The first thing I thought when I opened *Lusty Buccaneers* was, “oh god, it’s going to be another lazy parody,” but then the main menu music hit me with this weirdly sensual flute loop that made me laugh and also kinda set the tone. You’re this half-dressed pirate guy who somehow keeps running into women that look suspiciously like they escaped from a certain famous anime, only now they’re way more interested in licking rum off your chest than finding treasure. I didn’t expect the story to actually *try*, but it does - sort of. One minute you’re fighting a sea monster, the next you’re having a long, awkward talk with a woman whose boobs look like they could sink a small ship. The writing swings between goofy and horny like it can’t decide if it wants to be a joke or a fantasy, and that’s exactly why it works.

There’s this scene with Nami - well, “Nami” with an extra vowel somewhere - that’s supposed to be a negotiation, but halfway through she just leans in and starts teasing you with her foot under the table. I swear I dropped my phone. The animation is smoother than it needs to be for something that’s basically porn with dialogue, and yet it still glitches when you try to scroll back during a titfuck scene. The devs clearly love their characters though; even the background girls have these tiny details, like the way Vivi’s eyes flick up when she’s pretending not to stare at you. Sometimes the pacing goes nuts - you’ll go from a group sex scene straight into a heartfelt chat about loyalty, and I couldn’t tell if I was supposed to be turned on or emotional.

What I weirdly liked most is that it doesn’t care about being consistent. One moment the protagonist is this cocky bastard, next he’s shy like a schoolboy when Boa gets too close. It makes him feel more human, even if his anatomy clearly isn’t. I wish they’d fix the dialogue box though - it covers half of Robin’s face during the best parts. But maybe that’s the point. Maybe pirates never get clean views of anything. I don’t know. I just know I kept playing longer than I meant to.

Lily’s manor feels less like a “setting” and more like some horny group chat that accidentally turned into a religion. You’re this smug futa noble with a holy title slapped on top, walking around a house full of maids who have somehow decided your cock is basically divine scripture. It starts simple. You wander the halls, poke your nose into rooms you probably shouldn’t, talk shit, choose some dialogue, watch the girls react. One maid gets flustered when you tease her about praying for your “blessing” and two scenes later she’s on her knees giving that “blessing” the slowest, sloppiest oral in front of an altar like that’s totally normal. It’s half sex game, half “what if Catholic guilt but everyone actually likes it”.

The wild thing is how casual the corruption hits. First, you think: okay, cute nun outfit on this maid, standard stuff. Then you notice how the game keeps pushing that religious angle. Confessions that turn into handjobs. A “purity test” that is literally just Lily ordering a virgin maid to strip and bend over because “we must check for temptation.” There’s a nice little management loop hiding under all the lewd too. You assign maids to duties, pick who goes to the dungeon with you, who stays home, who you “reward” after a long day. Dungeon runs are just classic turn based fights, nothing fancy, but the context makes them funny. You’re beating up monster girls, then five minutes later you’re fucking them into your harem like it’s part of their onboarding process. One slime girl scene caught me off guard: she tries to drown Lily, combat ends, then the game calmly flips straight to Lily balls deep in her while we get that internal view, little animated pulse, and you just sit there like “yeah, that escalated fast.”

I kept telling myself I would focus on one girl, stay loyal, see her whole arc. That lasted until the older maid with the big ass and fake “I’m too mature for this” attitude walked in with a tray and Lily just ordered her to suck her off under the table during a serious talk about “faith.” The game loves that mix of silly and fucked up. There’s ***-ish stuff, some straight up harassment, and then it cracks a joke about house rules in the same scene. You’ll have a futa on futa titfuck against a stained glass backdrop like some kind of cursed church poster, then next room is a shy girl masturbating with a sex toy she “borrowed from storage” and trying not to get caught. Multiple protagonists pop in too, which is weird at first. Suddenly you’re not Lily, you’re one of the maids sneaking into Lily’s room to taste the “holy seed” while she sleeps, and the game just rolls with it. Group scenes get messy fast, creampies everywhere, nuns losing their faith between Lily’s legs, monster girls joining the dogpile, some lesbian side route that pretends Lily isn’t watching from the doorway. It’s all very animated in a way that makes you feel like the manor is alive and kind of sick in the head. My only real complaint is that one door near the chapel that makes the same annoying sound effect every time you click it, but I still kept coming back to it, hoping there was a scene hidden behind it where Lily corrupts the last stubborn virgin and crowns herself “Saint of Bad Decisions” or something.

