Summer with this game feels like getting stuck in the horniest slice-of-life cartoon that never aired because every censor on the planet had a stroke reading the script. You play this clueless but very not innocent dude in a house packed with sisters who are way too hot, way too comfortable walking around half naked, and way too into teasing the hell out of you for it to feel like just “family fun”. It starts kind of goofy, like a parody of that loud, chaotic cartoon family everyone knows, with people shouting, slamming doors, random dumb jokes, and the MC just trying to survive. Then slowly it shifts, like, “oh, she’s not just bending over to get something from the fridge, she’s absolutely doing that on purpose and checking your reaction”. There’s a lot of point and click poking around the house, checking rooms, catching someone in the shower, walking in at the worst possible time and then pretending you “didn’t see anything” while the game holds the camera there long enough that yeah, you saw everything.

The pace is weird in a good way. Some scenes feel like chilling on Discord and half paying attention, then suddenly you’re staring at a huge ass on your screen and your brain forgets there was a story. The older sisters are basically walking porn setups. Big thighs, big butts, that smug face like “I know you’re looking, perv, keep looking”. One of them throws out this fake wholesome vibe, acting like a second mom, but her clothes are always a bit too tight, her boobs “accidentally” pressed into your arm while she “needs your help” with something totally basic. Another one is just loud, rude and constantly picking fights, but then she sits on the couch in tiny shorts, legs wide, and the MC is just doomed. The voyeur side of the game hits hard, too. Peeking through doors, spying through cracks, catching them changing, playing with themselves, showering. The game kind of encourages you to be a little bastard. You feel guilty for about three seconds, then the camera zooms in on a wet nipple and guilt takes a backseat.

What I liked is how every sister feels like a slightly different flavor of wrong. The MILF energy one, thick body, soft belly, giant tits hanging in a tank top, talking to you like a kid one minute and giving you a look that would make Pornhub crash the next. The more bratty ones throw out insults, sit on your lap “as a joke”, grind a little too much, pretend they don’t notice your hard dick pressing against them. The humor is actually decent, too. It doesn’t treat itself too serious, it knows it’s a parody, it knows it’s about you trying to fuck your entire household during a “normal” summer vacation. Sandbox format means you’re clicking around, playing little events, unlocking more pervy angles, more risky teasing, slowly crossing the line from accidental nudity to “you’re touching her and she doesn’t tell you to stop”. The incest part is never shy. The writing leans into it with lines that make you pause and go “ok, that’s fucked up” while your hand is already in your pants. It’s messy, horny, loud, and it absolutely feels like it was built for that fantasy where every door you open at home leads to another chance to see a big ass in your face and a sister pretending she doesn’t know exactly what she’s doing.

HornyCraft is one of those games that looks like a stupid dick joke at first glance and then suddenly you’ve spent half the evening making a milky sex farm in a world made of blocks. You play as this guy, Steve, classic cubic idiot with a pickaxe, stuck in a place where every cave and house and forest has something horny lurking in it. It keeps the basic survival and crafting backbone, but everything is twisted toward porn logic. You chop wood, smash some stone, craft a bed, then realize you’re not really building a base, you’re building a fuck hub where monster girls just wander in and turn your “storage room” into a breeding corner. I liked how the first time you meet a busty creeper girl it feels like a horror game for one second, she’s coming at you with those weird sounds, and then the animation kicks in and suddenly you’re watching this shaky blowjob scene with green slime dripping off her tits while you’re still trying to remember which hotkey opens inventory.

What sticks out for me, as someone who actually cares how BDSM and power stuff is shown, is that it’s messy but not totally brain dead. You get this mix of goofy parody and real kink. Like, you’re tying up a monster milf in a stone cellar you crafted yourself, torchlight flickering, and the scene plays with her trying to bargain, teasing you, and you choosing whether you fuck her mouth or make her drink her own milk from those massive tits. The game likes lactation a lot, sometimes too much, it will throw milk on screen like a busted faucet, and then just move on like nothing happened. One second you’re milking a futa spider girl you lured in with crafted web traps, handjob plus oral at the same time, very animated, all that twitchy leg motion, and right after that Steve is cutting trees again like some boring worker in a mobile idle game. It breaks the mood, but in a weird way it also works, because it feels like porn slapped on top of a grindy sandbox instead of pretending to be some deep story. Lesbian scenes pop up here and there too, like when two monster girls start going at each other in a small wooden shack you built for storage, and the game just lets you stand in the doorway and watch, or jump in, or shove one of them on her knees. Some of the horror bits try to be serious, dark caves, creepy moans, that kind of stuff, but you know it is all just foreplay to another blowjob animation or a stacked milf villager riding Steve on a crafting table like it is nothing special. I do wish the UI didn’t feel like a half-finished mobile port and that the text didn’t look like someone typed it in a hurry on WhatsApp, but whatever, the important part is that when a huge-titted zombie girl crawls out of a hole you accidentally mined into and pins Steve to a wall, the game actually lets the scene breathe, gives you a bit of control, a bit of roughness, and does not pretend it is vanilla. It is stupid, horny, and clumsy, but I kept remembering small things like the sound of milk dripping on wooden planks or the way a shy slime girl slowly wraps around Steve’s cock after you “help” her with a crafting ingredient, which tells me the dev understands at least one thing very well: people are here to get off, not to be impressed.

