it ruined me, I laughed so hard I forgot I was supposed to jerk off.

Somewhere around Mitsuki’s scene I caught myself thinking about how strange it is that we build whole universes of desire around characters that started out as jokes for teenage boys. Then I gave up thinking because Mina’s turn came and - yeah. Animation’s rough around the edges, lines are bad, the logic is nonsense, but damn if it doesn’t feel alive in that broken way cheap porn sometimes does. I still can’t figure out why 2B blushes differently depending on the camera angle. Maybe it’s intentional. Probably not. Doesn’t matter.

Frank really picked the worst possible way to escape prison and the best possible place to wash up. Storm, wreck, boom, suddenly the dude is crawling out of the water into a familiar yellow square house that should not be this horny. He looks around, nobody home, nobody asking questions, so he just goes, “Yeah, sure, I’m SpongeBob now,” throws on the clothes and starts living this fake life under the sea. It sounds stupid as hell. It is stupid as hell. That’s kind of why it works. The game just leans into the parody thing completely, like a Newgrounds cartoon that got drunk, grew up and decided to stop pretending it’s for kids. One minute you’re wandering Bikini Bottom talking to cartoon weirdos, next minute you’re balls deep in someone with tits that would absolutely not pass broadcast standards. It’s all exaggerated, big tits, big asses, stretchy mouths, thick thighs, the whole hentai checklist but in this goofy aquatic world that used to run on Nickelodeon.

The tone is all over the place in a fun way. You’re this criminal hiding in plain sight, trying to remember you’re “SpongeBob” while also basically turning the town into your own personal sex playground. You can wander around, poke into houses you probably shouldn’t, get into some stupid mini-games, buy junk from shops, then somehow that leads to a blowjob behind a counter or a rough handjob in a back alley lit like a bad crime movie. The animated scenes are unapologetically dirty: sloppy oral with lots of spit, big cartoon cocks sliding between fat wet lips, pussy getting pounded while her huge chest bounces in that silly loop that looks wrong and right at same time. Sometimes it goes from silly to surprisingly graphic fast, like you’re laughing at a joke and suddenly there’s this intense vaginal close-up with her moaning like a full hentai OVA. The violence sneaks in too, not super serious but sharp enough you remember that Frank isn’t some innocent hero. He’s a fugitive who lies, pushes people around, fucks them, sometimes intimidates them. Definitely more male dom than soft romance here, even when the girls act all cutesy.

What surprised me most is how oddly cozy the sandbox feels even when everything on screen is nasty. You move across different Bikini Bottom spots, trigger crazy side events, stumble into lewd scenes you didn’t plan, then ten minutes later you’re grinding money again because you wasted it on some dumb store item that only unlocks one short sex loop. Some dialogues hit like shitposts from Reddit, other lines sound like the dev wrote them half asleep, but that gives it this raw energy. It’s not “polished narrative experience”, it’s “guy in a funny outfit lying to the whole town while shoving his dick where it doesn’t belong”. Sometimes the pacing goes weird and you’re stuck wandering around checking every door because the game refuses to tell you where the next scene is, and then out of nowhere you trigger a scene with a stacked character who rides you like she’s trying to break your spine. If there was a DLC where Bikini Bottom just leaned even harder into the corruption, with even more twisted hentai-style events and Frank losing the last bits of morality he has, I’d play that in a heartbeat. Even if I’d complain about some tiny bug in the shop UI and then completely forget I ever mentioned it once the next girl drops to her knees.

