What the fuck is this game even called. I bounced off the title harder than Hiishi bounces on your, well, you know. The devs buried the real name somewhere in a support link, but who cares. The pitch is simple. You rub your office crush. That’s it. That’s the whole plot. No pretense, no weird magical girl transformation, just a dude and his hunky coworker on a table.

The whole thing has this deliberately crusty, unpolished look that feels like finding a weird flash animation from a forum thread in 2007. A thread you were probably too young for. Hiishi Mamoru is a hairy, beefy guy and the game is laser focused on the slow, awkward tease of a workplace massage. You click and drag. That’s the control scheme. Sometimes it feels like the cursor is sliding through molasses and I spent a solid minute just trying to get a reaction by poking his shoulder blade like a broken robot. The bad endings are surprisingly easy to hit, you get one wrong twitch and suddenly it’s all over, back to the corporate spreadsheet dimension. The character just shuts you down and it’s genuinely more tense than half the horror games I’ve played.

Getting to the actual cumshot endings requires a specific, unspoken rhythm. There’s a secret dialogue after you finish that had me snorting, a weirdly sweet little punchline to the whole messy affair. It’s entirely a touch based visual treat, no dating sim stats to grind. I wish there was a bit more visual feedback between the tease phase and the climax, it goes from zero to fluids faster than a teenager’s browser history.

The whole thing feels like a sticky note passed in class. Short, crude, and entirely focused on getting one specific reaction out of you. It’s free. It knows exactly how gross and specific it is.

You know that feeling when you're watching an old anime and the love interest is about to drop her towel but the scene cuts to a chibi face and a nosebleed? This game is like someone took that moment and said, no, let's just do the thing. No pretense. Just a woman in leather, looking at you like she knows exactly what you're thinking, and a puzzle that gets her clothes off.

The mechanic is simple. You get two pieces of an image, like a vertical slice of a photo, and you slide them together. Match the edges. That's it. But the tension, man. The first puzzle is her in that jacket, zipper halfway down, and you can see the curve of her breast but not the good part. You're fumbling with the mouse, trying to line up the seam of her leather pants, and your brain is doing that thing where it forgets basic geometry because there's a hint of dark hair just below her navel. I spent way too long on one where her thumb was in the frame and I kept thinking it was something else. You know what I mean.

The real model thing works. It's not some airbrushed fantasy. She has stretch marks on her hips and the hair on her pussy is actually there, thick and untrimmed, which you don't see in these games usually. It's always waxed smooth like a dolphin. This feels like someone's real photo, which is hotter and also a little weird if you think about it too long. Don't think about it. The leather creaks when she moves in the later puzzles, or at least I imagined it did. Sound design is just clicks. I wish there was a button to replay the strip animation without redoing the puzzle. But there isn't. So you just sit there after you finish, looking at a static image of a woman with her legs apart, and the game doesn't care. It just waits. Like, what now? Nothing. That's the point. You already got what you came for.

Pussy Memory. That's what it's called. Right to the fucking point, I guess. Load it up and it's just a grid of photos, real photos, not drawings. The kind that look like they were taken on a shitty phone in bad lighting. And the mission? Find the matching pair of cunts. That's it. Some are shaved smooth, some got that full hairy bush going on, all shapes. It feels less like a game and more like someone dared you to stare at a gynaecology textbook while a clock ticks down.

The timer is the real bastard here. You think it's easy, right? Just match the slits. Then you're down to five seconds, sweat beading up, and every pink fold starts looking identical. I swear the game shuffles in a few that are pixel perfect copies just to mess with your head. There was one round, I could've sworn I had the match, two perfect shaved ones, clicked it, wrong. The subtle difference was a tiny mole I hadn't noticed. My fault for rushing, but still. The whole thing is wrapped in this bare bones interface, basic flash game stuff that makes you check if your browser is about to crash. It's not pretty. It's not trying to be.

Wish there was a mode without the time pressure, just to... appreciate the variety? Sounds weird to say. But the frantic clicking to beat the clock kills any real erotic vibe, turns it into a panicky logic puzzle. A logic puzzle where the pieces are hairy and shaved pussies. There's a score at the end, don't really care. The photo selection is honestly pretty varied though, which is more than I can say for some polished hentai games that just palette swap the same three body types. Sometimes you win and get a full screen shot as a reward. It's fine. The whole thing is like a weird, horny bootleg of that old Simon Says electronic toy. Just a quick, dirty brain-scramble for when you got fifteen minutes to kill and don't want to think about your life.