You wake up in the future, dick still attached, and somehow that already makes you rare like legendary loot in a shitty gacha. Men are gone, wiped out by some plague, and the world got tired of waiting for them to respawn, so the girls built androids to fill the… gaps. Not just for heavy lifting and fixing pipes either. Your new “life” is basically being a rented toy with a human brain: if a woman flashes her account balance and a weird request, you smile, say “yes, ma’am,” and figure out later why your knees hurt. The game treats this like a normal job, which is kind of the funniest part. One scene you’re lying on a couch while some rich office lady sits on your face like you’re just another piece of furniture, talking on her phone about work targets while using your tongue, the next scene you’re awkwardly trying to pretend you don’t see a horny student girl masturbating in the dorm shower while “testing your sensors.” The tone jumps between sweet, horny, humiliating and just stupid in the good way, like an adult comedy that forgot it was supposed to be subtle.

What I really liked is how it leans into you being property without turning you into a silent mannequin. You can tease back, flirt, or just be confused like a guy who opened the wrong tab at work. There’s a great early moment where your handler drags you to your first client, this shy-looking woman who clearly ordered you “for research.” She acts all serious and academic, then ten minutes later she’s climbing on top of you, hands shaking, asking you to “just stay still and… record the stats” while she rubs herself on you, grinding and panting, apologizing every three seconds and still not stopping. The game loves that contrast: girls acting like they’re in control, but their voice cracking the second your hand “accidentally” slides under the skirt. One milf makes you stand naked on the balcony while she lazily jerks you off from behind, talking in your ear about “exhibition testing,” and you can see other windows lit up, shadows moving. It really sells that voyeur vibe, like half the city is peeking and pretending they’re not.

I wish the notifications bubble in the corner wasn’t that ugly green, it just sits there like a WhatsApp message from someone you hate. Never gets fixed. Anyway, there’s this fun tension in a lot of routes: they talk like you’re just software, but the second you push your luck, like sliding your fingers deeper or holding their hips just a little tighter during oral, they react like you’re very real. Sometimes they punish you for it too. One dommy mechanic girl literally throws you on a workbench, sits on your face, and tells you she’s “recalibrating your tongue module” while grinding till you can barely breathe, then makes you finish her off with your hand under the oily overalls. Another scene goes the other way: a lonely office lady hires you just to cuddle, maybe a bit of groping, but you end up with her gently riding you while half-asleep, soft sleep sex, her muttering her ex’s name and you can decide if you wake her or just hold her tighter and keep going. The game calls itself funny, but it’s also weirdly romantic sometimes, like with the shy lesbian android who starts off just “studying male models” and ends up using you to figure out what she actually wants from girls. There’s groping on crowded trains, forced stripping in small apartments, you jerking off because your client “forgot to finish the test,” harassment in alleys where you’re treated like a vending machine for orgasms. It’s messy, horny, occasionally sweet, and never really lets you forget you’re both a sex worker and a glitchy relic of a dead gender, which sounds heavy but somehow just makes the teasing scenes hit harder.

The main guy in Hot Property looks like the sort of dude who keeps breaking stuff in his own house and then somehow gets rewarded with more tits. That is kind of the whole vibe. It starts out feeling like a silly porn setup you see on TikTok edits, this unlucky guy suddenly getting a shot at some ridiculous situation, and then it keeps leaning into the chaos instead of pretending to be “serious storytelling”. One moment he is trying to act cool and professional, the next he is face first between a huge ass and completely losing control while two girls laugh at him. It feels half erotic, half “how is this idiot still alive”, and that actually works. The game knows it is horny trash and just runs with it. Sometimes it even trips on its own jokes, but it keeps going, like a drunk dude speedrunning Pornhub categories.

When the scenes really start, they do not waste time. You get long, slow teasing with hands sliding over those big curves, close shots of lips brushing skin, the kind of stuff that makes you want to pause and just stare. Then the rhythm jumps, suddenly one girl is on her knees, stroking him while the other leans in and kisses him, and you see the whole thing animated with nice weight to the bodies. It is not “perfect” animation, you will notice little stiffness here and there, sometimes hair moves weird or the loop is a bit too clean, but there is a lot of personality inside the cuts. Breasts bounce heavy when he grabs them, asses jiggle when they ride him, tongues slip in and out during oral, and the camera gets really shameless with low angles. There is one group scene where he is getting his cock sucked while another girl sits on his face and a third one just watches, stroking herself, and the game holds the shot on his overwhelmed expression long enough that you actually feel the comedy and the lust mix together. It almost feels illegal to laugh while you are this turned on. The lesbian bits are surprisingly sweet and filthy at the same time, with the girls teasing each other first, sharing a slow kiss, then going straight to fingers and wet thighs while he just stands there like a background prop until they decide to drag him back in. I do not like the tiny font for the dialogue boxes though, it looks like it came from some random early mobile VN and nobody fixed it. Also I opened Discord once during a loading and when I came back the music glitched for a second, like an old Flash game, which annoyed me more than it should.

The humor actually lands more often than not. Jokes about his bad luck, little sarcastic comments from the girls, weird surreal moments that almost feel like a meme edit placed in the middle of a hentai scene, like “how is this my life” energy. At the same time, the story never pretends to be deep, it just uses the plot as excuse to throw him into more trouble and more naked skin. The big tits are front and center, literally, and the game loves pushing them in the frame, having them pressed together during handjobs, smearing spit and precum on them while he tries to keep a straight face. Vaginal scenes are firm and detailed, you can see bodies grinding, hips slamming, the kind of thrusting that makes you hear the slap in your head even if the volume is low. There is this one oral scene that is honestly better than some full sex moments, the way her cheeks hollow when she goes down on him, then pulls back with a thin line of saliva, smiling like she knows exactly what she is doing to both him and you. It is horny, messy, not very realistic, and strangely charming. Or maybe it is not charming at all and I am just too weak for a dumb protagonist surrounded by horny women who keep calling him out and still ride his dick like it is their job. Hard to tell.