Leon is the kind of guy who pretends shit’s normal while his whole life is quietly horny and fucked up in the background. He’s living with his godmother’s family, acting like it’s all wholesome, but every time she bends over in those tight pants or sits too close on the couch, the game makes sure you feel that knife-twisting mix of guilt and “yeah, I’d still do it.” It’s not loud about it. You’re just clicking through another morning scene, fake-slice-of-life vibe, and suddenly your hand “accidentally” brushes her ass in the hallway. There’s a freeze-frame moment, a tiny little twitch in her face, and then everyone pretends nothing happened. That’s the tone here: quiet, slow-burn corruption, like you’re boiling in your own dirty thoughts and nobody opens the window. The game doesn’t rush to throw panties at your face. You get teasing looks at breakfast, her shirt just a bit too open, thighs a bit too visible when she sits at the table, and Leon’s internal monologue is this mix of denial and hunger that feels way too familiar if you’ve ever stared at an older woman and thought “I really shouldn’t be thinking this” while still staring anyway. It’s not subtle, but it also kind of is, which is what makes it hit harder than the usual “everyone’s naked in five minutes” trash.

Then it goes and adds a boxing angle like it’s a sports anime that got drunk and fell into Pornhub. One moment you’re watching his godmother’s tits subtly bounce under a tank top while she nags him about his future, next moment dude’s in a ring, getting his face rocked while some stacked milf and a feisty younger girl both watch from the sidelines like they’re already arguing over who gets to ride him first. The training scenes are stupidly good for tension: sweat, bruises, close contact, then you go home and the real fight starts, but it’s in the kitchen, with a “harmless” hug from behind that lasts a bit too long, or her pressing her chest into his arm when she pours him coffee. There’s groping that isn’t called groping, hand “placement” that’s too low to be innocent, and a blowjob scene that feels like the dev paused Pornhub mid-clip and tried to paint over it with “emotions.” You get romance, sure, but it’s the fucked kind, the cheating-adjacent, “I want you but I’m not supposed to” flavor, especially when other women start orbiting him and you realize he’s basically building a harem out of bad decisions. The drama pops up hard in these little arguments where someone gets jealous over something tiny, like a glance or a throwaway line, then ten minutes later you’re in an animated scene with wet sounds in your headphones, stroking to a woman who might call you “family” with her mouth and something else with her body. It uses AI art in a way that sometimes looks weird if you stare too long at fingers, but when her lips wrap around him and her eyes look up with that broken mix of lust and regret, you kinda stop caring. This thing feels like watching a slow car crash made of tits, sweat and bad moral choices, and yeah, I kept clicking.

It’s weird how this game made me feel both powerful and kinda dirty at the same time. You start as some faceless shinobi nobody - whatever - but then it just escalates into this fever dream where you’re the one calling the shots in Konoha’s bedrooms. I didn’t expect the story to actually *try* making sense, yet somehow it does enough to keep you pressing through. The art isn’t perfect; some scenes glitch, especially when Tsunade’s… yeah, you know, when the camera pans too close and her eyes cross just a bit off. Still, that’s what makes it feel alive in a cursed way. Like fanart drawn too fast by someone trembling with excitement. There’s something endearing about that. And I swear I laughed when Orochimaru slithered into a scene you absolutely wish he hadn’t - felt like the dev was trolling us on purpose.

The craziest part is how shamelessly it throws you into those “you shouldn’t be doing this but still do” situations. Hinata’s quiet moans ruined me, in the best way. Sakura’s got that smug energy when she flips the power dynamic, right after she pretends not to enjoy it. Ino’s scene - god, her lips, the delay between the animation loops - it’s both erotic and awkward. The mobile touch system actually makes it worse, or better, depending on what kind of person you are. Like, tapping and tracing the screen feels so wrong yet too natural. Sometimes the choices pop up mid-action and you don’t even notice because you’re too caught in the rhythm. The audio desyncs a bit after you trigger Shizune’s route, but then again, maybe I just forgot to care.

If I had to pick the top three moments worth pausing for screenshots: Tsunade sitting on the edge of the bath like she owns the world, the smoky-lit room where Tenten’s shadows wrap around her body, and that awkward kiss with Hinata where nothing lines up yet everything does. It’s filthy fantasy, clumsy and earnest. I keep thinking I’m done, then I open it again “just to check something,” and somehow lose myself in that messy, hot, slightly broken dream again.

