This one starts like someone mashed a porn parody with a super old flash mini game, then forgot to polish half of it and went “fuck it, it’s good enough.” And somehow that actually works. It throws you right into a cheap-looking Star Wars knockoff room, with this Rey clone giving you that half-innocent, half-“I know exactly what’s going on” look. At first I was kind of annoyed, because the UI feels like it was made on a Monday morning by a hungover dev. Buttons are tiny, some stuff doesn’t really stand out, and I kept misclicking on shit when I just wanted to grab her by the hips and not open a random menu. But after a while you start to understand how the game “thinks,” and then it clicks. The way choices slowly unlock more dirty scenes feels like you’re leveling up in pure perv skills. When I started, I was just mashing the basic options to see her tits. After a few rounds I was timing actions, testing dialogue, figuring out what opens the more hardcore stuff, trying to “min-max” my way into that messy cumshot ending. It’s stupid, but I’m proud of that.

Funny thing, the Kylo knockoff in here is nothing like movie Kylo. Here he’s basically a walking dick with a lightsaber and some edgy lines. And that dick is huge. Like porn comic huge, not “real human anatomy” huge. First time Rey gets on it I literally said “no way that fits” at my screen. It adds this ridiculous, over-the-top vibe where every scene is turned up to eleven. You don’t just get a quick fuck. You get Rey choking on this giant cock while she tries to talk, her eyes watering, that cheesy space background behind them. Then you mess up one option and suddenly the pacing goes all weird, the scene cuts too fast and you’re just staring at a static image thinking “wait, that’s it?” Some moments feel rushed like that. There’s this one animation where her head moves but her body is like a statue and it pulled me straight out of it. I still replayed that scene three times, though, because the sound of her gagging is lowkey perfect. Yeah, I know, priorities.

What actually surprised me is how much the game accidentally trains you. At first I treated it like dumb fap material. Then I noticed I was experimenting with order. Talk dirty first, then touch, then push further. Don’t jump straight to “slam her on the table” or she doesn’t react the same. It kind of mirrors real flirting in the most trashy way. You try different lines, see what she likes, adjust. Screw up and you get a weaker scene or some half-hearted blowjob where she barely reacts. Get it right and suddenly she’s riding that big cock like she’s been waiting for it the whole trilogy, moaning non-stop, eyes rolling back. There’s a bit where you time your thrusts and if you keep the rhythm, you get this longer finish with cum all over her face and tits. Miss the timing and he just shoots once and it ends. Already annoyed me once that the cum lands slightly off on her cheek, not aligned with the head, and now I can’t unsee it. Still came. Still went back to see if I could get a “better” splatter like some horny speedrunner. The whole thing is cheap, messy, a little broken, but if you grew up with these dumb parody games and like watching Rey get absolutely wrecked by a huge cock while you try to “optimize” your way to more nudity, it just kind of hits that brain spot you don’t admit you have.

It’s a weird kind of satisfaction, commanding faceless troopers while your real goal isn’t victory - it’s corruption. You’re not some noble hero here, no shiny saber, no destiny. You’re the one sending wave after wave of stormtroopers, watching them stumble, regroup, push forward through blaster fire and moans. The target? That rebel princess in white who thinks she’s untouchable. The game doesn’t pretend to be subtle about it. She fights back, sure, but every round she loses a little more ground, a little more fabric, a little more control. And when you finally break her defenses, the reward isn’t a cutscene of triumph - it’s raw, messy, animated filth that feels like a victory you shouldn’t enjoy but absolutely do.

The strategy part sneaks up on you. You start thinking it’s just a quick fap game, but then you’re replaying the second level because your troop order was wrong again. You curse at the screen, half-hard, half-frustrated, wondering why the empire can’t aim straight even in porn. And yet, when it clicks - when your timing’s perfect and the rebels crumble - it hits that same dopamine rush as beating a boss in some proper game. It’s ridiculous how serious you start taking it, all while the background music hums like a cheap sci-fi knockoff and Leia’s voice lines get filthier each defeat.

It’s not pretty, not polished, and maybe that’s why it works. There’s something about the janky animations and the unapologetic parody that makes it feel more alive than the glossy stuff. It’s like a dirty joke told by someone who can’t stop laughing halfway through. You’ll wish for more levels, maybe more variety, but you’ll still replay the same damn mission just to see her break again. The empire doesn’t win often, but when it does, it fucks like it means it.