Grand Butt-Sex Hotel feels like the kind of game teenage me always dreamed about finding on some shady Flash site, except now it actually runs smooth on my phone and doesn’t crash when the good part starts. You play this kinda hapless dude who walks into this fancy hotel thinking “oh cool, job, money, normal life maybe” and instead you get thrown into a place where the managers and guests are mostly tall smug futa ladies with thick thighs, huge tits and way too much money, who look at you like you’re a walking stress toy. The whole vibe is luxury mixed with porn parody, like someone mashed a five-star resort with one of those cursed hentai doujins you pretend you “found by accident”. You’re basically staff and chew-toy at the same time. One second you’re talking politely at the front desk, the next a classy futa businesswoman is pushing you against the counter and making you suck her cock while the elevator dings in the background. The game treats that as completely normal, which is honestly kinda funny and hot at same time.

What really hit my nostalgia brain is how the humor and horny stuff are glued together. The dialogue is full of dumb jokes, weird “rich people fetish” lines, and that slightly awkward English that somehow makes the dirty talk work better. There’s this scene where a petite “trap” guest shows up looking cute and shy, then calmly pulls out a suitcase full of toys and asks if you’re “hotel-certified” for anal service, like it’s spa menu item. You get the dating sim vibe, picking how polite or thirsty your responses are, and it actually changes how hard they ride you later. One futa with a giant ass teases you for being “vanilla” if you only go for oral, then drags you to her room, bends you over the bed and you feel like you’re signing a contract with your asshole. Some of the animations are nicely timed with the moans, especially the oral shots where your head is bobbing and her balls tap your chin, but then sometimes a loop will reset at a weird moment and my brain just goes “why did her hips teleport”. And the loading between scenes on mobile Chrome lagged right during a blowjob payoff, which annoyed me more than it should, but I still kept playing, because of course I did.

The hotel setting lets them throw in all kinds of guests: tall dark-skinned futa with big tits who treats you like a room amenity, some smug white CEO type who wants you on your knees under the table during “business calls”, a nerdy girl with glasses who secretly has the thickest cock and uses a vibrating toy in your ass while she scrolls on her phone, barely looking at you. There are races mixed, body types, a lot of big asses pressing you into fancy sheets. Sometimes the female domination goes pretty hard, like humiliating dirty talk while they make you lick their shaft clean after anal, and other times it’s oddly sweet, like a futa patting your head after using you and tipping you like a good bellboy. It’s funny, because the game pretends to be this outrageous fetish buffet, but the thing that stuck with me most was one quiet moment in a hallway, where you’re exhausted, cum probably still dripping somewhere, and a guest just smirks, adjusts her bulge, and tells you she booked you for “wake-up service” tomorrow. That tiny little line hit way harder in my head than half the loud scenes. Also, the hotel lobby music slaps in the weirdest way. I caught myself humming it while opening TikTok, which is completely wrong for this kind of game and now my brain is cursed forever.

Takuro landing in Saint Arcadia feels like someone dropped a horny shonen protagonist into a hentai visual novel and forgot to give him a filter. It’s this “nice transfer guy” vibe on the surface, but the whole school is basically a pressure cooker of thirsty girls, teachers, and those strict student council types pretending they care about discipline while they’re secretly dripping. The game doesn’t even waste much time pretending to be innocent. One minute you’re sitting in this prim classroom with all the usual school crap, next minute the class rep is locking the door and explaining the rules of her “oral exam” with her mouth full. And yeah, his “special power” is exactly what you think it is: he fucks like he’s min-maxed a sex stats spreadsheet in a JRPG, and the girls treat it like a rare resource to capture or abuse.

