First time I opened it, I thought the colors looked a bit too clean, like candy wrappers in a porn set. But then she turned her head - Alya - and her eyes had this lazy way of tracking you, half bored, half aware you’re staring at her chest. It’s supposed to be parody, right? But it feels like the people who made it both love and mock what they’re copying. The male lead moves like he’s unsure if he deserves to be there, which somehow makes the whole thing dirtier. There’s something wildly unbalanced about how quick it switches from sweet talk to her mouth sliding down him. No fade-outs, no convenient camera cut. It just lingers. Too long maybe. Or not long enough.

The dating sim mechanics are barely pretending to matter. Tap, choose, get flustered text messages, and suddenly you’re deep in a warm rhythm that feels too personal for something you’re doing on your phone. I caught myself thinking about her hair texture mid-scene - like, how soft would it actually be after? That’s the kind of stupid detail that shouldn’t matter, but it’s there. She teases constantly, calling him “senpai” in a voice that sounds more drunk than shy. The transitions between affection and filth are messy, which I kind of adore. You can tell the animators didn’t care about polishing it smooth; they wanted it to *feel* like it could go wrong at any moment. When she presses against him, breasts heavy and animated with this exaggerated bounce, I almost laugh. Then I don’t.

There’s a scene (pretty sure it’s optional) where she insists on finishing him while keeping eye contact, and it’s uncomfortable and hot in a way only parody can be. The game pretends to be romantic, but the romance cracks open fast once things start moving under the sheets. Maybe that’s the point - pretend sweetness wrapped around shameless fucking. You could call it satire. But I’d rather call it honest.

Waking up inside a smartphone because a horny trickster god got bored with you is already wild, but this thing leans into it hard. You used to fuck other guys’ wives, now you’re literally trapped inside their husbands, riding along in their bodies like a cursed passenger. You feel what they feel, see what they see, and you’re stuck with their hard-ons, their guilt, their shitty life choices. Loki basically turned you into a pervy parasite and then sits there laughing while you try not to lose your mind every time some big titty wife bends over in front of “you”. It’s not subtle. It’s not gentle. It’s that kind of story where the universe kicks you in the balls and then asks if you liked it.

The pace is weird in the best way. Sometimes you’re just scrolling messages and photos, swiping through this guy’s life, then suddenly the wife walks in wearing nothing but a towel that barely holds her big ass, drops it “by accident”, starts teasing him like she’s bored and horny at the same time. You’re inside his head, feeling the heat climb, his cock getting hard under the table while she pretends it’s no big deal, sucking on a popsicle right in his face like a joke that goes too far. There’s this nasty, delicious corruption vibe, because half the time you’re pushing him to give in, whispering in his thoughts, “Touch her, go on, fuck her, she wants it”, and the other half you’re actually panicking, because you know some of these women are already being fucked behind his back by someone else. Or they will. Loki keeps hinting, poking, showing you clips, screenshots, little details that make you question everything. The netorare sting isn’t a sudden shock, it crawls under your skin. You see a lipstick mark that shouldn’t be there, a chat icon popping up a bit too often, a photo angle that screams “someone else took this”. You’re still jerking off in your own head when you realize you’re probably not the only one tasting her tonight.

What really got me is how horny it stays even when it gets mean. You’ve got slow, intimate scenes where she sits on his lap and grinds on him through thin panties, whispering soft romance shit in his ear, kissing his neck, guiding his hands under her top, making him feel her huge tits while she bites her lip. Then suddenly she’s on her knees, sucking him off messy, drool on her chin, eyes staring up like she’s in love and also in total control. The AI CG stuff has that slightly unreal polish, but in a good way, like you’re watching a fantasy that became just real enough to hurt. Vaginal, oral, stripping piece by piece, teasing until you want to scream at the screen. And you’re not actually “doing” anything, it’s a kinetic story, so your only job is to watch this guy live the life you deserved and kind of hate him for it, while Loki treats you like a pet he toys with. The worst part is that it works. One moment you’re melting when she cuddles up, saying she’s scared to lose him, the next your gut twists because something she says doesn’t match, and you know you’re being played from both sides. It’s horny, cruel, funny in that “I shouldn’t be laughing, but I am” way. Dare to play it alone, or invite company?

World looks normal for like five seconds, then a goddess is throat-deep on some drunk guy in a dirty alley and a slime girl is pretending to be a bus stop. That’s the kind of vibe here. You’re the screwed-up youngest kid from this fancy sorcerer bloodline, raised like some expensive pet in a cage while dad plays “ancient destiny” dictator. You finally say “fuck this,” walk out, and crash right into a city where deities are cheating on mortals, monster girls are trying to pass for regular bar hoes, and everyone’s lying about what they are. It’s not subtle. One minute you’re sipping cheap beer, next minute you’re holding a demon girl by the horns while she’s riding you slow on a couch that still has plastic on it, moaning about how your bloodline tastes different while you’re trying to remember the spell to not blow your load too fast. Didn’t work for me, by the way.