You start as this scrawny kid who basically got fucked by life before he even hit puberty. Happy little home, mom who actually cares, then some random pirate bastards show up, burn everything, and steal her away like she’s just another treasure chest. He grows up with that hole in his chest, clinging to this “justice” idea, so he joins the marines thinking he’s gonna be a hero. Of course that goes to shit. The game doesn’t waste time pretending the marines are noble. You find out they’re corrupt as hell, they use people, they throw innocents away, and you’re just another disposable grunt. That whole part actually hits harder than I expected in a porn game. One moment you’re chasing promotion, next moment you’re watching “justice” torture someone and you realize you’re the bad guy. Then he flips the table and goes full pirate. Not the Luffy idiot kind, more like “I’ll use this world’s filth to get my mom back and have fun while I’m at it” kind of pirate.

And his fun? Yeah, that’s where the akuma-no-mi comes in. It’s this weird fruit that takes forever to awaken, then suddenly you’re controlling desire like it’s another limb. Not boring mind control, more like you twist reality just a bit and push people right to the edge where they want to be used. So when he picks up his “crew” made entirely of One Piece girls, it’s basically every horny fanfic from old forums mashed together, but actually interactive. Nami acting bitchy and money hungry but melting when you push her into a corner and make her pay her “debt” with a sloppy titfuck on the captain’s chair. Robin, all calm and clever, letting you tie her up and pretend you’re interrogating a dangerous criminal while your hands are everywhere, from her huge tits to her ass, and she’s trying to keep a straight face and failing. Nojiko with that fake tough attitude, straddling you for a slow, wet vaginal ride after a long argument where she pretends she doesn’t want it. Mozu being the surprise favorite, by the way, because there’s this one voyeurism scene where you catch her masturbating in a storage room, whispering your name, thinking you’re not around. You can walk away like a gentleman or just step out, grab her by the hair, and finish what she started. Guess which one I picked. The game loves teasing that choice thing, like a low budget “choose your own adventure” but with way more cum and way less dignity.

The tone jumps between adventure story and straight up pervy as hell. One moment you’re sailing after rumors of the Straw Hats, the next you’re balls deep in some crazy group scene with Nami, Robin and Nojiko taking turns on your cock while the others watch through a crack in the door. The akuma-no-mi lets you push them into stuff they’d “never do” in the original anime, so you get anal drills, messy creampies, tentacle bullshit with sea kings you bait on purpose, toys shoved where they shouldn’t fit, even some heavy female domination moments where Nami literally rides your face and tells you a “real captain” should know how to serve. Sometimes the pacing is weird, like you’re in the middle of a dramatic revelation about your mother and suddenly it cuts to a footjob scene on the deck, toes wrapped around your shaft while you’re trying to care about the plot. Also, whoever decided to make the main character a virgin at the start but then instantly turns him into this sex god after the fruit awakens clearly has never touched a real human body. And I swear, the little UI camera icon for voyeur scenes is like two pixels too far to the right and it drives me insane every time. But when you’re watching Nami and Robin go full lesbian on each other, tongues deep, fingers everywhere, your brain kinda forgets to complain. The game knows exactly what it is: a messy fantasy where justice is fake, pirates are hot, and every big ass and big tits in this universe eventually ends up sweating and moaning under you, or on top of you, or around you, or all three at once.

Crossunder Academy looks at you and goes, “yeah, you’re the new kid, you don’t know shit, but here, have power anyway.” You roll in thinking it’s just another school VN with some tits glued on, and then they throw you into the Student Council and suddenly you’re the class president, fake tie, fake responsibilities, and very real chances to fuck half the campus if you don’t screw it up. It starts tame, like a dating sim pretending to be serious: club budgets, school events, that kind of filler. Then you figure out every boring “proposal” conversation is basically foreplay. The shy club rep who wants more money for “equipment” leans over your desk a bit too far, blouse a little too tight, and you’ve got the classic choice pop-up: act professional, tease her, or slide right into horny territory and test how far she’s willing to go to get that funding. You know which one you click. Don’t lie.

