Vault 69 feels like somebody took a Fallout parody, spilled a full Pornhub search history on it, and then said “yeah ok, this is the plot now”. You play as the only useful dick in an underground vault that ran out of common sense and condoms at the same time. The Overseer basically pats you on the shoulder and says “go breed, champ”, while the whole place is full of desperate, half-broken, half-horny people that somehow still find time to argue about rations and power supply. It’s not subtle. It’s not trying to be smart. It just throws you into a post-apoc mess where your cock is both resource and weapon. You walk around the vault, talk to girls who are clearly one bad day from snapping, and every choice is like a weird mix of dating sim and HR management, if HR was about who gets to swallow and who only gets it up the ass.

What I liked is that the game doesn’t pretend sex is soft or romantic. It’s rough, dirty, and sometimes a little fucked up in the head. You’ve got big-titted slaves, “volunteers” that are clearly not okay, raiders topside who think “negotiation” means forcing the protagonist to prove his value by breaking in new captives. One scene had me trying a pickup line like “Let’s save humanity together” and the girl actually laughed at me before forcing me to go down on her as “practice” for future breeding candidates. Another time I tried a more aggressive line, something like “Bend over the desk, I’m tired of talking”, and she just locked the door and went full dom on me instead, using my face on the chair and calling it “evaluation”. The game loves flipping your expectations like that. Sometimes your cheesy line works and opens a new hardcore scene, sometimes it gets you punched, sometimes it triggers a weird management event about population stress where you’re suddenly filling forms after filling holes. And yeah, those stupid little stat prompts that pop up on screen, they feel like Excel sheet made horny. I hated it. I also kind of liked it. I don’t know.

Outside the vault it gets nastier and funnier at the same time. You meet wasteland chicks who are way more dangerous than the gun they’re holding, and somehow the dialogue still makes room for cringe pickup attempts. Had a moment where I tried to be smooth with a raider girl, something like “You look like trouble, I like trouble”, and she just put a boot on my chest and told me I’ll “earn the pussy” by bringing her slaves to trade. Next thing I know, I’m back in the vault doing this awkward loop of cold resource management and hot, brutal sex, trying to decide who gets treated like a person and who gets used like equipment. The violence can be a bit much sometimes, honestly, but the world is so broken it weirdly fits. I wish there were more soft scenes where characters just fuck for fun, not duty, but this setting is not really about cozy cuddling anyway. It’s about mouths full, asses sore, power plays everywhere, and you stuck in the middle pretending your shitty pickup lines are actually saving civilization. At least when I alt-tabbed to check Discord after a particularly harsh anal scene, my brain needed a second to remember that in real life, people don’t usually ask “What’s your breeding quota today?” so I guess the immersion works a little too well.

This one feels like someone grabbed a bunch of messed up fairy tales from an old Tumblr archive, poured too much horny into them, then stitched them together with tape and spite. You jump from one little “chapter” to another, each about a different princess or monster girl, and it never quite behaves the same way twice. Sometimes you’re clicking through choices like a horny gremlin, sometimes you’re stuck on one screen just staring at a princess in chains while deciding if you go full bastard or pretend to be a gentleman for three lines before ruining everything again. It has that cheap 2D CG look that somehow fits perfectly, like fanart that escaped from DeviantArt and learned how to talk dirty.

The Disney parody angle is not subtle at all. One moment you’re in a desert palace with a very not-licensed princess in transparent harem pants, the next you’re watching her milk drip through the fabric because some “blessing” of a magic artifact turned her into a walking cow fantasy. There’s actual choices around that too: keep her as a humiliated slave, drag her to the shop to buy toys and chains, or pretend to “free” her and then chain her to the bed anyway when she tries to run. When the genie shows up, he’s not doing three wishes, he’s doing “how much anal, how much oral, and which hole gets the creampie first.” It sounds crude but the writing has this weird emotional whiplash. You get moments where she spits insults, calls you a monster, you spank her until she does that stupid ahegao face, tongue out, drool, and then three clicks later she’s asking why you didn’t kiss her after you fucked her. Absolutely romantic. Totally normal.