What hit me is how fast it slides from goofy wish-fulfillment into this twisted power game. You’ve got the dom girls who put a collar on him, tie him up and make him cum just with toys and dirty whispering, like they’re trying to prove they own his dick. Then on another route there’s blackmail, where he suddenly flips the script, uses some secret he finds out, and you get that messed up “you thought you were in control, now open your legs and beg for it” vibe. One run I ended up in a clubroom scene with two girls going down on him at the same time, playing this cruel little game where one deepthroats, the other licks his ass, and they argue who can make him shoot harder. The voices there really help, they moan and gasp in that shameless Japanese way, panting through multiple penetrations, and yeah, sometimes the fake sobbing is a bit much, I had to mute my speakers and swap to headphones on my phone like I’m hiding porn from my own walls. There is also this weirdly hot scene where a teacher makes him “study after class,” riding him in the empty classroom, tits bouncing on his face while she worries about being seen, but still keeps fucking him harder.

The exhibition stuff is where it gets extra filthy. Like that moment in the hallway where a girl is jerking him off behind a pillar, classmates walking by, and she insists he can’t cum until someone looks in their direction. Or the rooftop scene where she sits on his cock, skirt pulled up, panties pushed aside, pretending to talk about homework while he’s fucking her from behind and she’s trying not to moan too loud. There’s even a sleep sex bit that honestly made me pause: him sliding his fingers into a sleeping girl’s pussy, then slowly pushing his cock in while she’s half-awake, mumbling his name, not really pushing him away either. The game doesn’t moralize, it just goes “yeah, this is happening” and moves on. Anal shows up less than I expected, but when it does, it’s usually tied to some “punishment” scene from a dominant girl, making him lick her pussy first, then ramming his cock into her ass while she calls him her toy, which is hilarious because he’s the one with the super dick. The only thing that annoyed me is one line in the UI they never translated properly, just sits there in Japanese and every time I see it I get slightly pissed, then immediately forget because someone is bouncing on his lap and screaming his name again.

This thing throws you right into Luna’s brain like she just walked out of some cute fairy anime and then got slapped in the face with Pornhub. She lands in this sleepy little village that looks all soft and cozy at first, flowers everywhere, people smiling too much, that fake kind of wholesome you see in small town Instagram pics. Then you start talking to folks and realize half the town is backed up and horny and the other half is busy pretending sex doesn’t exist, and you’re basically hired as the official “please fuck everyone before the world breaks” girl. Luna’s this tiny fey girl with huge eyes and a body that absolutely doesn’t match her clueless personality, big tits bouncing when she runs around doing “quests” that are really just setups for sex scenes pretending to be favors. It goes from cute to filthy in like three clicks, and the shift actually works, because she never really stops being sweet even when she’s covered in cum and asking who’s next.

What surprised me is how the game mixes the management stuff with the actual porn. You’re not just clicking through dialog to reach a CG. You’re checking Luna’s lust vs restraint, choosing if she plays hard to get or just drops to her knees the moment someone even hints at wanting a blowjob. I had one scene where she went to “comfort” this nervous girl from the celibacy cult, and depending on your stats it either stays soft with tender kissing and slow, shivery groping or it flips into Luna pushing the girl against the wall and making her whimper while she eats her out. The lesbian content is honestly the best part here, the dev clearly likes women actually enjoying themselves, not just moaning for the camera. There’s this one bit with a monster girl who’s way taller than Luna, thick thighs, big ass, extra limbs doing their own thing, and Luna’s just hanging off her like a toy while getting absolutely stuffed. It looks ridiculous and hot at the same time, especially when the monster girl keeps teasing her, holding her just out of reach of orgasm until Luna’s begging and drooling and promises to be a “good village toy.” I thought I’d hate the corruption angle, but watching Luna slowly go from “oh my, is this okay?” to casually asking if someone wants their pussy or their ass first kind of sneaks up on you, and suddenly the innocent fairy girl is the one pushing sex toys into cult ladies and telling them they’ll sleep better with a creampie.