What I really liked is how the lewd stuff just happens in between all the weird supernatural drama. You go talk to this “quiet, shy” girl in the library, and the second you notice her shadow moving out of sync you know shit’s about to get freaky. Few lines of flirting, a bit of awkward groping in the stacks, and suddenly her skin splits like a zipper and she’s got scales running up her spine, huge tits pressed against you, tongue way too long to be human sliding in your mouth. She insists you keep going even when your hands are shaking, and when you finally push her against the shelf and slide in raw, the game really leans into it: her claws on your back, wet sounds in your headphones, her whispering about how “human seed feels different” right before you dump a creampie that literally glows inside her. Then she zips herself back into “normal girl” mode and asks if you’ve done the homework. I opened Telegram in the background just to rant at a buddy about it, then remembered I’m not supposed to talk about this game with anyone and just sat there laughing like an idiot.

There’s this club scene where the pacing goes totally off the rails but in a fun way. You think it’s normal stripping: girl with big tits grinding on your lap, teasing your cock through your pants, licking your ear, that usual horny-night type of thing. Then the lights flicker red, her eyes go all void-black, and suddenly you’re in a half-ritual, half-orgy where three women are around you, each not quite human, each wanting your “family magic” inside them. One’s a monster girl with a mouth inside her thigh, another is a goddess pretending she’s just there for the music, and the third one is basically lesbian as hell but decides your tongue is good enough as a temporary toy before she focuses on the others. You’re switching between eating one out while another one deepthroats you, then getting pulled into group sex where they pass your dick like a joint, sloppy oral, spit mixing with that thick white mess when one of them jerks you right into another girl’s pussy without warning. The game doesn’t even pause to ask if you want to pull out. You just watch the cum drip out of her while she smirks and murmurs some spell that probably means trouble later. And I actually tried to roleplay the “responsible romance route” at first, which was adorable and completely pointless, because ten minutes later I was banging a deity in a bathroom stall while a monster outside the door pretended to be a broken hand dryer.

Arabian Nights vibe but horny and kind of dumb in a good way. That is Exiles for me. You start as this broke orphan in Dumat al-Julfar, doing the servant grind, and the game just throws you into this messy mix of “save the world” and “oops I accidentally saw my mistress naked in the bathhouse” energy. It jumps from serious plot to lewd chaos so fast that at first I thought I misclicked a Ren’Py skip or something. One moment you’re getting lectured about loyalty and duty, next moment you’re pinned against a silk curtain while your patron’s spoiled daughter decides she’s tired of using her fingers and wants your tongue instead. It doesn’t ask if you’re ready for that shift, it just does it. And somehow it works. Kind of like the oldschool era when people played CoC on their school laptop during “homework” and pretended it was just text based RPG.

What I really like is how the scale slowly creeps up. You start cleaning floors and carrying trays in this rich merchant’s house and you think “ok harem sim in fake Arabia, I know this drill” and then suddenly the whole thing opens up into sea travel, cold lands, strange gods, and you’re still the same idiot who gets distracted by cleavage during a world ending prophecy. There was a scene on the ship where a storm is going crazy, crew is panicking, and your main love interest is like “if we die I want to feel you inside me at least once” and she drags you behind some cargo. Wind, rain, her trying to keep quiet while riding you, while the captain is shouting orders on the deck above. That one stuck in my brain. Then later, way north, you’re in some snow covered temple with a warrior priestess, and the dev just goes “yeah, sure, blowjob in front of a half frozen altar, why not”. It has that horny teenager energy but written by someone who actually reads books and still remembers how to be stupid.

The game doesn’t polish itself clean, which I respect. Some pacing is all over the place. You get this nice, slow teasing with your patron, all flirting and almost touching, and then the next girl you meet basically climbs you like a tree after two dialog choices and I was like “ok, calm down, at least pretend you know my name”. Some scenes feel like they were written after too much coffee and then never edited. There’s this bit where you’re talking about the fate of the world and it suddenly turns into a long rant about the price of dates in the market, and I still don’t know if that was supposed to be funny or just leftover draft. Also the UI for backtracking certain choices feels slightly annoying. Not broken, just that tiny itch, like the kind where you keep misclicking on mobile Pornhub because the banner jumps. But the characters carry the whole thing. The shy scholar girl who looks like she’d faint if you say “cock” out loud, then ends up riding your face in a dusty library while you’re supposed to study magic. The icy northern warrior who looks like she’ll gut you, then can’t stop shaking when you finally get her out of that armor and she begs you to go rougher. The game plays like a long term relationship with a very chaotic person: lots of fun sex, a few groan moments, sometimes you roll your eyes, and then it hits you with a scene so hot or so sweet you forgive everything without even trying.