This Resident Evil parody throws you straight into Lady Dimitrescu's castle, and honestly? The devs knew exactly what they were doing. You're playing some poor bastard who's gotta survive Alcina's "trial" - which basically means getting dominated by a nine-foot vampire mommy and her equally stacked daughters. The turn-based combat system feels clunky at first, like they copy-pasted it from some RPG maker tutorial, but once you realize the real gameplay is about managing your stamina while getting your face buried in supernatural cleavage, it starts making sense. There's this one scene where Dimitrescu pins you against the wall and the camera angle is just... chef's kiss. The 3DCG models look decent enough, though Lady D's proportions are so exaggerated she looks like she'd topple over in real life.

Combat encounters blend into these weird BDSM scenarios where losing actually feels like winning. You'll find yourself deliberately failing just to see what creative punishment awaits. The spanking animations have more effort put into them than the actual sword fighting mechanics, which tells you where the priorities were. Sandbox elements let you explore the castle freely, groping your way through dark corridors while avoiding or seeking out the various monster girls lurking around. Some of the dialogue during sex scenes made me laugh out loud - not sure if that was intentional. The ahegao faces during climax moments are over-the-top ridiculous but somehow work within this campy horror-porn aesthetic.

What really caught me off guard was how they handled the size difference fetish stuff. Tall vs short dynamics play out in every interaction, from handjobs where your character can barely reach to titfuck scenes that look physically impossible. The harem aspect kicks in later when you're juggling multiple supernatural ladies, each with their own domination preferences. Voice acting ranges from surprisingly good to hilariously bad, but the moaning sounds authentic enough. Fair warning though - the grinding gets repetitive and some animations loop awkwardly.

This one hits like a horny Celtic fever dream where your playlist suddenly jumps from chill lo-fi to filthy club track with heavy bass and no one knows who touched the volume. You play this immortal warrior guy who basically keeps falling into trouble with every kind of dangerous woman: proud redhead warriors who look like they could break your neck and ride your dick in the same motion, druids with glowing eyes and way too much influence over your brain, smug queens who clearly use their tits as a political tool, that kind of vibe. It starts almost noble, like you think you’re the good guy in some old legend, but after a few choices you’re already grabbing a fistful of ass in a torchlit hall and pretending it’s all part of the strategy. It feels a bit like shuffling Spotify from “epic battle music” to “sex playlist” and then never going back.

What I liked is how it doesn’t treat you like some clueless virgin, even when the game is actually about turning pure girls into not-so-pure little worshipers of your cock. You get these quiet scenes where you’re talking to a proud female warrior about honor and battle scars, then suddenly your hand is under her leather armor, she’s breathing hard, and you’re deciding if you tease her with a slow handjob or shove her to her knees and make her taste you. Sometimes the camera lingers on her lips wrapped around you with just enough movement to feel alive but not like some overproduced porn. Other times it cuts right after the creampie and you’re like hey, let me enjoy the mess a second longer, alright? There’s also this thing where your “heroic” path and your “corrupt the whole fucking pantheon” path keep mixing. One moment you’re saving a village. Next moment you’re mindfucking their druid priestess and using her as a toy in a group scene while she chants in some old tongue and still somehow finds time to swallow. I love that energy. I also hate that some of the scenes tease you with perfect set-up for proper throat abuse or rough titfuck and then just jump back to plot like the writer suddenly remembered lore is a thing. But then you get this surprisingly soft masturbation scene with a so-called untouchable milf queen, sitting by a window, touching herself while remembering how you pinned her against a stone wall and filled her, and it hits like a slow, dirty track at the end of the night. You kind of forget you were supposed to be a hero at all and just start thinking which kingdom you want to fuck into obedience next.

World looks normal for like five seconds, then a goddess is throat-deep on some drunk guy in a dirty alley and a slime girl is pretending to be a bus stop. That’s the kind of vibe here. You’re the screwed-up youngest kid from this fancy sorcerer bloodline, raised like some expensive pet in a cage while dad plays “ancient destiny” dictator. You finally say “fuck this,” walk out, and crash right into a city where deities are cheating on mortals, monster girls are trying to pass for regular bar hoes, and everyone’s lying about what they are. It’s not subtle. One minute you’re sipping cheap beer, next minute you’re holding a demon girl by the horns while she’s riding you slow on a couch that still has plastic on it, moaning about how your bloodline tastes different while you’re trying to remember the spell to not blow your load too fast. Didn’t work for me, by the way.

