The village is burning, everybody screams about prophecy and clan wars, and you’re just there with your dick in your hand, realizing your family was hiding the wildest shit from you for generations. That is basically the feeling here. One second you are this “normal guy,” next second some ancient enemy shows up, kidnaps half the ninja world, and you find out that the only way to fix anything is to run around a big messy sandbox full of horny kunoichi who all, for some reason, need your cock more than therapy. It starts almost like a joke. You meet Hinata and she is shy, gentle, blushing, doing that soft eye thing while hinting that she is ready to “help” with your training. Two scenes later you’re getting your soul sucked out by her in a storage room while her husband is technically part of the plot somewhere out there. The game just goes “yeah, that’s a problem, but also look at her lips” and honestly I respect that.

What really hits is how it mixes this “hero must save everyone” story with the dirtiest family and village drama. You jump from Milf Tsunade grinding on you in some half-serious “medical exam,” to Sarada pretending she only wants to learn combat, then suddenly she is on her knees, drooling on your shaft in an alley while you keep checking if anyone is watching. The voyeur thing keeps coming back in small ways, like catching Temari touching herself through her shorts when she thinks no one is around, or spying on Mikoto in the bath, water sliding off her tits while she stares into distance like she already knows she is going to end up bent over for you anyway. Then the game hits you with loli stuff like Himawari or Hanabi looking way too eager to prove themselves and you sit there thinking, “ok, I am going to hell,” but you keep clicking. There is this one route where you corrupt a virgin girl so slowly, with teasing, little gropes, “accidental” touches during combat training, that by the time you finally go deep inside her she is begging you to breed her like you did to her mom. It is wrong on like ten levels and still hot as fuck.

The whole thing is also weirdly funny. Half the time it feels like a parody of the original series, like when Anko turns a serious mission briefing into a blowjob under the table, or when Karin keeps pretending she cares about “bloodlines” right before letting you rail her raw, talking about making the strongest baby while you are already cumming in her. One moment you’re involved in this heavy clan plot, with enemies, old grudges, revenge, and in the next scene Chocho jumps on you, riding you like some cheap motel toy, saying she deserves “main heroine” treatment. There is cheating everywhere, husbands and dads in danger while their wives and daughters moan your name. Sakura choking on your cock, Kurenai acting like a proper teacher until she spreads her legs and asks you to fill her just so she can “understand the corruption.” The game never really pretends to be moral. It just lets you stack a full harem of milfs, teens, lolis, Uzumaki redheads, Uchiha princesses, the whole village basically, and slowly turn them into your personal breeding toys, one by one, with vaginal, anal, oral, messy cumshots, pregnancy talk, the whole package. Every route feels like another bad ending for them and a secret happy ending for you, and if that sentence makes you smile even a little, yeah, this thing is made exactly for you.

So this game basically throws you onto some magical anime girl island after you get horny and follow some chick with a fat ass - yeah that's literally the setup and honestly? It works. Don't Toy With Me is one of those sandbox harem deals where you're surrounded by every waifu you've ever jerked off to, from Hinata's massive tits to Zero Two's perfect curves. The whole thing feels like someone's wet dream made manifest, which I guess it literally is according to the dev.

The variety is insane though - you got your shy Hinata types, your bratty Nagatoro energy, thicc One Piece girls like Robin and Nami, plus a bunch of others I recognized but can't remember the names of right now. Each girl has their own little personality quirks and the interactions feel pretty natural for what they are. Like when you're chatting with Nagatoro she's actually being a teasing bitch instead of just generic anime girl #47. The sex scenes are animated which is nice, lots of titfucks and creampies and the usual stuff you'd expect. Some of the girls look a bit young but that's anime for you I guess? The ahegao faces during climax scenes are chef's kiss though.

What bugs me is the school setting feels kinda pointless - like why am I attending classes when I could be railing Yoruichi instead? But then again maybe that's the point, building up tension before you get to the good stuff. The mobile version runs smooth on my phone which is surprising since most of these games lag like hell. There's this whole mystery about how you ended up there but honestly who gives a shit when Erza Scarlett wants to fuck your brains out. The sandbox element means you can basically choose your own adventure with whoever catches your eye that day. Sometimes I wish there was more story but then Esdeath shows up and suddenly I don't care about plot anymore.

You’re this freshly graduated hero kid at U.A., but it doesn’t feel like shiny heroic future at all. It feels like hanging backstage in a strip club dressing room, still in costume, still sweating glitter, but the show’s over and now all the real shit happens. Principal gives you this “secret mission” and smiles like a manager who knows damn well you’re going to break every rule he just pretended to explain. Your quirk is stupid strong, perfect for fighting villains… or for peeking, teasing, touching where you really, absolutely, totally shouldn’t.

The whole thing plays like a messy dating sim and a sandbox had a baby with a horny fanfic. One moment you’re walking around the school corridors, same old U.A. uniforms and doors and boring hero talk. Next thing, you’re alone on a training field with Ochaco, she’s stretching, her shirt riding up, and the camera just loves her tits and that ass. She’s talking about becoming a pro hero, and in my head I’m already planning a burlesque routine: pink lights, zero gravity pasties, her floating slowly out of her clothes while the crowd loses its mind. The game lets you be polite and romantic, or you just… lean in, test the waters, “accidentally” brush against her curves and see how far your quirk and a bit of groping can go before she blushes or snaps.

