Creepy House feels like that one horny urban legend your buddy swears happened to his “cousin in another town”, except this time you actually get to click your way through it. You play this kinda screwed over dude fresh out of high school, stuck in community college hell, surrounded by boring people who think a haunted mansion is the scariest thing ever. Everyone in the neighborhood is all “don’t go near that place, it’s cursed” and obviously that just makes you walk right up and knock like you’re delivering Uber Eats to Satan. Door opens, and instead of some old man with a shotgun, you get hit in the face with pure goth chaos: deadpan stares, black lipstick, cold sarcasm, and more teasing than a TikTok thirst trap. It feels like falling into a bootleg Addams Family episode nobody told the lawyers about, in the best and worst way at the same time.

The house itself is like a horny theme park. Every room is set up for some new awkward situation where you’re trying to act normal while someone’s pale, stacked mom casually leans over a table and her tits are doing jump scares at you. The game keeps throwing you into these little adventure scenes where you’re picking what to say, pretending you’re not staring, and yeah, if you play it half-smart, ending up with a lot of very sloppy, very enthusiastic oral action. One moment you’re “helping” Wednesday-style goth girl study and the next she’s on her knees making eye contact like she’s sucking out your soul through your dick. They tease like crazy too, the kind of slow hand on the thigh, “oh you’re getting hard from this?” shit that makes you want to punch your own screen and say yes, obviously. There’s this milf who talks like she’s just being polite, but every line sounds like an invite to cheat on someone you don’t even have. It’s that weird mix of creepy and hot that kinda should not work, but it does, then sometimes it doesn’t, then it does again. The “horror” part is 90% vibes and outfits, but occasionally they toss in a little dark joke that makes you snort at the worst time, like right when something filthy is happening and you’re half trying to, you know, focus.

What actually got me was this dumb little extra thing: as you mess around in the mansion and get deeper into this horny fake Addams situation, you unlock pin-ups of other goth girls that are clearly inspired by every internet crush you’ve ever had. It’s like the dev had a folder named “do not open at work” and just dumped it into the game. I kept thinking “ok, one more scene and I’m done” and then suddenly I’m chasing some new teasing route because I wanted to see if the quiet girl in the hallway actually snaps and drags you into some hidden room for a “punishment” blowjob. And sometimes the pacing just falls on its face, like you’re ready for something filthy and the game makes you click through a bunch of dialog that feels like it escaped from a sitcom from the 90s, but then you hit a line that’s so petty or mean or strangely romantic that you kind of forgive it without noticing. It’s messy, horny, a bit broken in the head, and it absolutely leans into that fantasy of “everybody told you not to go to that house” and you went anyway, and your biggest problem now is choosing which goth girl is gonna ruin your GPA with her mouth.

You’re the guy on the door of the last more-or-less holy place on earth, and it’s already not holy at all. Secret Refuge sounds like some serious religious bunker, but it feels more like a horny monastery run by people who forgot the original rules and just kept the guilt. Every day the gate buzzes, some fucked-up Outsider stands there telling you their sad story, and you decide: in, out, or “come back when I feel like abusing power.” The fun part is that this isn’t just moral choice button pressing. Your decisions drip into everything. Who you let in changes who walks the halls, who bends the knee, who ends up on their knees in your room while choir music leaks through the walls like a weird joke from the devs.

Inside the shelter, three big factions keep poking at you. There’s the fake-saint crowd trying to keep things “pure” while their nuns and virginal priestesses clearly have tits like heavy pillows and asses that don’t match their sermons. There’s a more practical, dirty group that doesn’t mind corruption at all, as long as you’re useful at the gate and in their beds. And then there’s the “intellectual” religious tech weirdos who built half the AI systems here and pretend they’re above lust, right until your hand is slowly groping under their robes in some candlelit corner and they’re mumbling prayers between moans. I like that the corruption is not just a meter. You see it in how their clothes shrink, how the teasing starts, how sleep sex suddenly becomes an option after a “blessing” ceremony where she drinks a bit too much, lies down in the common dorm, and you stand there staring, half-ashamed and hard as fuck. The game is very casual about male domination, like it’s just another resource to manage: food, faith, obedience, orgasms.

For an adult game, the sound caught me off guard. It’s not huge orchestral stuff, more like dirty little loops that sneak into your brain. Gentle ambient hum in the gate scene, then this soft, almost holy synth chord when you approve someone, but when you start harassing that busty acolyte in a storage room, the track adds this low, slow bass that feels like a heartbeat crawling into your spine. It’s weirdly sexy. Not “high budget sexy” either, there are these tiny glitches in volume, a loop that clicks on itself, and I actually like it. Reminds me of listening to lo-fi porn audio on VLC while another tab is open on a porn site you forgot to pause. The AI-generated CG fits that same vibe: sometimes the girls’ faces look a bit too perfect, or a hand is slightly off, but your brain patches it because the tits and asses are front and center and the animation in the right moments is smooth enough to make you forget you wanted to nitpick. There’s this scene where you catch a religious girl sneaking sweets from a forbidden stockpile, and instead of reporting her, you “punish” her by making her strip piece by piece, with you controlling the pace like a twisted rhythm game. The music stays calm, almost peaceful, while you grope her, make her stroke you, then push her down for slow vaginal sex on the cold floor; the mismatch between soft soundtrack and filthy movements hits way harder than some loud porn beat. The puzzle and management stuff are there, but half of the time you click your way through dialogue only to get back to that one girl you corrupted from shy believer to sleep toy, waiting in your bunk, snoring lightly, panties already sliding off because you trained her that way. Honestly, I wish the phone UI for the mobile browser version had slightly bigger buttons during one-handed moments, but that’s not going to change and maybe it shouldn’t. Makes every misclick feel like part of the mess you’re making, inside this supposed shelter and inside your own head.