Imagine if somebody smashed together Witcher fanfic from some horny reddit thread, a corruption sim, and those old Flash-era slider puzzles, then wrapped it in 3dcg versions of Ciri, Triss and Yen that look just different enough to not get CDPR lawyers knocking. That’s basically the vibe here. You’re this random guy in a twisted “what if” version of the Continent where monsters are less scary than pregnancy and everyone’s moral compass is already hanging by a thread. The whole point is simple: talk your way into their heads, fuck up their ideals, and turn the iconic sorceresses and one slightly traumatized white-haired princess into a personal breeding cult that lives and breathes for your cock. It sounds edgy as hell written out, but in the game it feels more like a slow and messy slide into “okay I guess we’re doing creampies in Kaer Morhen now.”

The fun part is how each girl bends differently. Ciri starts all stubborn and righteous, the usual “I’ve seen worlds and you’re nothing to me” attitude, then a couple of sharp choices later she’s grinding on your lap in some ruined tower, talking shit but not actually moving away while you keep pushing her panties aside. The moment when you first decide if you’ll go for bareback with her, knowing the whole breeding angle is a big deal in this world, hits harder than it should in a porn game. Triss is the classic big-tits redhead temptation package, already halfway corrupt before you even touch her. One branch turns her into this needy thing who keeps insisting it’s “just magic experimentation” while you pump another load into her and watch that spell circle on the floor pulse brighter. Another path has her still pretending she’s doing it all for “the greater good,” which is hilarious when she’s moaning loud enough that even a deaf drowner would look over. And then there’s Yennefer: the smug brunette who treats you like an insect until you finally catch her on one weak moment, hand between her thighs under a desk, asking very calm questions while your fingers keep sliding deeper. The first time you drag her from “you’re beneath me” to “don’t pull out” in one scene is actually kind of satisfying in a shitty power fantasy way, although the writing stumbles sometimes, like it can’t decide if she’s broken, in love, or just horny on potions.

What threw me a bit is how one wrong dialogue choice quietly kills a whole route without telling you. You think you’re being clever or “in character” for a Witcher-style world, then suddenly Triss stops visiting your room and Ciri just talks about training again and your cock-worship harem dream is hanging by a thread. There is a corruption meter hiding behind the scenes, you can feel it when a scene suddenly flips from vanilla riding to “press her down and finish inside,” but the game never really bothers to explain it. Sometimes that’s hot, sometimes it’s just annoying, like when I spent three runs trying to get a specific interracial scene with Ciri and a dark-skinned merc guy joining in, only to realize one early “mercenaries are scum” line basically locked the dude out forever. Also, the faces look great most of the time, but Ciri’s white hair clips into her shoulder in one blowjob loop and it drove me crazy, because everything else in that animation is perfect, the way her eyes look up, spit shining your shaft, and then this stupid hair strand just phases through her armor like it’s made of smoke. Still clicked replay on it like five times though. And the creampie shots are surprisingly good for a parody thing: you feel the choice, like, do you risk knocking up a legendary sorceress just to watch her pussy leak onto the sheets, or do you pull out and disappoint her while she pretends not to care? I kept telling myself I’d play “smart” next run, avoid the hardcore corruption, try a more moral path, but I always end up back in that same castle room, hand hovering over the option that says “stay inside her” and thinking yeah, alright, one more time.

