Tina Armstrong in a luna park full of cheap lights and nasty ideas feels weirdly like someone mashed up a Dead or Alive mod, a bad doujin, and that one Bukowski line about “love being a dog from hell,” except here the dog has tits the size of small planets and shoots milk like a broken soda machine. This game just throws you straight into her, no soft build up, no “romantic tension”, just you, this cartoonishly stacked blonde pornstar version of Tina, and a bunch of buttons that basically scream: “ok, ruin her”. It’s like some horny dev opened Photoshop, stared at DoA for too long, and asked “what if her boobs had their own weather system?” then actually coded it. Respect? Maybe. Fear? Also yes.

The whole thing is about those tits, obviously. Huge soft anime balloons, veins barely implied, skin glossy like someone used way too much oil in Blender, even if I’m not supposed to talk about tech. You grab them, press them, jiggle them, and they answer by swelling, stretching her bikini-top logic past anything Isaac Newton allowed. At some point you’re just rhythmically squeezing her chest to pump out rivers of milk, and it feels like playing a fucked up rhythm minigame that got lost from some WarioWare clone. Click, squeeze, the nipples throb, the milk spurts in messy arcs over her abs, her face, sometimes it pools between her tits so when you push them together it all squishes like a wet paizuri sandwich. It’s gross and hot and stupid and actually kind of funny, in the way only hentai can be when it commits to one single idea and never lets go. The *** stuff hits hard though, there’s this loud mismatch between her pornstar moans and the context that’s supposed to be more violent, and my brain keeps doing that annoying moral commentary while my hand is, uh, engaged. I hate that they made her eyes look so soft when you slam into her and treat her like a toy, but at the same time that exact softness is what makes the whole corruption vibe land. Porn is evil like that.

What I like is that she’s very much still Tina. Not in personality, because she basically has none here, more like an empty doll that says “fuck me” in different tones, but her body language, the wrestler hips, the confident stance that slowly melts as you keep pounding her, feels like a parody written by someone who played DoA on a crusty PS2. She starts off like “yeah I’m a big titty fighting queen” and ends up drooling milk and cum while you hold her by those gigantic tits and use them as handles. The game even lets you swap between focusing on chest abuse and straight pussy pounding, and there’s a moment when you push her down, grab both milk-dripping breasts, and fuck them like they’re some separate creature, and I suddenly thought of Kafka’s Metamorphosis for no good reason, like she becomes only boobs, everything else secondary. That’s my brain problem, not the game. There’s humor too, really dumb humor, like the way the milk just keeps coming no matter how long you press, like she’s this endless dairy cheat code. It looks wrong, it feels wrong, I still kept pushing, waiting for some limit that never arrives. I kinda wish there was a tiny scene where she flips it and puts you in a headlock with those giant jugs, but nah, this thing is 100% about you being the bastard. And in a very trashy, horny, browser-tab-you-don’t-admit-to-anyone way, it works.

Charlie in this thing is like if some horny fanfiction writer got drunk and rewrote Star Wars from memory, but only remembered the boob parts. She shows up in that half-assed space outfit that looks like it failed a cosplay contest, and somehow her tits are both the main plot and the side quest. Blonde, big, bouncing every time she pretends to do “space combat”. Feels less like a Jedi and more like a walking pair of soft hitboxes. And it kind of works, in a stupid, dirty way. The humor is pure 2009 internet energy: stupid puns on character names, sex jokes that don’t even try to be smart, and then suddenly a threesome scene that hits way harder than the build-up deserves. I was laughing at the dumb “force-skin” jokes and still clicking like a degenerate, which is a strange combination. Sometimes you want high art. This is not that. This is like porn Mad Libs written during a late-night shitpost session. And yet I kept going.