Then there’s the monster girls and the more… questionable stuff. The game does not care about comfort zones. There is ***, humiliation, bestial stuff, that feeling of “oh shit, I should not be aroused by this, and yet here we are.” A lamia coils around your guy, squeezes until he can’t breathe, then uses him like a living dildo. A corrupted princess rides a centaur while you watch and jerk off like some pathetic court wizard who lost control of his own spell. At some point I spent like five minutes just trying to click the right option so I could see the lactation scene loop again, because the way her breasts bounce when the magic spell forces her to squirt on command is genuinely hot in this stupid, low-budget way. And then, in another branch, that same girl is surrounded by a group of guards, getting used one after another, cum dripping out of every hole, and she still has that princess pride in her face like she’s trying not to break while you decide if you go for a handjob ending or shove toys into her until she cracks.

What I like is how inconsistent it all feels, in a good way and also in a “who wrote this at 4 in the morning on Red Bull” way. Some scenes are pure male domination power trip, where you drag a chained girl by the collar, make her lick your boots, force oral until her eyes roll up. Then suddenly you hit a route where a demoness sits on your chest, slaps your face, makes you cum with just her feet and your own hand, and laughs at you for being her little toy. There is one bit I keep thinking about: that stupid little shop screen where you buy a cheap-looking vibrator, take it back to the dungeon, and the scene changes only by this tiny drawn toy in her hand, but the dialogue completely flips her personality. She goes from sobbing *** victim to desperate, horny mess begging you to push it deeper while your character mocks her for loving it. The game pretends to be a light parody, but some of these stories end like a punch in the gut, with the girl broken, collared, used by monsters and men, covered in cum, and you get this short line of text hinting that, in another path, she could have escaped with a girlfriend instead, living a quiet lesbian fantasy far from the palace. You will probably ignore that and reload for the anal gangbang anyway.

Boon feels like somebody took all the usual straight dude fantasy crap, tossed it in the trash, then said “nah, let’s make this horny and weird and actually about these two messed up cuties.” You’re basically hanging out inside the head of this male protagonist while his life gets hijacked by a tall trans woman with big everything and a femboy who looks like he escaped from a sissy subreddit. It’s a kinetic novel, so you’re not babysitting choices every two seconds, you’re just dragged along while this “special relationship” between them gets more twisted, hotter, and kind of sweet in a fucked up way. One moment it’s teasing, next moment there’s her hand on his throat and he’s on his knees, then you’re like “wait, did he just moan at being called a good girl?” and yeah, he did.

The scenes ramp up in a way that feels less like porn logic and more like a slow, horny car crash you can’t look away from. You’ve got this big ass, big tits trans dommy who clearly knows she owns the room, and she treats him like a toy she’s training. There’s sissification stuff where he’s getting pushed into panties, make-up, all that humiliating “you’re my cute little thing” talk, and the game doesn’t flinch. She’ll edge him for ages, ride his face, make him choke on her, call him pretty while she’s wrecking his ass, and he’s stuck halfway between “I’m a man” and “please ruin me, mommy.” At some point there’s anal where he’s trying to pretend he’s not loving it and failing hard, and the writing actually sells it. It’s not just “he moans again, wow, so hot,” you get the dirty details, the shame, the way he gets turned on by being powerless. There’s futa-on-male, trap-on-male, some incest flavor lurking around the edges they don’t scream about but it’s there enough to make you feel slightly wrong for liking it. I opened this in another tab while Spotify was playing and legitimately forgot my emails for a while, which is wild because half of the time the characters are just talking and it’s still hotter than half of Pornhub.