You start as literally nobody in this thing. Not a legendary kid spy, not some overpowered hentai protagonist, just some random dude who suddenly gets handed the keys to the most chaotic KND base and told “yeah, you’re in charge now.” Which is already funny, because your MC looks more like the guy who manages Discord servers than a leader of elite child agents. The Moonbase people treat you like a mix of intern and boss, and that weird vibe feeds straight into the corruption angle. One moment you’re pretending to care about missions and debrief reports, the next moment you’re figuring out how to turn uniform checks into “strip inspections” without getting instantly kicked out the airlock.

The sandbox structure is the real hook here. You wander the base, poke your nose into different sectors, and every room feels like a chance to be a pervert in a slightly different flavor. Training schedules, duty rosters, morale stats, approval points, those all pretend to be serious systems, but they’re basically just excuses to push the girls further and further. You send one squad to a pointless “stealth drill” that is clearly just a setup so you can catch them changing into cosplay gear for a fake operation. You manage budgets, but the big question is: new gadgets for missions, or a “special” wardrobe full of tight tops, too-short skirts, and those ridiculous skin-tight spy suits with the zipper that never seems to stay all the way up. This is management like in old Kairosoft games, but horny and very not safe for work.

The voyeur stuff is everywhere if you go looking for it. You can abuse the cameras system and just sit in your office like a perv, clicking through feeds while the girls think they’re alone. Shower room, locker room, training hall, even one corner storage where two of them sneak off to make out when they think no one watches. That first time you catch one girl bending over with her huge tits squeezed into that kiddie-style t-shirt, and the fabric rides up so just a bit of underboob shows, you realize the dev cares about angles more than realism. You can upgrade surveillance, which sounds boring, but higher level cams mean closer zoom when she “doesn’t notice” she left her bra on the bench. Or maybe she does notice. Depends how you’ve been training her.

Corruption and trainer elements are where the game gets really dirty. You start giving small “accidental” touches. A hand on the shoulder that slides too low. Quick gropes during combat drills “to correct stance.” If her discipline is still high, she’ll complain and you might get punished or lose rank, so there is actual risk here, not just click and fap. But if you focus on breaking her slowly, using private one-on-one “performance reviews,” catching her in minor failures and trading silence for favors, she starts letting things pass. First she just tolerates the contact. Later, she blushes but moves closer. Eventually, you can have her straddling your lap in the command chair while alarms go off in the background, grinding her big ass into you while pretending she cares about the tactical map. That shift feels earned, even if it’s messed up.

What I like is how the game makes you juggle the heroic front with your horny brain. You still send teams on missions, manage resources, try not to get the base shut down by adults. But you keep nudging them into more “experimental” uniforms with exposed midriffs or suspiciously open backs. You invent a “stealth training” that is literally one girl forced to sneak around the base in nothing but panties and a mask, with you watching every failed roll and punishing each mistake with spanking in front of the other girls. Some scenes get really mean: you can pressure one character into public humiliation, making her strip in the hangar while other agents pretend not to watch, though the camera does not pretend at all. And then the game suddenly throws a soft moment where two girls fool around together in some storage room, exploring each other clumsily while plotting how to impress you. That little lesbian detour is handled like a side event, almost casual, and then the next day you’re using what you saw to blackmail them.

There is a cosplay angle that just keeps escalating, too. At first it’s fake disguises for missions, like “underwear model to lure enemy agents.” But then you unlock outfits that feel straight from DeviantArt fanart: bunny suit “in case we infiltrate arcades,” magical girl “for morale,” that kind of nonsense. You can assign which girl wears what, and then give “feedback,” which of course means hands on their bodies, lifting skirts, pulling straps, pretending to “check for bugs” while your fingers slide under the fabric. One time I sent a squad to briefing in full fetish uniforms and nobody in-universe questioned it, which is probably a bug but honestly made the scene better.

The game is rough in some places. Menus feel like they were thrown together after a caffeine crash, tooltips vanish too fast, and sometimes the text just forgets which rank you have and calls you something else mid-dialogue. Also the spanking sound effect is weirdly soft, like hitting a pillow instead of a big round ass, and it started to annoy me more than it should. Some rooms feel empty for a long time, like they exist just so future updates can stuff more depravity inside. But then you hit a scene where you corner one agent in the observation deck, the Earth big in the window behind her, her tits pressed against the glass while you grope and harass her until she’s whimpering and still pretending this is “training,” and you kinda forget the UI ever annoyed you. The whole thing plays like a horny kid’s memory of that old cartoon mixed with the brain of a bored adult who figured out how to weaponize promotion systems and daily check-ins into pure sexual control. It’s trashy in a very specific, very deliberate way, and it knows exactly what it is, even when it pretends to be about saving the world.