The “choices” are that funny kind of fake freedom where you know the dev is just teasing you, but you still pause a second like, ok, do I send Charlie to flirt with the old creep space master, or do I push her right into the princess’ lap first. One click and boom, she’s on her knees testing the “dark side”, like yeah, we all saw that coming, but it still hits nice when the camera gets a bit too interested in her mouth and the strings of spit. The threesome stuff starts chaotic in a good way, like the scene doesn’t know if it wants to be a joke or a straight-up fuckfest, and the result is Charlie stuck in the middle, tits squeezed together, someone behind her, someone in front, and all the dialogue is horny parody that absolutely overstays its welcome. I liked that everyone talks too much, then I got tired of it, then one stupid gag about the “shaft” made me snort again. The princess is written like that one smug girl from your porn search history who pretends she’s above it, then five minutes later she’s riding like she invented it, moaning something about “galactic peace” while getting absolutely railed. It’s crass, sometimes lazy, kind of embarrassing, pretty hot, and way too convinced its own dick jokes are clever. I’m not proud of how much I enjoyed watching Charlie “negotiate” with the pimp master using her throat, while some knockoff Jedi wisdom plays in the background like a bad YouTube parody. But I did. And if the idea of a horny blonde space bimbo juggling cocks and stupid puns in a galaxy that looks suspiciously like a Pornhub comment section makes you grin even a little, you already know where this is going.

Slutty McSlut feels like one of those trashy side characters in a light novel who somehow stole the whole book and refused to give it back. The game just throws you on stage with her and this idiot “hero” who has the IQ of a dropped spoon, and tells you, alright, make choices, enjoy the mess. It’s half quest, half comedy roast, half hentai slideshow, which is already too many halves, but whatever, it works. You click through dialogue where every line is either a horny setup or a dumb joke, and every “correct” choice is basically you proving that yes, you also have a filthy brain. You’re not unlocking some subtle romance, you’re unlocking more angles of the same catgirl doing things that would make a priest uninstall Chrome. One moment you’re picking the right answer in some goofy quiz, the next second you’re rewarded with Slutty spreading her legs for a close-up that feels like it was ripped straight off a 00s hentai forum and lightly cleaned with Photoshop. It’s nostalgic and kind of gross in a charming way.

The thing that stuck to me is how dumb the hero is written. He’s like the straight man in a comedy duo who doesn’t know he’s the straight man, all confused while the neko girl is basically a walking porn tag. She calls him out, the text calls him out, the game itself calls him out, but you still kinda feel like he’s your stand-in. When you pick the wrong answer on a question that is obviously “yeah, cum on her tits, not on the floor,” the game flags you as a clown and you sit there thinking: fine, I deserve that. Some of the pictures look like they were drawn by three different artists who never met each other, then shoved into one episode and told to coexist. Sometimes her face looks sweet and playful, sometimes she looks like she’s been transported from a totally different hentai circle, and once she has these eyes that made me think of Kafka characters who stare too long out the window and decide to become a bug. Not in a bad way. Just weird enough that I remembered it while scrolling Twitter later.

And there is this thing, the constant repetition of her name in dialogue, like the script is slightly drunk. “Slutty McSlut” appears so many times that your brain goes numb and it stops being a joke and becomes this strange ritual. The quiz elements feel like those stupid personality tests on early Facebook where you click through, pretending you think, but really you just want to see the end card. Except here the end card is her naked, or half naked, or doing something that makes the word “nekogirl” suddenly feel too innocent. The choices barely matter in a grand narrative sense, and still you’ll rewind a bit when you miss a scene because hey, you wanted to see the version where she ends up on her knees, not on her back. Pro tip: click the options that sound the most horny and least heroic, the game basically rewards you for being a degenerate. And if you’re expecting anything deep, like character growth or emotional stakes, you genuinely walked into the wrong theater. This is the kind of thing you play with one hand on the mouse and the other hand thinking very unliterary thoughts.

The iconic TV sensation is turning into a wild manga hentai parody - this time, "Big Brother" transforms into the outrageously explicit "Big Boner". Meet Charlie, the chesty anime parody starlet who's about to dominate the scene.

This busty blonde wrecks every TV show she invades, and that’s probably why you’ve never seen her in normal broadcasts before. Other twisted characters lurk around, each more perverted than the last, eager to prove their dominance.

Watch as rivalries ignite into messy, sweaty showdowns, with only one person taking control. Throughout the game, you call the shots on who wields the power and who submits.

Charlie’s world is filled with outrageous sex acts, hilarious moments, and nonstop erotic chaos.

For endless lewd fun featuring Charlie and her crazy crew, check out our full collection.

Jump into the mess, make your moves, and let Charlie and her gang bring the heat like never before.

"Big Boner" turns the spotlight on the dirtiest secrets behind the cameras, with Charlie leading the way.