Chrono Harem: Artifact of Syr feels like something a horny engineer cooked up on his lunch break and then accidentally made too addictive. You start as this regular dude in the present, nothing special, scrolling your phone on the train and suddenly you’re neck deep in time bullshit and alien tech that keeps pulling you into a shiny sci-fi future. One second you’re flirting with a thick milf in yoga pants who pretends she doesn’t notice how you stare at her ass when she bends over, next second you blink and you’re in this sterile, glowing lab where a girl with huge tits in a tight futuristic suit is explaining timelines while your eyes are glued to her cleavage. The game pretends it cares about “timeline balance” and “destiny” and all that, but half the time you’re just trying to decide if you wanna finish the handjob in the present or jump to the future to see if the ahegao scientist will let you go further this time.

What I like is how it keeps mixing the ordinary boring daily stuff with straight up porn fantasy. You wake up, check messages, maybe meet a milf neighbor who leans close to “fix your collar” and pushes her big tits right in your face, and you know already it’s going to end with her on the couch, legs open, you buried inside her, her face twisted into that full ahegao, drool on her chin and those stupid hearts in her eyes. Then later, in the future timeline, there’s this scene where one of the girls pins you to some weird sci-fi chair, starts stroking you slow while asking “for test data”, and when you finally cum she looks almost offended she got covered, then licks it off her fingers like it was planned all along. The animations make those little moments hit harder, like when a girl is riding you and her big ass actually bounces, cheeks smacking lightly while she moans into your ear, or when she slides down on your dick in one smooth motion and her stomach flexes, mouth wide open, tongue out, eyes rolled back. Sometimes the faces are a bit weird and plastic and I hate that, but then again, when she’s sucking you off and her lips shine and her head moves faster, you kinda forget everything else.

There’s a funny contrast between the “save the future” vibe and the fact that every path seems to end with you getting some kind of pussy. Even the “serious” scenes turn horny fast. One girl is explaining some artifact lore and halfway through she’s already on her knees, unzipping you and giving you this slow, sloppy blowjob, her cheeks hollowing in and out, spit running down your shaft. Another moment you have this calm talk on a balcony about choices and fate, then she just turns around, lifts her skirt, shows off her huge ass in tight panties, and you just know you’re going to end up fucking her from behind, her tits swinging with every thrust. The game loves vaginal sex most, there’s a lot of angles where you see yourself pushing in all the way, her body shivering and that shocked ahegao popping up just when you slam deep. Sometimes I wish there was one girl who wasn’t stacked like a hentai poster, but that’s never happening and I already accepted it. It’s dirty, shameless, very male-protagonist brain, and it sort of feels like watching your horny browser history turn into a time travel story you can poke at on your phone while pretending you’re just playing a “normal” game.

Three words first: awkward, horny, bittersweet. That is kind of the whole mood here. You’re the straight guy who finally gets confessed to by the cute “girl” from school, the one with the soft voice, stupidly pretty face, nice legs, shy smile, all of that. You panic, you say yes, your brain is screaming “I did it!” and then right after that the world slaps you with “oh yeah, she’s actually a guy.” The game pretty much lives inside that moment of confusion. It milks it. It stretches it. It keeps poking that same bruise: “you said you’re straight, so what the hell are you feeling right now?” And the answer is usually “hard.” The story plays it as romance and comedy at first, but there is this slow, sneaky sadness in there, like the way he keeps calling himself a “replacement girl” and laughs it off. That line stuck in my brain way more than the cumshots, which is kinda annoying because I came for the horny stuff and stayed for emotional damage like an idiot.

What I really liked is how cheap and petty the breakup plan is. You and your best friend literally sit down and go “ok, let’s make you the worst boyfriend ever so he dumps you.” You try to be late on purpose, you act cold, you ignore his texts, you pretend to be gross with your habits, and he still shows up in that cute outfit, blushing, trying so hard to be a good girlfriend even though he knows some people would just call him a trap and walk away. There is one scene where you drag him to a love hotel “by accident,” thinking he will freak out and run, but instead he just looks terrified and still says “if it makes you happy…” and undoes his skirt with shaky hands. That part hit me weird. It is hot, like really explicit, he is nervous and hard and trying to keep his voice from cracking while you touch him, and the game doesn’t fade to black or shy away from the details. At the same time you can feel he is afraid you might finally see “too much” and reject him. The sex is not soft-focus. There is messy blowjob, the kind where he tries to go deep and fails, chokes a little, tears in the corner of his eyes. There is anal where he clenches so hard you feel guilty even as you push inside. No censor bars, nothing. Just skin and precum and that annoying little whimper he does when you pull his hair. It is lewd as hell, but it never fully lets you relax, because the whole time he keeps thanking you for “not giving up on me yet” and it stings in the back of your mind that you are literally planning to throw him away. And yeah, the comedy bits are hit or miss. Sometimes the best friend is funny, sometimes he sounds like a Twitter thread. One of the texts about “straight guys speedrunning bi awakening any%” made me cringe and laugh at same time and I’m still mad about it.

