I didn’t expect to laugh this much during what’s basically a porn game about rebuilding civilization with your dick, but here we are. “Dickcare” doesn’t even pretend to have subtlety, which somehow makes it better. It’s like the dev looked at every crossover hentai fantasy - Velma squinting behind foggy glasses, Raven pretending she’s not into it, Tatsumaki rolling her eyes while secretly moaning - and said, yeah, let’s just throw them all in one ruined world and call it salvation. The writing’s half self-aware and half deranged sincerity; the voice lines swing between awkwardly horny and genuinely funny. There’s one scene with Frankie in a busted gym locker room that made me pause, not because it was hot (though it is), but because she calls you “hero” in this weird soft tone right before things get messy. It stays in your head longer than expected.

What’s wild is how much *sound* adds to everything. You can tell someone cared about the way a zipper slides down or the slap echoing off concrete walls. The sandbox part? Looser than it sounds. You wander, talk, get distracted by some zombie side plot that doesn’t matter, and suddenly Velma’s stuck halfway through a ventilation shaft. It’s ridiculous, yeah, but also... kind of perfect. There’s no grind, no fake moral choice. Just dirty, absurd freedom. Though, I swear one moaning loop cuts off too early - it’s such a small glitch but now I obsess over it. Maybe that’s the point: perfection would ruin the charm.

It’s funny how a game full of cum jokes and cartoon parodies ends up feeling more alive than most serious stuff. Maybe because it doesn’t care if you take it seriously. One minute you’re saving humanity, next you’re wiping something off Raven’s cape while she pretends not to blush. If there were awards for “Most Unnecessarily Emotional Cum Scene,” this one wins without competition.

This Resident Evil parody throws you straight into Lady Dimitrescu's castle, and honestly? The devs knew exactly what they were doing. You're playing some poor bastard who's gotta survive Alcina's "trial" - which basically means getting dominated by a nine-foot vampire mommy and her equally stacked daughters. The turn-based combat system feels clunky at first, like they copy-pasted it from some RPG maker tutorial, but once you realize the real gameplay is about managing your stamina while getting your face buried in supernatural cleavage, it starts making sense. There's this one scene where Dimitrescu pins you against the wall and the camera angle is just... chef's kiss. The 3DCG models look decent enough, though Lady D's proportions are so exaggerated she looks like she'd topple over in real life.

Combat encounters blend into these weird BDSM scenarios where losing actually feels like winning. You'll find yourself deliberately failing just to see what creative punishment awaits. The spanking animations have more effort put into them than the actual sword fighting mechanics, which tells you where the priorities were. Sandbox elements let you explore the castle freely, groping your way through dark corridors while avoiding or seeking out the various monster girls lurking around. Some of the dialogue during sex scenes made me laugh out loud - not sure if that was intentional. The ahegao faces during climax moments are over-the-top ridiculous but somehow work within this campy horror-porn aesthetic.

What really caught me off guard was how they handled the size difference fetish stuff. Tall vs short dynamics play out in every interaction, from handjobs where your character can barely reach to titfuck scenes that look physically impossible. The harem aspect kicks in later when you're juggling multiple supernatural ladies, each with their own domination preferences. Voice acting ranges from surprisingly good to hilariously bad, but the moaning sounds authentic enough. Fair warning though - the grinding gets repetitive and some animations loop awkwardly.

Kislev looks normal at first glance. Streetlights, cheap shops, that one park bench where everyone pretends not to stare at each other. Then you notice how empty it feels, like the city is holding its breath. Officials keep saying “just a weird cold, nothing serious,” while half the people you meet have this strange tired look in their eyes and the other half are just horny as fuck and pretending nothing is wrong. You play this dude who goes “yeah, I’m out, I’m leaving the city until shit calms down,” but of course he’s late, like every protagonist with a big ego and a bigger cock. And somehow running away turns into drifting deeper into this mess of sex, money, and that quiet fear that maybe tomorrow you won’t wake up at all. Or worse, you will.