What surprised me is how the 3D style actually helps the vibe instead of killing it like in those dead-eyed Unity sex “games.” The bodies look like they belong in this filthy little universe: thick thighs, round asses, tits that practically announce themselves, and the femboy is perfectly in that uncanny spot where you’re not sure if you want to bully him, fuck him, or both. Oral scenes especially hit hard, you can almost feel the spit and the gagging when she pushes too deep. There’s one moment where she shoves him against something, whispers something brutally degrading in his ear, and he just melts, and you’re sitting there thinking “yeah ok I get it now.” And because it’s split into episodes, you get these little arcs where a new kink creeps in, like the teasing moves into harder femdom, or the relationship between the two “subs” shifts from awkward to “I’ll suck you off because she told me to and I secretly love it.” The pacing is all over the place sometimes, like it lingers on stuff that doesn’t matter and rushes stuff that’s insanely hot, but somehow that makes it feel more like you’re watching someone’s fucked up fantasy play out than some polished porn machine. I still hate how one specific sound effect keeps repeating in the background at weird times and it annoyed the hell out of me, but I kept clicking anyway because I wanted to see how far she’d push them in the next scene.

You start as this poor bastard locksmith who can’t catch a break, gets greedy one night, eats a bullet, and suddenly you’re standing in front of a smug goddess who basically says: “Congrats, you’re dead, now put on a habit and seduce girls for my religion.” It sounds stupid written out like that, but it kind of works because the game never pretends to be serious. Everyone in this world thinks you’re a girl, but under the nun clothes you’re a guy, and the game loves playing with that confusion. You walk around the convent and the town like a fake innocent sister, while slowly corrupting one girl after another, and half the fun is watching them go from shy and faithful to moaning sluts who can’t stop touching you. It’s less about one big romance and more about slowly collecting your own small cult of stacked nuns with huge tits and asses who think “prayer” means getting filled in every hole.

Most of the time you’re in this sandbox loop: walk around, trigger scenes, grind affection or “faith” with each girl, unlock the next stage of their corruption. There are quests, but not like big epic quests, more like “help her with chores, get her alone, end up groping her over the habit.” One moment you’re pretending to be a good sister listening to their problems, the next you’re got a crying novice pressed against the altar, your hand under her robe while she begs you to teach her “new rituals.” The animated scenes are honestly where the game shines the most: tits bouncing while you pound them from behind in the chapel, white habit pulled up over a fat ass, her rosary smacking against her back every thrust. There’s full-on vaginal, oral on the church benches, creampies where the camera lingers on your cum leaking down her thighs and soaking the holy cloth. It doesn’t shy away from group stuff either; at one point you earn enough trust that two of the girls decide to “share blessings,” and you end up pinned between them, one riding your cock while the other sits on your face, both in nun outfits, kissing each other while moaning your fake nun name. The game acts like it’s about saving lost souls, but you’re really just turning the convent into a pervy harem hotel.

What surprised me is how casual it is to play on phone. It runs as a mobile game fine, which is dangerous, because you’re on the bus tapping through what looks like a normal quest, then suddenly a monster girl with horns and big tits is sucking you off in a graveyard. Some girls aren’t even human: there’s this fluffy-eared, big-booty “sister” who is clearly not from any bible, and the scene where she sits between your legs, tail twitching while she slowly licks your shaft, feels way more intimate than it should. The mini games are kind of random: there’s one lockpicking thing that should be your big skill, since you were a locksmith, but it’s so easy it feels like a joke, and then out of nowhere there’s a timing mini game in the middle of a blowjob scene that made me fumble my phone in a café. I wish there was more depth in how you level each girl’s corruption, like some proper gamified tree of “teasing” to “total slut,” but instead it’s more linear: flirt, grope, lesbian experiment, full sex, group sex, done. Still, the teasing stages are actually nice; watching two nuns “practice confession” by groping each other over their robes, then slowly sliding hands under the cloth, wet sounds and nervous giggles, almost did more for me than the full-on gangbang in the chapel later. The home upgrade system is there too, you pump money into better rooms and the convent becomes more like a luxury sex monastery, with private cells for your favorites, but the UI made me misclick so many times I started hating the furniture icons and then forgot why I was mad in the first place. Anyway, if your thing is watching cute “holy” girls turn into cock-hungry worshipers, getting creampied on the altar while a smug goddess laughs in the background, this thing does not hold back.