Steve wakes up in this blocky sex world like he’s spawned inside some teenager’s wet dream that never got a QA pass. Everything is made of cubes, including the girls, but the game kind of leans into the absurd instead of pretending to be serious. You click through scenes, pick dialogue options, occasionally move him around map-style, and it’s all basically an excuse to watch him try to fuck every redhead, elf, and weird villager girl with square tits. The writing pretends to be this epic adventure, but it’s more like: “walk three steps, crack a joke about wood, accidentally end up balls-deep in some pixel babe who talks like she’s been watching too much Pornhub.” It’s trashy, shameless, and totally self-aware, and that’s kind of the only thing that makes it work. I actually laughed at one line where Steve tries to explain “crafting a relationship” like it’s a pickaxe recipe and then immediately just rails her against a wall. He’s not a hero, he’s a horny idiot with plot armor.

From ethical side though, I have to be honest, the monetization feels like a creeper hiding behind a tree. The game looks silly and cheap on purpose, but then it pokes you with “extra scenes” and “bonus routes” that are clearly tuned to make you either grind boring clicks or pull out a credit card. It’s not loot boxes, but it has that same energy of “you’re already horny, you won’t think too much, just pay a little to see Steve fuck the extra redhead in the cave.” That kind of manipulative design annoys me more than any explicit content. If you put sex front and center, cool, we’re all adults here. But don’t pretend the choices are deep when some routes are practically locked behind micro-pain. And yeah, I know other adult games do way worse, but at least some of them are honest about being cash traps. This one hides behind jokes and parody, like “haha, Minecraft but horny,” while still squeezing for extra coins. I had this moment where I finished a pretty funny scene, and instead of a clean end, it pops a prompt hinting I missed the “premium doggy variation.” At that point it stopped feeling like a dumb fun fantasy and more like a very horny version of Candy Crush tactics. Still, the idea of a blocky guy banging his way through a stupid world ruled by cubes and bad puns is weirdly charming. It just makes me wish the dev trusted their own humor and porn more than their wallet.

Princess Peach in this thing is not the cute little damsel people remember from old school cartridge days. She wakes up basically drenched in yesterday’s fun, still with dried cum on her tits and belly, and the “oh no Mario is gone” energy is way more “shit, I need my dick back” than heroic quest. The whole game feels like somebody mashed an old Nintendo arcade with the kind of filthy hentai you’re not supposed to admit you watch, then said, yeah, Peach is a complete slut now, deal with it. You’re hopping through rooms of the castle, but every few screens you’re not really thinking about coins or enemies, you’re thinking “ok, who is she going to blow next and how hard is the cumshot going to hit her face this time.” It’s still that Mushroom Kingdom vibe, sort of, just with Peach dropping to her knees faster than a goomba gets flattened. Seeing her with her crown on, mascara a little messy, lips shiny with spit while she’s deepthroating some random troop that’s supposed to be Bowser’s guard is weirdly hot and kind of stupid in the best way.

The “levels” are basically excuses to set up more sex, and that’s not a complaint at all, except when it is. You press the same couple of keys to jump or dodge and then suddenly you’re locked into a blowjob loop where timing the strokes actually matters for how fast the guy explodes on her face. One mistake and you’re watching Peach choking and gagging, blonde hair stuck to her cheeks with semen, like she’s done this a thousand times, which she kinda has, lore-wise. I liked that there’s this one moment where she sneaks past a fire trap only to “accidentally” land on a cock waiting behind a column, like, girl, really, you didn’t see that? It made me laugh and jerk off at the same time, which is a cursed combo. But the game also loves to stall you with tiny annoying bits, like one segment where the platforming feels off by half a pixel and you just keep falling, losing the mood, until the next scene of her hungrily sucking off a chain chomp reskins your brain again. The parody is all over the place, like they misremembered half of Super Mario Bros and didn’t care, but that actually makes it hotter somehow, because it’s less respectful and more “fuck this childhood memory, Peach is a cock-hungry mess now and she’ll use sex as her only weapon until she gets her plumber back, if she even wants him after all that.”