City is fucked, virus hit, and suddenly this quiet nobody from the council wakes up with “congrats, you’re the mayor now, everyone else is dead or gone.” That’s pretty much the whole vibe. No fancy hero intro, you just walk out into streets that feel half-abandoned, half-hungry, and every girl you meet is either scared of you, wants something from you, or ends up on her knees because the new laws say so. Power here is not metaphor, it’s literally “sign a paper and that shy nurse is now legally required to spread her legs for public morale.” The game leans very hard into that fantasy where your word is the only rule that matters, and every scene is built around that: city hall office sex with the blinds wide open, turning a rescue shelter into your private harem base, using “health checkups” as excuse to bend a trembling secretary over your desk and fuck her raw while she tries to still call you “Mr. Mayor” without choking on your cock. It plays like a corruption sandbox, but the corruption is half on them and half on you, because early on you may actually try to be nice and then the game keeps tempting you with easy shortcuts like “legalized prostitution as economic stimulus” and suddenly you are running a citywide brothel network with branded uniforms.

What really hooked me was how casual the mind control and paranormal stuff creeps in. At first it’s legal pressure and fear. Then you unlock these weird powers after a shady lab scene, and now you can just touch a girl’s forehead and flip a switch inside her, turn a proud cop into a cock-hungry slave who still wears her badge while you make her suck you off in a dark alley, knowing patrol cams are catching every second because you ordered surveillance to stay online “for safety reasons.” The more you abuse it, the more the girls change, not just dialogue, but their whole attitude. That quiet librarian who used to flinch when you mentioned public punishment? Later she’s volunteering to get chained naked in the square, dripping while the crowd watches and you decide if she gets her first anal pounding there in front of everyone or in your private room with her mouth full and her ass already lubed from your last creampie. There’s group scenes where your personal harem kneels in a line and you just walk along, using them one by one, some trying to impress you with deepthroat, others begging for cum inside because in this broken city, being pregnant with the mayor’s kid is basically a golden ticket. It’s filthy, unpolished in a way that actually fits the setting, and yeah, sometimes the game trips over its own ambition, like a choice menu that promises moral dilemma but really only asks if you want to fuck her in the ass first or keep her pussy untouched for later. Still, when I was signing a “public morale decree” while some big-titted ex-councilwoman rode my dick on the mayoral throne, moaning that she used to be your boss and now she’s your slave, it felt exactly like the kind of wrong, nasty fantasy this sort of game is supposed to be.

This thing feels like someone took an Assassin’s Creed Japan spin-off, cut out all the parkour that makes you sweat, then stuffed the empty space with horny kunoichi that exist mostly to get fucked into submission. You’re this wandering guy with a dead-village grudge, stalking through feudal alleyways and temple rooftops, not because you care about honor or whatever, but because every ninja girl is another chance to bend a clan over and make it your personal toy. The story pretends to care about “prophecy” for like five minutes, then it’s just setups for you ambushing some masked kunoichi, choking her a little, and choosing if you want her mouth, pussy, or ass first. One moment you’re in bamboo mist, listening to a dramatic line about revenge, next moment she’s got her tongue on your cock and her eyes rolling up in that full ahegao “I lost the mission and my dignity” way. The vibe is weirdly funny too. There are lines that feel like shitposts, like the MC talking about “ninja pussy tax” completely straight-faced, and I swear at one point a captured kunoichi says something that sounded like it was copied from a horny Twitter reply under a cosplay pic.

Since it’s a kinetic thing, you’re basically locked into this rail of escalating scenes, but the pacing somehow still manages to feel chaotic. One girl is introduced like a serious boss assassin, whole build up with cloak and blades and references to “shadows”, then she’s on her knees sucking you off before you even memorize her name, drool running down her chin while you grab her hair and use her throat like it owes you money. Another route swings from foot teasing to full-on gangbang speedrun. There’s a bit where two kunoichi and a captured “rival” girl end up in this tangled lesbian mess, licking each other out trying to show who can please you better while you sit there deciding who gets the creampie and who only gets it on her tongue. Bodies press together, hands everywhere, and the game really loves showing when a “tough” ninja starts moaning like a porn actress with way too much energy, especially when you push into her ass for the first time and she does that shocked little twitch. Then you get group scenes where you’re balls-deep in one girl’s pussy, another riding your face, and a third pressing your cock back in for a messy double penetration angle that feels like it should break someone, but they just end up thanking you and calling you “master” like becoming your slave is some secret ninja promotion. The only thing that kept pulling me out is that weird running joke with the smell of squid after you’re done. It’s gross, it’s kind of hilarious, and I couldn’t stop noticing it, like when Spotify keeps recommending you the same weird song after a playlist ends. But then again, by the time you’re shoving a kunoichi’s legs up by her ears to plant another sticky load deep inside and watching her smile like she finally understands her place, that little detail somehow fits this whole fucked up, horny fever dream of a ninja world.