Diva Mizuki on a bike is already funny to me. She looks like she should be on stage moaning into a mic, but instead she’s blasting down some empty road and almost runs over a girl just randomly lying in the middle of the street like she rage-quit real life. That whole opening is kinda messy in a good way. No big explanation, no sad story, just: hot girl, bike girl, “oh no what happened,” and then very fast it becomes “ok, let’s get her somewhere private and naked.” It feels like those nights where you open three tabs, one is Twitter, one is Pornhub, one is some weird hentai site, and you keep swapping between them until your brain is mush. This game basically does that for you, but with one redhead, one idol-looking Mizuki, and then that little surprise when the “pretty girl” suddenly has a dick and your brain just goes “ah, it’s this kind of story, ok.”

The vibe is horny but also lazy in a chill way. There’s no big drama, nobody is pretending this is deep. They talk in Japanese and honestly if you watched enough hentai before, you don’t need subtitles to understand “I’m shy, no wait, I’m actually insanely horny, wow look at all this cum.” I had Spotify lo-fi playlist on in background, some random “Tokyo chill beats to fuck your brain” thing, and it actually fit too well. The scenes move slow and then suddenly jump into rougher thrusts and loud moans, like you scroll your phone and accidentally hit max volume on a porn ad. One second Mizuki is playing the nice savior, the next she’s just covered in cum from both sides, acting like this is the most normal result of helping a stranger in the road. The redhead girl-turned-futa is my favorite part, because she starts all soft, almost innocent, then she’s slamming Mizuki’s huge ass from behind while the guy is stuffing her mouth, and it looks so wrong and so right at the same time. The game doesn’t care about realism. Positions just kind of happen. Suddenly Mizuki’s big boobs are bouncing right in your face, then cut, now you’re staring at a creampie leaking out while the other cock is still twitching. It’s like watching three horny people forgetting gravity exists.

If you want to really squeeze all the juice from this, don’t rush-click through. Let the scenes breathe a bit, focus on small stuff: how Mizuki’s body arches when she gets filled from both holes, the way the redhead’s cock pulses as she shoots a messy cumshot all over Mizuki’s face, that one angle where you only see her ass and dripping pussy and you realize someone put effort into that one frame like it’s a love letter to big asses. Mute the moans once, then replay with sound, see which hits harder. Try to time yourself with the final creampie, like a stupid mini-game only you know about. And if you catch yourself rewinding the same moment where both of them finish on her at once, it’s fine. This thing is built exactly for that kind of “just one more time, I swear” spiral.

Become Alpha is a porn game with tons of memes, kickass branching storyline, quests, RPG-like experience system, and a possibility to have sex with many partners. It's also pretty damn funny. The story is about Harry Panuchkin who's a nerd and a wannabe gangster. He has a big dick, but never actually used it. It's your job to help him get the pussy and make him a proper alpha male, that he always wanted to be.

Makoto Nanaya here is basically what happens when some BlazBlue dev has one horny thought too many and the internet turns it into a whole game. You don’t get plot walls, no fake epic story, it’s straight to the point: squirrel girl with huge tits and a thick ass wants your dick in every possible angle the camera can handle. She still has that cocky fighter vibe, like she’s about to trash talk you between sucking you off, which honestly feels on-brand. You click in and it’s just her, looking like she jumped out of some cursed rule34 folder you pretend you don’t have, except now she’s actually reacting to what you do instead of being stuck in a jpeg. I went in thinking, “ok, quick fap, check the animations, leave,” and then ended up trying to see how many times I could make her swallow before the facial just painted her whole face like some degenerate speedrun challenge.

POV here is doing heavy lifting. You’re basically glued to her eyes while she works your cock with that smug little half smile like she knows you’re about to blow way too fast and she’s fine with it. The blowjob loop is surprisingly hot, especially when her tits are bouncing just on the edge of your vision, and if you’re like me and you chase 100% unlocks like a lunatic, you’ll start experimenting with timing, switching between her mouth and tits just to see the different cum placements. Facial, mouth, inside, it’s like collecting endings in a VN, just with more moaning and less “skip text.” Creampie finish has that nice “oh shit I shouldn’t but I’m doing it anyway” energy, and when she squeezes around you while you dump inside, that’s the moment I went “ok, this is way better than it has any right to be” and then immediately complained to myself about one tiny clipping issue on her hair that nobody else will ever notice. Also I got stuck once trying to trigger a different position because my dumb ass kept clicking the same hotspot expecting a new scene like some kind of erotic Dark Souls. But when she’s riding you, tits out, tail twitching, and you’re watching her big ass slam down in POV, that annoyance just kind of melts away into the background noise of “yeah, I’m absolutely going to replay this and pretend I’m testing mechanics again.”

This thing plays like a weird mix of pub quiz night and horny anime fever dream. You’re this college kid wandering around campus, not for grades, just trying to climb a very different kind of ranking: how many hot women you can charm, outsmart and then absolutely rail. Every girl you meet comes with two big things: massive tits and a list of questions that make you feel like you should have actually listened in class. One moment you’re staring at a teacher’s cleavage while she’s asking about history dates, next moment she’s on her knees, lips shiny with spit, treating your cock like extra credit. It’s stupid and fun at the same time, like using Wikipedia with one hand and jerking it with the other.

What actually surprised me is how the whole “answer five questions to fuck” thing gets in your head. First girl I ran into looked like that classic hentai campus babe, skirt too short, boobs almost falling out, asking me random shit about science. Got one answer wrong and she just smirked, crossed her legs, and told me to come back when I’m “less useless.” I wanted to rage quit, opened Chrome instead, hit Google and a bit of Wikipedia, came back and suddenly I’m balls deep in her, slapping into her pussy from behind, watching her ass bounce while she moans and begs for more. It’s kinda dumb how satisfying that feels after doing actual thinking. Brain on quiz mode, dick on creampie mode. Perfect combo. Except when it isn’t, because some questions feel like the dev was just scrolling random pages and picking words, but somehow that also makes it funnier. You’re like, why the fuck do I need to know this to deserve a blowjob? Then she’s gagging on you, drool down her chin, and you kinda stop caring.

Stuff really clicks once you start chasing the “prettiest woman in the college” angle. There’s this strict teacher, total mistress vibe, glasses, hair up, that classic “I’ll ruin your life but you’ll thank me” look. When she leans in and whispers that you’re not ready for her yet, it weirdly stings. So you go fuck your way through the campus, one quiz at a time, loading faces with cum after a rough doggystyle session, filling pussies, watching those big boobs bounce while she claws at the sheets. Some scenes are actually hotter when you fail a couple of times before nailing the answers. It feels like you’ve earned that moment where she gasps as you shove it deep and you don’t pull out, she tightens around you, and the screen shows her getting a sticky creampie like a reward screen gone very wrong. I kinda wish the questions got even nastier or more twisted as you go, but they stay in this strange mix of normal trivia and random bullshit. Anyway, it ends up feeling like Pornhub and a school exam had a baby, and that baby really wants you to cum on your teacher’s face for getting a perfect score.