But the game really shines when it goes quiet. There is this park scene, late date, just the two of you on a bench, and he asks if you would still like him if he stopped crossdressing. No sex in that moment, just his bare legs sticking out of that skirt, swinging nervously, and your choice box pops up. You can answer in such a cruel, detached way that it almost feels like you are kicking a puppy, or you can start slipping, saying things a “straight” guy shouldn’t say to a boy with lip gloss. If you keep going for the selfish breakup route, the way the story twists is actually mean. There is a “good” bad ending where you succeed and he dumps you, but you get this scene of him walking away in normal boy clothes, trying to smile, saying he is glad he could “practice being someone’s girlfriend at least once.” Then the game lets you sit there with that. No comforting speech, no heroic redemption on that branch, you just scroll through your phone alone, reading old messages where he spammed you cute selfies and little “good morning” lines. Felt kind of cold in my chest after that. And then on another route, if you let yourself fall for him, the sex scenes change tone. Same body, same dick, same panties, but your inner monologue shifts from “I’m not into guys” to counting the moles on his chest and thinking how nice he looks when he’s flushed and messy and calling your name. The romance is still awkward, the jokes still sometimes land sideways, the art has those weird small inconsistencies that only show up when he’s naked and you stare too close, but in a way I like that. It feels like a horny little VN made by someone who really loves femboys and also secretly enjoys stomping on the reader’s heart a bit. I finished one of the sadder routes, closed the tab, opened it again on another browser like a clown just to see him smile at me from the title screen and pretend I hadn’t already ruined his life once.

Angel Perversion looks at that classic “guardian angel” fantasy and just goes, ok, but what if she was horny, impatient, and a little bit of a dictator in a cute outfit. It’s a short kinetic visual novel, so you’re not here to min-max routes or grind affection stats. No choices, no branching, just you being dragged along while this angel decides your dick and your life need “correction.” As a gamification nerd, honestly, I kind of like how blunt that is. The “progression system” is basically her losing respect for divine rules while gaining interest in your cock. That’s the level-up curve. No menu needed.

The first time she appears over the poor guy’s bed, all soft glow and big tits squeezed into that not-even-pretending-to-be-holy outfit, it feels like the game is setting up a standard “comforting guardian” vibe. Then she starts talking. She’s not satisfied with how timid he is, how he fails at basic life stuff, and she sure as hell isn’t satisfied with how little action he gets. So she just… intervenes. Not in a sweet way. Think more “I’m your angel, you’re my toy, and I’ll fix this mess by using your body like it belongs to me.” There’s a scene where she pins him by the wrists, teases the hell out of him with slow oral, then switches to riding him just because she’s bored of his moaning pace. Zero negotiation. It’s not subtle, but it’s hot if you’re into male dom flavored from her side but with that vibe of “I control everything, including when you finally get to fuck me properly.”

Every bit of her is designed to distract you from the fact you’re not choosing anything. Big ass that bounces when she grinds down on him, tits that move just enough during those animated thrusts to make you forget this is basically a linear slideshow with motion. She uses toys on him and on herself, not because the story needs it, just because she’s experimenting with how far she can push him before he breaks. There’s this one moment where she jerks him with a toy pressed tight against his ass, whispering that he doesn’t deserve heaven yet, then forces him deep insider her and demands a creampie like it’s some holy sacrament. I actually laughed a bit and still had a hard-on, which is like, the perfect eroge brain glitch.

I should say, the “cheating” angle is handled in this weird “technicality” way. He’s got a girl in his life, and the angel treats that like a cute obstacle, not a moral wall. She practically encourages him to treat mortal promises as small print while she gives him heavenly pussy and oral that would convert an atheist. There’s a quick sequence where he worries about being faithful and she basically shuts him up with her tongue on his balls. Honest talk, that’s fucked up, but it fits the game’s whole “angel gone feral” thing. The fantasy vibes are there, halos and light and all, but it’s mostly background to justify why she can appear, bend him over, and then vanish like nothing happened. I do wish they used more of the angel lore stuff for actual progression, though. Like, give me a sin-meter or something.