The fun part is how it mixes the puzzle feeling with porn without turning into some clicker trash. You’re not matching gems or anything stupid like that, you’re juggling scenes. Say the wrong thing to one girl and she gets jealous when you’re alone with her teacher later, and suddenly that nice slow blowjob under the desk becomes “sorry, I can’t, people will talk.” Say the right thing and the same teacher is on her knees, glasses fogged up, working your cock like she’s grading on a curve. Some routes feel like you’re solving a horny jigsaw puzzle with horny pieces. You’re planning event schedules while secretly thinking, “ok, if Hermione-clone student nerd and that thick aunt-looking lunch lady are both there, can I push them into some exhibitionist shit?” and sometimes the game actually lets you pull it off. There are moments where the camera settles into POV and it’s just you, her big tits pressed right into the frame, your cock between them for a messy titfuck, and the sound design goes from cartoony to “oh, someone actually cared here.” Then next scene a different girl is doing this ahegao face like she’s auditioning for a meme compilation and it almost kills the mood, but you keep clicking because, well, creampie counter is not going to fill itself.

It leans hard into the fantasy faculty and campus girls archetypes. You’ve got the prim bookworm who clearly wants to be ruined in the library after hours, the fake innocent student council girl who’s absolutely into groping behind closed doors, the curvy “tradwife” type who talks about cooking and chores while riding you raw, and that one busty older woman that might as well have “MILF” written on her forehead. Half the time you’re trying to act like a respectable president in meetings, half the time you’re lining up which corridor to “inspect” so you can corner someone and see how far she’ll go if the hallway cameras are “mysteriously” off. There’s teasing everywhere, a little too much sometimes: she’s in your lap, skirt hiked up, grinding on you, moaning in your ear about how wrong it is in a school setting, and the scene still stalls until you pick the right dialog line before it lets you finally push inside. When it does click though, the game doesn’t flinch: deep throat, sloppy oral, thick ass bouncing in your lap, cum inside, cum outside, cum on her face while she’s making that stupid cross-eyed expression. It’s messy, a bit goofy, sometimes hot as hell, sometimes clunky as fuck, but it feels like an actual degenerate school fantasy where your choices matter just enough to make you paranoid you missed one more filthy route.

I didn’t expect to laugh this much during what’s basically a porn game about rebuilding civilization with your dick, but here we are. “Dickcare” doesn’t even pretend to have subtlety, which somehow makes it better. It’s like the dev looked at every crossover hentai fantasy - Velma squinting behind foggy glasses, Raven pretending she’s not into it, Tatsumaki rolling her eyes while secretly moaning - and said, yeah, let’s just throw them all in one ruined world and call it salvation. The writing’s half self-aware and half deranged sincerity; the voice lines swing between awkwardly horny and genuinely funny. There’s one scene with Frankie in a busted gym locker room that made me pause, not because it was hot (though it is), but because she calls you “hero” in this weird soft tone right before things get messy. It stays in your head longer than expected.

What’s wild is how much *sound* adds to everything. You can tell someone cared about the way a zipper slides down or the slap echoing off concrete walls. The sandbox part? Looser than it sounds. You wander, talk, get distracted by some zombie side plot that doesn’t matter, and suddenly Velma’s stuck halfway through a ventilation shaft. It’s ridiculous, yeah, but also... kind of perfect. There’s no grind, no fake moral choice. Just dirty, absurd freedom. Though, I swear one moaning loop cuts off too early - it’s such a small glitch but now I obsess over it. Maybe that’s the point: perfection would ruin the charm.

It’s funny how a game full of cum jokes and cartoon parodies ends up feeling more alive than most serious stuff. Maybe because it doesn’t care if you take it seriously. One minute you’re saving humanity, next you’re wiping something off Raven’s cape while she pretends not to blush. If there were awards for “Most Unnecessarily Emotional Cum Scene,” this one wins without competition.