Then there’s Jiro, and I swear I misremembered her name twice while playing, I kept calling her “Kyomi” in my notes. She’s this cool, low-key girl, headphones, attitude, but the way the scenes are drawn, you can’t miss how soft she looks under the punk vibe. I had this idea in my head of a slow striptease to bass-heavy rock, her jack plugs trailing down like suspenders, but the game goes instead for something more intimate. Tiny room, lights low, her teasing you with that deadpan sarcasm while your hands travel way too far under her clothes. It’s not subtle. Nothing here is subtle. And still, sometimes the pacing drags, like when you’re trying to find the right place to click in the sandbox and you just want to skip straight to Midnight bending over a desk in that skin-tight latex, giving “teacher-student conference” a whole different meaning. I swear I spent longer looking for one dialogue trigger than I ever spent rehearsing a fan dance.

Mirko is a whole different beast. Literally. I see her and my brain goes “this is not a hero, this is a headliner in a rabbit-themed cabaret.” Those muscles, those thighs, those ears, that attitude. In my routine version she’d stomp on stage, grab a chair, sit on it backwards and grind on it like it owed her rent. In the game, when you finally get a private moment with her, the vibe is wild and physical. She teases you, calls you out, gets in your face. You try to keep it romantic and the script almost lets you… then the art just zooms straight into her big tits and tight ass and suddenly romance is wrestling. I loved it and still kinda hated how fast things escalated, but anyway. Rumi doesn’t do half-measures.

The voyeurism angle sneaks up on you. First it’s “oops, you walked past the changing room at the wrong time”, then later you’re lingering on windows, peeping at shower steam and silhouettes, heartbeat racing like you’re doing something very illegal. And you are, to be honest. Some scenes feel like you’re the pervy stagehand watching from behind the curtains while the girls change costumes, not knowing you’re there. As a dancer, I got this weird guilty thrill, because it really captures that feeling of eyes on skin, of power in being looked at… even if here the player is the one stealing the look. There is romance, cute moments, walking through the school talking about futures and dreams, and somehow five minutes later your hands are full of big tits or you’re pressing some flustered, wide-eyed girl against the wall and whispering what you want to do to her.

The art is pure 2D fan-fantasy, not “professional anime studio” level but dirty enough to feel fun. Sometimes a pose looks a little off and I laughed, then two clicks later I’m staring at Mirko’s sweaty abs like I never saw abs before. The game lets you flirt, grope, push your luck, and your quirk becomes this excuse for every bad thought you ever had while watching the show. Is it refined? No. Parts feel awkward, some dialogues made me roll my eyes, and I still don’t know why one scene with Kendo broke on me and sent me back to the hallway like I’d been kicked out of the club for touching the dancer. But then I see Midnight leaning over, breasts about to spill, playful smile promising trouble, and suddenly I forgive a lot. Not everything. But a lot.

First thought when this thing loaded was basically “ok, this looks kinda jank… but I’m curious” and yeah, that sums it up. It feels like somebody really horny and slightly drunk decided to mash Demon Slayer waifus and a dating sim in one weekend, and somehow it works better than it should. You’re not grinding demons here, you’re grinding affection bars and lewd scenes, talking your way into the pants of Shinobu, Nezuko, Kanao, Mitsuri, Daki, Tamayo and a few others the dev clearly has bookmarked in his Rule34 folder. It plays like a visual novel with some light sim stuff stapled on: you click through scenes, make choices, pick where to spend time, watch numbers go up, unlock another scene where a “pure” girl suddenly rides you like she’s been training for it. Totally classy. Totally not classy at all.

What surprised me is how each girl has her own vibe, even though the game is pretty scuffed. Shinobu goes from teasing “ara ara, you’re kinda cute” into straight-up talking about how she wants to milk you until you can’t stand. Nezuko’s route leans into that quiet, needy thing: lots of blushing, sucking, licking, her climbing in your lap like a cat in heat. Kanao starts super shy, barely talking, and then there is this moment where you finally break through her coin-flip bullshit and she decides, with this tiny smile, that she’s going to “devote herself” to you. Two scenes later she’s on her knees, eyes glassy, letting you cum on her face, and the script doesn’t even pretend it’s about romance anymore. Mitsuri is just horny from the start and I respect that. She goes from “I really like strong men” to “please fuck me until I can’t walk” in like three dialog boxes. Daki is straight-up toxic, which is hot: she insults you, treats you like trash, then moans when you pull her hair and pound her so hard her demon composure breaks. Tamayo is the gentle one, but of course she ends up on a table, skirt pushed up, letting you take out “stress” on her while she tries to stay composed and fails. The whole thing swings from romantic to filthy in seconds, and it feels wrong in a fun way.

The actual game part is simple as hell. You pick spots, talk, give gifts, answer horny or sweet, watch affection rise, unlock another scene where clothes magically vanish. There’s no deep stat management, just enough clicks so it doesn’t feel like a pure gallery. Sometimes the pacing is weird: a long dialogue about feelings, then the next choice is basically “do you want to fuck her now or fuck her harder later” and of course you pick both. I liked one moment with Shinobu where you end up in a quiet room in the butterfly mansion, she’s fake-innocent, leaning closer with that smug smile, then the text hits you with her whispering what she wants you to do to her tongue, and suddenly this hentai Android game in my browser feels way dirtier than it looks. Another time with Nezuko, the CG opens and she’s bent over, drool on the floor, and the game just casually describes how she pushes her hips back, begging without words. Honestly I wish some scenes were longer, but also I don’t, because the short, punchy lewd moments keep you clicking for “just one more” like a degenerate. It’s rough, unpolished, sometimes cheesy, but when Mitsuri is bouncing on your cock, tears in her eyes, babbling about how she loves you and your “thick human cock”, you kinda forget it ever looked scuffed at all.