The whole thing feels like a fantasy about the end of the world where everyone deals with panic by getting freaky. You’re out there sweet talking thick women with soft bellies and massive tits spilling out of bras that never quite fit. There’s something really nice about how the chubby girls are treated, actually. They’re not a joke, not “before the glow up,” they’re just hot. Big asses, big boobs, big everything, and the camera really takes its time. You’re flirting, buying them shiny crap like cars and jewelry, acting like some budget sugar daddy, and half the time you know it’s stupid but it works, so you keep doing it. One milf leans over your new car, huge tits pressed against the window while she asks you if the seats are comfy enough to “test suspension.” And yeah, you say something smooth. Or you try. I misclicked the dialogue, told her something lame, and she still ended up palming my dick through my pants, super slow, teasing like she has all the time in the world even though the city might be dying around us. That scene actually made me pause Spotify because I wanted to hear every tiny sound. Then I put Spotify back, because I’m an idiot.

I like how the MC’s cock is treated like an actual presence. When a thick girl wraps her soft fingers around it for a lazy handjob, the visual really sells the weight, the size, the way her cheeks flush like “fuck, I didn’t expect it this big.” There’s a moment where a bbw presses your shaft between her heavy tits, and you can practically feel the warmth off the screen. It’s detailed, but sometimes weirdly clumsy, like the dev spent 3 days on the curve of a nipple and 3 minutes on the background. Also whoever designed the jewelry shop UI clearly hates humans, I swear one button is half a pixel off and it still annoys me. The game likes to tease too much sometimes: lots of grinding, lots of “almost” scenes before you finally get release, but when you do, it’s thick, messy, and right in her face or over her giant chest, and she looks proud like she just survived the apocalypse by taking your load. The virus, the panic, the lies from the authorities, it all just becomes this excuse for everyone to live harder, fuck louder, and pretend choices still matter. They probably don’t, but you keep clicking like they do.

Angela moves again. New neighborhood, new fake smile, same heavy shit packed in her bags. She’s this sexy, tired kind of woman who looks like she’s had too many arguments and not enough orgasms, if that makes sense. Her past is hanging over her like some shitty Netflix show she never finished, and now she’s back close to her family, which is… awkward as hell. You play as Rayne, basically the one stuck in the middle of it all, trying to figure out if you want to fix things, fuck things, or just run. The game doesn’t hold your hand; it just kind of drops you in and lets you poke at people and see what happens. One minute you’re talking about normal life stuff, next minute you’re catching your “aunt” in a towel that totally doesn’t cover everything and suddenly you remember this is not a “wholesome” story. At all.

The sandbox style hits different here. You’re not just clicking “next scene, next sex, repeat”. You wander, you snoop, you literally peek through doors when you shouldn’t. That moment when you accidentally see Angela late at night, sitting on the edge of the bed, fingers between her thighs, trying to get herself off just to forget her own memories? That hit me harder than I thought. Not just because yeah, it’s hot as fuck, but because she looks like she’s almost crying but also moaning and you can’t really tell which one you want to see more. Then again, a few scenes later she feels a bit too perfect, like someone’s horny idea of a mom in a porn search bar, and I kinda rolled my eyes… right before clicking every single option to push her even deeper into that role. The teasing is slow on purpose, sometimes to the point where I wanted to scream at the screen, like “just touch her already”, but then when it finally breaks, it feels a little illegal in a way that porn sites are absolutely built on. You know what I mean.

What I like is how it lets the lesbian stuff breathe. It’s not just “oh look, two women, now they kiss, scene over.” Rayne’s curiosity feels messy, like scrolling through Twitter and suddenly ending up on the wrong side of NSFW threads and realizing it’s the right side for you. She watches, she hesitates, she keeps “accidentally” walking in at the worst possible moments. There’s this one scene where she’s spying on someone in the shower, and the way the water sticks to skin and curves is so distracting that I literally missed my dialog option because I just stared too long. The romance angle is weirdly soft in between all the taboo: late-night talks in the kitchen, too-long hugs that really aren’t just family anymore, a hand on a thigh that stays there a second too long. It’s hot, but also uncomfortable, and I kind of love that it doesn’t try to make it clean. I do wish the interface didn’t make me misclick tiny choices when my hand is already busy, but that’s never getting fixed and maybe that’s part of the “challenge”. In the end, you’re not just watching them run from the past, you’re slowly helping them cross lines they can’t uncross, with each orgasm feeling like both a reward and another mistake, and somehow that feels exactly right for this kind of story.