Kasumi here is like that one figure you keep at the front of the shelf because she just looks too cute and too horny at same time. The game throws you right in front of her, kneeling there with this absurdly huge black cock pointed at her soft lips, and it feels less like a “scene” and more like you walked in on her private training. She’s got that usual shy kunoichi face, cheeks a bit warm, eyes lifting up at you like she’s waiting for your reaction before she goes all in. Her boobs are just stupid big, like someone took her normal DOA body and clicked “+” on the chest slider twenty times. Every tiny movement makes them bounce and stretch the fabric, and sometimes I caught myself ignoring the blowjob just to watch how her breasts squash together when she leans forward. Honestly I spent way too long pausing and unpausing to see the exact point where her top looks like it’s gonna lose the fight.

Once she starts, it’s very slow, like she’s tasting this thing and learning the shape of it. The tongue work is nice, she circles the tip and then drags up the underside, and her lips leave a little wet shine that looks almost too real. Then suddenly she switches gears and goes from “I’m a little nervous” to “I’ve done this a thousand times in the dojo” and just slams her mouth down on the shaft. Her throat bulges a bit when she takes it deep, and that gaggy, messy sound hits you right in the horny brain. There’s this moment where the camera is just slightly off center, so you see one boob closer, all jiggly and swollen-looking from the breast expansion effect, and the cock sliding in and out of her mouth at the same time. It looks kind of ridiculous, but in that hentai way that makes you go “ok, yes, more.” I wish the saliva strings between her lips and the tip lasted longer, but they don’t and they never will, and somehow that annoyed me more than it should. At the same time I liked that it didn’t last too long.

The cumshot at the end is a bit overkill, in a good pornhub-2012 way. Thick white load just floods her mouth, leaks over her lips, drips down that cute little chin onto her pushed-together boobs. She tries to hold it in, cheeks puffed out like a squirrel hiding nuts, then it spills out anyway. I laughed a bit because it reminded me of that “more, more, more” meme, except here it’s just her swallowing and swallowing. The way her eyes half-close, like she’s proud of herself for taking all that, is adorable and kind of filthy. The whole time I kept thinking, “Is this Zack’s cock?” The model is dark like him, but the game never actually shows his face, which is weird because my pervy collector brain wanted the full crossover fanservice. It almost feels like they made Zack, then chickened out and just cropped him. Or maybe that’s funnier actually, like he’s just a cock on legs. Little side note: the ambient sound in the background is nothing special and there’s this tiny loop that repeats and once you hear it, you can’t unhear it, and now I’m gifting that curse to you. Anyway, if your thing is watching Kasumi worship a big hard cock from inches away, her boobs swelling and shaking while she milks out every last drop into her greedy mouth, this hits that exact spot without pretending to be more complicated than that.

It’s been your secret wish to find a workplace filled with stunning women, but who would've thought that a bank would be the place to fulfill that fantasy. The reality is brutal and tempting - the office buzzes with feminine energy coming from your team, your supervisor, and the clientele.

Will you stay responsible or give in when faced with so much alluring distraction? This isn’t just another 9-to-5 job; this is your new life, where work ethic wrestles with primal urges. You hold the reins, and only you decide how deeply you dive into this intoxicating world.

Picture yourself navigating the polished halls filled with whispers and glances that linger just long enough to make your heart race. The line between business and pleasure blurs as you juggle tasks while stealing secret looks at the women who know exactly the effect they have on you. From innocent chats by the water cooler to late evenings where the office transforms into a playground, every moment is charged with unspoken tension.

As you build relationships, the choices multiply - will you remain the focused, reliable employee, or will you surrender to the seductive pull that surrounds you? Maybe you’ll share private jokes and flirtatious comments with a shy teller who can’t hide her interest, or perhaps you’ll get caught up in a thrilling secret rendezvous with your alluring manager after hours. Every decision leads down a different path, each more tempting than the last.

Get ready to face what comes next – secret desires clash with professional boundaries, leading to dangerous games and delicious rewards. This is your story, unfolding with every choice you make in an office alive with temptation. Are you ready to lose control and rewrite the rules, or will you cling to your professionalism and watch the heat simmer from afar? The decision is yours - dive in and find out.