What I really liked is how the lewd stuff just happens in between all the weird supernatural drama. You go talk to this “quiet, shy” girl in the library, and the second you notice her shadow moving out of sync you know shit’s about to get freaky. Few lines of flirting, a bit of awkward groping in the stacks, and suddenly her skin splits like a zipper and she’s got scales running up her spine, huge tits pressed against you, tongue way too long to be human sliding in your mouth. She insists you keep going even when your hands are shaking, and when you finally push her against the shelf and slide in raw, the game really leans into it: her claws on your back, wet sounds in your headphones, her whispering about how “human seed feels different” right before you dump a creampie that literally glows inside her. Then she zips herself back into “normal girl” mode and asks if you’ve done the homework. I opened Telegram in the background just to rant at a buddy about it, then remembered I’m not supposed to talk about this game with anyone and just sat there laughing like an idiot.

There’s this club scene where the pacing goes totally off the rails but in a fun way. You think it’s normal stripping: girl with big tits grinding on your lap, teasing your cock through your pants, licking your ear, that usual horny-night type of thing. Then the lights flicker red, her eyes go all void-black, and suddenly you’re in a half-ritual, half-orgy where three women are around you, each not quite human, each wanting your “family magic” inside them. One’s a monster girl with a mouth inside her thigh, another is a goddess pretending she’s just there for the music, and the third one is basically lesbian as hell but decides your tongue is good enough as a temporary toy before she focuses on the others. You’re switching between eating one out while another one deepthroats you, then getting pulled into group sex where they pass your dick like a joint, sloppy oral, spit mixing with that thick white mess when one of them jerks you right into another girl’s pussy without warning. The game doesn’t even pause to ask if you want to pull out. You just watch the cum drip out of her while she smirks and murmurs some spell that probably means trouble later. And I actually tried to roleplay the “responsible romance route” at first, which was adorable and completely pointless, because ten minutes later I was banging a deity in a bathroom stall while a monster outside the door pretended to be a broken hand dryer.

Jack’s the kind of idiot you remember from school. Not the cool guy, not the nerd, just that dude girls keep hovering around for no clear reason, like cats around the one person who didn’t ask for them. That’s the vibe here. You’re in this school hall, phone in hand, scrolling through some bullshit chat app while the teacher drones on, and suddenly you’ve got three unread messages from three different girls all wanting “help with homework.” And yeah, none of them actually care about homework. One sends a selfie with her tits squeezed tight in a too-small top, another sends a voice note whispering way too close to the mic, and the third just sends a peach emoji and a question mark. It’s that kind of game. You tap through, pick your answers, and try not to blow your whole harem by saying something dumb, even though the game clearly wants you to say something dumb sometimes.

The nice part is how it ramps from teasing to full-on corruption without acting shy about it. One minute you’re peeking at a milf bending over in her living room while she pretends she doesn’t know you’re watching, the next you’re balls-deep in her on the same damn couch, her huge ass bouncing in smooth little animated loops while her tits smack against her chest. The animations are short, yeah, but they hit that horny sweet spot: mouth wrapped around your cock, slow handjob with spit glistening, a titfuck where her big tits swallow you almost completely. Then it cuts, you go back to the chat, like switching tabs on your phone between Pornhub and Telegram. The school setting stays in the background, chalkboard here, locker there, skirt riding up on the stairs, a tight blouse riding higher every time she leans in “for a secret.” Half the fun is in those half-innocent touches, the casual groping in an empty corridor or brushing her thigh under the desk while she tries to keep a straight face in class and fails hard.

What sticks with me is how shameless it is about Jack being a walking sex magnet and not bothering with deep excuses. You want romance? It’s here, sort of. A girl blushing while she strokes you off, saying she likes you, then two scenes later she’s sharing your dick with her best friend like it’s some kind of group project. Lesbian bits sneak in when the girls get bored waiting for you, toying with each other on the bed, kissing and grinding while they tease you for watching, like a built-in voyeur mode. Sometimes you’re pushed to choose who gets your load, on the tits or inside, and the game doesn’t pretend your choices are noble. Sex toys show up without fanfare: a vibrator pulled from a drawer, a dildo slapped into a girl’s hand while she looks at you for approval before she pushes it in and moans. It’s rough around the edges, some scenes jump a bit too fast, some dialogue feels like it was written on a cheap Android keyboard on the bus, but that kind of makes it better for this style. It feels like a horny dev who knows exactly what buttons to push: big tits, big asses, mouths full of cock, girls fighting for your attention, harem chaos that somehow keeps working. You tap, you watch, you cum, and then you tell yourself you’ll stop after the next scene, which is a lie you already know is a lie.