It’s weird how this game feels both filthy and kinda wholesome at the same time. Like, you’re just a farmer, right? Doing your chores, minding your crops, and suddenly there’s this pig-girl princess showing up in your barn acting like she owns the place. She’s spoiled as hell but somehow adorable, rolling her eyes while asking you to “show her how humans do it.” The writing doesn’t even pretend to be subtle - one second you’re talking about feeding pigs, next thing you’re milking something that definitely isn’t a cow. The transitions are janky in a funny way, like the devs knew exactly what they were doing and didn’t care if it made sense. Honestly, I respect that kind of chaos.

The humor hits that perfect spot between dumb and clever. There’s a scene where the royal advisor tries to lecture you about “proper conduct with livestock” while you’re literally hiding behind hay bales with the princess moaning your name. It’s stupidly hot and stupidly funny. And the futa twist? Didn’t see that coming (pun totally intended). The first time it happens, you just stare for a second like - wait, did that just grow? But it works because the tone never shifts into serious mode; it stays playful, teasing, constantly flirting with absurdity. There’s even a lactation gag that somehow turns into a group scene, and by then you’ve stopped questioning logic entirely. You just go with it.

I kinda wish the farmer had more dialogue options though; sometimes he just grunts or blushes when you want him to say something dirtier. But maybe that’s part of the charm - you project your own filth onto him. The art style’s got that soft, round look that makes everything feel warm even when it’s absolute debauchery. And yeah, I laughed out loud when the princess called herself “royal pork” mid-handjob. Who writes that? Whoever they are, they get it. It’s horny, messy, self-aware, and doesn’t apologize for any of it.

I didn’t expect a porn VN to remind me of old YouTube prank videos and shitty MSN chats at the same time, but this one kinda does. Early 2000s vibe hits right away: chunky phones, ugly clothes, random posters that look like they were stolen from Limewire, and three girls who are absolutely not ready for “professional” porn at all, which is why I liked them. They’re messy, horny, loud, and half the time they’re laughing in the middle of a blowjob like it’s a blooper reel. You’re this clueless fisherman with big himbo energy, trying to pretend you know what you’re doing while these girls drag you into making “content.” Every scene feels like a mix of awkward home video and real romance, like someone put softcore cable TV and a shitty cam show in a blender and forgot the lid.

What really made me stay was how the game treats the lewd stuff like it’s normal life, not some sacred ritual. One moment she’s joking about your clothes smelling like fish, next moment she’s sliding down to your lap, stroking you slow with one hand, still talking trash about your haircut. There’s this scene on a shitty old couch where two of the girls are arguing about camera angles, and you’re sitting there with your dick out, and then one just shrugs, climbs on your lap and starts grinding while the other keeps filming and giggling. It feels like you’re all just playing around, but then the animation hits that perfect rhythm and her ass is bouncing in your face and it suddenly gets way too hot. Bodies look thick in a good way, tits that actually move when they get grabbed, asses that don’t look copy-pasted. Sometimes the faces go a bit weird during certain angles, then the next shot is gorgeous and you forget you were just judging it two seconds ago.

I like how the group scenes never feel like some cold porn studio script. There’s one moment where all three girls are crowded around you in this tiny room, joking about “auditions,” and they start teasing one by one. One is rubbing her chest against your back, another is on her knees working your shaft with slow, lazy strokes, the third is just there to whisper the filthiest things in your ear like she’s trying to brainwash you. It’s cute and fucked up at the same time. They’ll laugh, shove each other around, smack your ass for no reason, then suddenly get serious and look at you like you belong to them and only them. That’s the part that hits my yandere brain, honestly. They pretend it’s all fun and business, but the way they look jealous when someone else gets more attention? Yeah. If this was real life, somebody would slash someone’s tires. Sex scenes feel like they’re halfway between a joke and a confession, and you’re stuck in the middle, leaking all over their hands while they decide how far they want to go on camera this time. I kept pausing just to stare at their bodies like a creep and then pretending it was for “plot,” but whatever, that’s their fault for making it this horny and stupid and sweet at the same time.

Frieren looks way too calm for someone getting dragged into that kind of hole. Like, she keeps this saintly face while the whole dungeon’s alive with squishy noises and glowing runes that probably weren’t OSHA-approved. The game doesn’t even pretend to be serious - one second you’re clicking through some dusty corridor, the next she’s half-stuck in a wall, robes sliding down, and I swear the tentacles have better comedic timing than half the anime parodies I’ve seen. There’s this dumb little sound effect when you misclick that feels like the dev trolling you personally. And yeah, I laughed, then immediately felt weird for laughing, then laughed again. That’s the loop here: arousal, confusion, laughter, repeat.