What annoyed me, and this is small but it kept poking at my brain, is the way the UI highlight color doesn’t really match her color palette. Total tiny detail, but every time I clicked forward, it felt off. Anyway. Mechanically, leveling here is more emotional than numeric. You watch this guy go from passive loser to someone who fucks his own guardian angel hard, grabbing her hips while she begs for more. At the same time, she goes from detached celestial being to a needy pervert who can’t stop asking for “just one more” creampie, like she’s addicted to corrupting her own mission. It’s kind of like watching a skill tree grow sideways instead of up. The pacing is fast, some scenes feel rushed, like a skipped animation frame during anal where you think “wait, we already switched position?” but maybe that’s just me being spoiled by longer VNs. Still, when she’s riding him, wings trembling, drooling on his chest while he thrusts into her, the lack of choices stops mattering and it just feels like a straight-to-the-point fantasy that forgot to pretend it’s pure.

Keigo feels like that dude who peaked in high school but actually never even peaked, just failed quietly and then left town. Now he drags his ass back, broke, horny, and still kinda pathetic, crashing at Ichigo’s place like some NPC side character who accidentally got promoted to main character. Ichigo’s still Ichigo, of course, walking cheat code for popularity, swords, and women, and somehow he’s married to Orihime now. And she’s exactly what all those old Bleach fanarts promised, just turned up to shameless hentai levels: giant soft tits that bounce a little too perfectly when she laughs, thighs that don’t even pretend to fit normal clothes, that smile that looks innocent until the camera angle proves it isn’t. The game knows why you clicked. It doesn’t pretend otherwise for even half a second.

What I liked is how the whole thing feels wrong in a very specific way. You’re in Ichigo’s tiny place, pretending to look for a job on your cracked phone, scrolling fake job posts like it’s LinkedIn hell, while Orihime leans over the couch in those shorts that absolutely do not count as shorts, asking if you want more tea, and you’re trying to not stare at her ass and failing completely. The mobile UI actually fits the vibe here: it feels like you’re sneaking porn in a WhatsApp group while sitting at a family dinner you weren’t invited to. Keigo tries to act like a good guest, but the game keeps throwing you small choices that slide from “just chat” into “ok, that was not friendly anymore” and then into “yeah, Ichigo would definitely punch you for this.” You start with mild flirting, then accidental boob touch that is obviously not an accident, then late night scenes in the hallway where she whispers too close, breathing on your neck, pretending she’s worried about you when her nipples are poking right through her shirt. It goes from soft corruption into full-on “I want you to fuck me while my husband is in the other room” without ever doing that big dramatic turn, it just slowly rots. Like mold on bread, sexy mold.

Sex scenes themselves are exactly what you expect and then a bit worse in the best way. Orihime rides you with those massive tits clapping in your face, eyes glazed, sucking her finger, begging you not to cum inside her, and of course the only button you actually notice is the one that makes you drain every drop in her anyway. Animated loops focus on the important stuff: her ass slamming down on your cock while you watch the ring of white around the base grow thicker, the way her belly jiggles when you push her legs up and fuck her hard, the little moment she presses a hand to her womb like she can feel you filling her. There’s a scene where Ichigo’s in the shower, humming like some idiot protagonist, and you’re behind Orihime on the kitchen table, her hair spread, creampie dripping out while she clenches around you trying not to moan too loud. The guilt is there for Keigo, kind of, but the game doesn’t pretend he’s a good guy. Which is nice. He’s just a horny loser finally getting the girl he always watched from the corner, and he ruins everything with a smile.

Weird thing that bugged me way too much: that one text notification sound they use keeps popping up in the middle of the hottest scenes, and it sounds exactly like a Telegram ping, so I kept pausing thinking someone actually messaged me. Completely yanked me out of a creampie once, I’m still annoyed about that. Also, sometimes the writing swings between decently hot dirty talk and those awkward lines like “I feel your naughty rod deep inside my womanhood” and it’s hilarious in the middle of all the moaning. But then Orihime throws her head back, calls you by name, and begs for more like she’s never been properly fucked before, and suddenly the cheesy lines don’t matter. It feels like some degenerate Bleach doujin that escaped from 2010, grabbed your phone, and decided Keigo finally deserves his turn to be scum. Honestly, he doesn’t, which is why it works.