Sylvara is fucked. Not in the poetic way. In the goblins-actually-run-the-place way, with their stink everywhere and those weird pheromone clouds that make everyone way too horny to think straight. You’re not some faceless hero here, you’re stuck in the skin of these three elf girls, Lea, Valya and Anneli, trying to pretend everything is “normal” while the city slowly turns into a green-skinned playground. The game leans hard into that tension between wanting to fight and wanting to just give in and get railed by the enemy. And because it’s a visual novel style thing, the pacing is slow on purpose: you wake up, decide what to do with the day, and every little choice pushes you closer to escape or closer to goblin breeding stock territory, sometimes both at the same time, which is honestly the main kink here.

What sold me isn’t even the sex at first, it’s the way the daily routine feels like it’s constantly humming in your ears. You’ve got tasks that are boring on paper, like helping in some supply room or going to “train”, but the game sneaks filth into it. One morning I sent Lea “just to gather information” in a tavern corner, and the sound layering there is wild. In the background, you have this sticky low murmur of goblin grunts, mugs slamming, chairs scraping on stone, and under that, some faint wet noise from a side room. Nothing on screen shows it, but your brain connects it instantly. That kind of sound hint is way hotter than showing every hole filled. Then when she accidentally brushes against a goblin guard, there’s this little sucking cloth sound as his hand grabs her ass, plus her tiny breath catching in the mic, just a half gasp, not some anime squeal. It feels dirty, like you’re listening from behind a door, not sitting in front of a PC with headphones.

Sex scenes themselves get pretty brutal, in a good way for this genre. There’s one where Valya gets cornered in a storage cellar after trying to steal some key item. The wood creaks when he pins her against the crates, you can hear little glass bottles rattling each time he slams into her. Her voice goes from stubborn, almost annoyed, to this broken, fucked-out stutter when the pheromones kick in. The goblin voices aren’t generic growls either; they’re nasal and taunting, with these wet lip smacks that made me actually pull one earcup off like, “ok that’s a bit too real.” I wish the footsteps on stone had more bass, that part feels weirdly light, but everything around the penetration is heavy and sticky and loud in that porn-audio way that’s hard to pull off without sounding fake. Here they ride the edge nicely. A few moans loop a bit too obvious after a while, you’ll start hearing the same “nhh!” in your sleep, but by the time you notice you’re already clicking “continue” just to hear how far they’ll humiliate her next time. There’s one quiet moment, after a long session, where Anneli just sits there breathing, no music, just a little trembling inhale and the gross slick sound of goblin cum dripping to the floor. That’s when I realized the game understands something most devs forget: silence is also a sound, and here it’s filthy as hell.

This My Hero Academia parody hits different when you realize Deku isn't getting his quirk from All Might. Instead of the usual "I must protect everyone" bullshit, we get an Izuku who's been shaped by someone way more manipulative and calculating. The setup alone makes you wonder what kind of fucked up situations he'll end up in with the girls from Class 1-A.

What really caught my attention was how they handled the corruption angle without making Midoriya a complete psychopath. He's still recognizably himself, just... twisted in interesting ways. The harem mechanics work surprisingly well here because instead of the typical "oh no I accidentally walked in on you changing" scenarios, there's actual psychological manipulation at play. Bakugou's dynamic with this version of Deku creates some genuinely tense moments, especially when Ochako and Tsuyu get caught in the middle of their power games. Mei Hatsume's scenes are particularly wild - her inventor personality gets exploited in ways that feel both wrong and oddly fitting for her character.

The isekai elements feel a bit forced though, like they threw that tag in just because. Sometimes the story gets so focused on the corruption aspect that it forgets to develop the actual relationships beyond the sexual tension. But honestly? When Uraraka starts questioning her own moral compass because of Deku's influence, that's when the game really shines. The writing doesn't shy away from showing how manipulation can be subtle and gradual. Sure, some of the dialogue feels clunky and the pacing drags during certain character interactions, but the core concept of "what if the hero wasn't so heroic" keeps things engaging enough. Just don't expect the same wholesome Deku you know from the anime - this version will make you uncomfortable in all the right ways.