Mechanically, it’s point-and-click, but not the “find the key” kind - more like “poke the wrong spot and something indecent happens.” The animation’s surprisingly alive; her eyes twitch in that awkward, human way that makes it both hotter and funnier. You can tell the artist’s obsessed with micro-expressions - tiny smirks, that split-second of resistance before she just gives up trying to look dignified. The glory hole bit? It’s handled with this absurd level of ritual, like the dev wanted to parody sacred fantasy tropes but ended up making the most unholy confession booth imaginable. Sometimes the camera lingers too long, like it’s waiting for you to blink first. I didn’t.

What kills me is how unserious it all feels. There’s no fake epic music, no “chosen one” nonsense - just this quiet, looping moan track that somehow fits the dungeon’s echo. I kept expecting a boss fight, but the only thing that fought back was my mouse hand. It’s lewd, sure, but it’s also self-aware in a stupidly charming way. You can almost hear the dev whisper, “yeah, I know what you came for,” while Frieren’s face says, “I can’t believe I’m in this mess again.” And honestly? Same.

This one feels like somebody smashed a harem fantasy and a dumb sitcom together, then added way more ass shots than needed, and somehow it works. You play this guy sent to “protect” a family of three women, which of course means moving into their house and pretending there is some serious danger while mostly getting distracted by thick thighs and huge tits every five minutes. It starts pretty tame, like you’re just helping with groceries, fixing a door, trying to act professional, and then suddenly you’re staring at a milf bending over the couch, her dress riding up, and the game pauses on her big ass like, yeah, we all know why you’re really here. I actually laughed because the tone is half horny, half “oops I tripped and landed dick-first” energy. The humor is kind of stupid, in a good way, and the teasing is brutal. They know exactly when to cut away, or have someone interrupt right at the moment hand goes under panties, just to make you swear at your screen.

What surprised me most is how much time you spend just… talking. Not in a boring way, more like you slowly build this feeling that any of these women could be the “main route” if you want. One day you’re joking with the older one in the kitchen about how she can’t reach the top shelf, next day you’re pinning her against that same counter and her tits are pressed into your chest, her voice all shaking while she tries to pretend she’s still in control. The 3D models sell it hard: thick curves, big tits that actually move when she rides you, that kind of stuff. There is this scene where you finally fuck her in her bedroom, lights low, she’s on top grinding slow, talking about how long she’s been lonely, and then you get the choice to pull out or not. If you stay in, watching her face change when she realizes you’re creampying her, it’s stupidly hot. After that, the whole vibe with her changes, like she’s softer with you, touches you more in normal scenes, then suddenly snaps cold if you flirt too obviously with one of the others. And yeah, the game remembers that. If you chase her and the younger woman at the same time you get some really awkward breakfast conversations where everyone is smiling just a bit too hard.

I lost one ending because I tried to be greedy and go for every big ass in the house at once. You can get a more “romantic” thing where you’re actually loyal and the final sex scene feels earned, like long teasing paying off with this slow, deep vaginal fucking where she wraps her legs around you and begs you to stay inside while you cum. Or you can be a chaos gremlin and unlock drama routes where you basically ruin the house dynamic and still end up balls deep anyway. There is this stupid tiny thing that annoyed me, by the way: the main guy sometimes makes these cheesy protector lines that sound like they were written by someone who binged too much Netflix, and I kept wishing I could just click a “shut up and kiss her” option, but it never shows up. At least the game lets you steer the mood a bit with your choices, sometimes going for a sincere compliment, sometimes going straight for dirty talk like “you like when I grab your tits like this, right?” and watching them react. I will say, I opened this on Chrome and for some reason it lagged a bit during one of the big creampie animations, which killed the mood for a second. Swapped to Firefox, perfectly smooth, which is exactly how the milf isn’t when you push her up against the shower wall. The story keeps pretending danger is important, something about protecting them, but after the third time you wake up in a house full of horny women in thin pajamas, it’s clear what threat you’re really dealing with. And no, I’m not changing routes, my milf ending is canon, anyone picking the younger one as “best girl” is just wrong and I will die on this hill.