Valentine is not some shy anime boy with big eyes. He is this rough, slightly broken ex-soldier who now lives with bruised knuckles and bright lights in an MMA cage. The game throws you into his head right away, no slow build, no “tutorial date.” One moment you are watching him walk into a London gym, smelling sweat and cheap cleaning spray, the next moment a punch connects and time almost freezes on a close-up of teeth, blood, and that sick little grin he has when a fight finally gets good. It feels like a porn game that accidentally grew a spine and decided to care about pressure, about fear, about what happens when your body is your job and everyone wants a piece of it. Then it remembers it is porn and goes “oh yeah” and puts a girl on her knees in front of him, mascara already a bit ruined, tongue pressed against his shaft in an animated loop that honestly looks way better than I expected from a browser thing.

The sex scenes are where it stops pretending to be classy. You have blondes, brunettes, one fiery redhead with this smug face that just screams “I’m going to ruin your life and you will say thank you.” They are not just generic CGs slapped in. The camera loves the little things: a hand twisting in his shorts before she pulls them down, spit mixing with pre-cum on a blowjob, lips stretching wide around him, that tiny moment when the girl hesitates because she is still a virgin and then your click pushes everything forward. You pick if Valentine is gentle or if he just grabs her hips and buries himself inside like he forgot what patience means. Moans change, eyes change, the way they clutch the sheets or his skin changes. Sometimes you get a slow handjob next to a window after a fight, his knuckles still taped and bruised, her thumb lazily rubbing the tip while she whispers shit in his ear. Other times you go from locker room trash talk straight into a rough oral scene, her mouth full, cheeks hollowed, mascara a total mess, and you can actually see her throat flex when he thrusts too deep. I kinda hate how some of the dialogue sounds like a horny teenager wrote it, but then a single animation of a girl rolling her hips on his lap completely shuts my brain off and I forget to complain.

This thing feels like someone mashed up a trashy late-night sitcom with a horny demon power fantasy and then just... didn’t bother to clean it up. You’re this baby incubus clown who gets cut off by daddy hell-money and has to go scam a “normal” human family by yelling you’re their lost son. That alone tells you the tone. It’s not classy. It’s not “sensual.” It’s a walking disaster of bad decisions, fake drama, mom thirst, and the kind of low-blow humor you’d expect from a Discord server that should’ve been shut down months ago. And it actually works half the time. One moment you’re laughing because the MC is a cocky idiot talking big about domination and “ancient incubus arts,” and five minutes later he’s getting a titjob he did not even deserve, because the game decided his bullshit pheromones just flipped the switch in her brain. It plays like a corruption porn parody where everyone still tries to act like they have morals for about five seconds, then the scent hits and suddenly panties, bras, and standards are gone.

The whole cheating angle is handled in that “oh no, this is wrong” way where the characters say it once, then keep doing it again and again, and you’re there going, yeah sure, very guilty, while she’s riding the MC on the couch with the husband in the next room. And it leans hard into voyeur stuff too. You’re peeking through cracked doors, listening at walls, watching someone finger herself thinking about the “son,” then later walking in like you didn’t just hear everything. There’s a fun little loop with the incubus power where the more you toy with them, the bolder they get. A bit of spanking here, some “accidental” groping there, subtle scent cranked up, and suddenly the MILF is grinding on your lap “joking,” the daughter is masturbating in the shower whispering your name, and you’re pretending this is all some deep character growth. It’s not. It’s just a slow slide from teasing and handjobs toward full-on oral, titfucks, and messy vaginal scenes that feel like a badly timed punchline. The humor is hit-or-miss as hell. Sometimes the MC drops a line that legit made me snort, sometimes he sounds like a rejected Reddit shitposter trying to roleplay as a demon god of pussy. And there’s this weird mystical layer on top, like it remembers every now and then that you’re actually a supernatural creature and not just some random perv couch-crashing at a stranger’s house, so you get little bits of “training” and talk about being a stronger incubus, while you’re still secretly jerking off after spying on the stepmom with a sex toy she swears she hasn’t used in years.

What I actually liked is that the sex isn’t just “click scene, watch loop, nut, next.” You mess with their heads a bit. You gaslight their libido. You throw in some playful domination, a hand on the throat, push them up against the counter, talk filthy in their ear, and the game lets you see them shift from shy and hesitant to “please choke me harder, son.” It’s fucked up, sure, but it fits the vibe. Some of the animated stuff really sells the weight of tits bouncing on your cock or the mouth sliding down in a sloppy blowjob, and then other times it looks janky as hell, like someone animated it half asleep, but you’re already invested so you let it slide. I kinda wish they pushed the voyeurism even more, like having routes where you don’t touch them at first, just watch them corrupt themselves under your influence, walking around with that swollen ass and no panties, “accidentally” bending over in front of you. Would be fun to see them add more twisted “mystery” stuff too, like neighbors smelling the incubus aura and getting dragged into the mess, or some jealous supernatural chick trying to cockblock your corruption spree. But nah, for now it’s mostly you, your scent, some fucked up fake family dynamics, a big-ass MILF with zero chance of staying faithful, a walking stereotype of a horny girl with no self-control, and you pretending this whole thing is some kind of grand incubus coming-of-age story instead of what it really is: low-brow, dirty, often stupid, and absolutely built for people who like to watch morals collapse in slow motion while they laugh and jerk off.