The tone jumps all over the place, in a good way and also in a “what the fuck are we doing” way. One scene is goofy, like Luna streaking across a field because some pervy shrine spirit only listens to naked people, and she’s half embarrassed and half giggling while villagers pretend not to stare. Next scene there’s this dark church basement where lust is literally warping reality, and you’ve got tentacly shapes hugging her thighs, sliding under her clothes, making her moan and blush while she’s trying to look brave. The game keeps teasing exhibitionism, like Luna getting used to people watching her, breasts out, ass grabbed, someone’s tongue in her mouth while another hand pushes her thighs apart. Then later you bump into a stupid little issue like the UI hiding half a dialogue choice and it annoys the hell out of you, but you forget that once she’s riding some big guy, tits bouncing, her expression going from nervous to “fuck, harder” in a few frames. The humor actually lands most of the time, especially when Luna tries to be “professional” about giving happy endings and treats it like customer service on crack. One moment she’s politely asking a woman if she prefers fingers or tongue, next moment an eldritch goddess that looks like a horny sea nightmare is using her like a toy, and Luna’s trying to keep it together while getting filled from angles that don’t even make sense. The best part is when her restraint is low and she starts teasing others first, grinding on a shy girl’s lap, guiding some flustered villager’s hands to her tits, whispering dirty things in a tone that still sounds like a fairy offering you flowers. It shouldn’t work. It kind of shouldn’t even be this hot. But here we are.

Revenge stories in porn games usually feel like some edgy teenager’s wet dream, but this one actually leans into the petty, ugly side of it instead of pretending it’s some noble crusade. You play a guy who’s been fucked over in the past and never really got over it, stuck in this school environment where everyone pretends to be mature and romantic while doing the same toxic shit all over again. The game doesn’t rush to the sex, it sort of lets the tension rot first. You watch the MILF teacher with the perfect fake smile lean over your desk, tits almost falling out of her blouse, talking about discipline while you both know neither of you is thinking about grades. Then you have the teasing from girls who used to treat you like a nobody, now suddenly flirting, leaning in too close, “accidentally” brushing your cock, acting like they didn’t help break you back then. It all feels a bit too real sometimes, in a cheap way, like reading old chat logs you wish you deleted.

Since it’s a kinetic novel, you’re basically locked on rails, which I actually liked here. There’s no pretending your “choices matter” when they don’t. You just let the story drag you through this messy mix of resentment and lust. One moment you’re getting a slow, almost mocking titfuck from a big tits classmate who once laughed at you, watching her push her slick boobs together while she smirks like she still owns you, and the next moment you’re buried in someone’s big ass, pounding her hard because the game wants you to believe that fucking equals payback. It doesn’t, obviously, but that tension makes it hotter. The oral scenes are written like power plays instead of love scenes. You feel that in the way some woman drops to her knees, keeps eye contact the whole time, tongue working you over while she half insults you. It’s not sweet, it’s not “making love,” it’s closer to mutual blackmail with orgasms. The romance tag is almost funny, because yeah, there are tender lines and soft lights and those cliché “I always cared about you” confessions, but it’s all happening over the wreckage of what they did before. You get a creampie scene where you finally finish inside a woman who used to treat you like you were beneath her, and it should feel like a victory. Instead it feels messy, like both of you lost something and are pretending you won.

The female domination streak is not full hardcore mistress stuff, more like psychological choking. You get these women who know exactly what they’re doing, guiding the male protagonist by his dick and his grudges. They tease him, drag out the handjobs, sit on his lap with that slow grind that leaves him shaking, give him just enough pleasure so he keeps chasing, keeps dancing to their rhythm. Sometimes they flip it and act soft, almost apologetic, during vaginal sex scenes, riding him slowly, touching his face, whispering all the nice romantic words you wish someone said to you years ago. Then the next scene, they’re cold again, or using him, or reminding him who had the power all along. It’s twisted, but it matches how people actually behave when they mix revenge and romance: they say “I love you” with a knife behind their back. The 3dcg bodies are exaggerated in all the expected ways, huge tits bouncing while she rides you, big ass slapping against your hips when you go rough, but the expressions sell more than the flesh. A smirk at the wrong moment can make a blowjob feel like humiliation instead of comfort. A tiny eye-roll during a kiss can ruin the illusion of romance the script tries to build. That fits the whole mood: sex is hot, yeah, but it never really fixes the past, it just makes it easier to lie about how much it still hurts.