There’s something weirdly hypnotic about this one. Maybe it’s the way the story pretends to care about training or discipline, but every scene just turns into a slow slide into something filthier than the last. The girls act like they’re trying to impress you, but half the time it feels like they’re daring you to lose control. Hinata’s quiet voice hits harder than it should, like she’s whispering something she’s not supposed to say. And Ino - god, she’s written like she knows she’s in a parody and is just rolling with it. I kept expecting the game to break the fourth wall, but it never does, it just stares back at you like, “Yeah, you’re still here, huh?”

The mobile version runs smoother than I thought, though the sound loops are a bit off - someone really needs to fix that moan that cuts mid-breath, it’s driving me nuts. Not in the good way. The scenes with Tsunade are ridiculous, like they were designed by someone who’s never seen gravity in action, but that’s kind of the charm. There’s a moment with Mei that almost feels tender, until the dialogue reminds you this is a slave trainer fantasy and tenderness doesn’t belong here. I liked that contradiction, actually. It’s filthy and fake and still manages to hit something real for a second before yanking it away.

I wish they’d done more with the Scooby-Doo crossover joke; it shows up once, then disappears like it was embarrassed to be there. Also, why does every character blink at different speeds? It’s unsettling. But when the camera lingers on Sarada’s smirk, you forget everything else. The writing slips between awkward and accidentally poetic, like a drunk confession. And even though I’d never admit it out loud, I caught myself replaying the Hinata route just to hear her break that one line again - it’s wrong, and it’s perfect.

Naruto porn games usually feel like some horny dude slapped boobs on a PowerPoint and called it a day. This one actually tries to be an “adventure” and not just a fap machine, which is cute, because five minutes later you’re making Hinata moan against a tree while pretending you care about plot. You start as Naruto, obviously, and the game just throws you into this village map where every girl suddenly forgot what personal space is. One second you’re “on a mission,” next second you’re sneaking peeks at Sakura undressing behind a paper wall, squinting at your phone like, yeah, this is exactly what Kishimoto had in mind back then, totally canon.

It leans really hard into groping and voyeurism in a way that feels almost too on point. Walk into a training ground, boom, Tenten stretching with her tits basically announcing themselves, and the game is just like, “press here to ‘help’ her adjust her stance.” That “help” is your hand on her ass, by the way. No subtlety. The funny part is how the dialogue pretends this is all very serious ninja business. Tsunade is there, huge breasts barely trying to stay inside that coat, lecturing you about discipline while your only “choice” is where you want to grab first: her tits or her thighs. You can go from pervy peeks to full-on vaginal sex scenes in like two clicks, no slow burn, no romance, just chakra-enhanced thirst. I was playing on mobile in incognito on Chrome, and at some point I legit forgot this was supposed to be a parody and not some lost doujin that crawled out of NHentai and got buttons slapped on it.

Specific moments stick in your brain. Like, there’s a scene with Hanabi where you’re “training her Byakugan” and the drill is literally you watching her masturbate while pretending it’s some focus exercise. Or that bit with Karin in a dark corridor where she’s pressed against the wall, cheeks out, and you’re “checking her wounds” from behind. Yeah, sure, wounds. Suigetsu randomly pops up just to be a thirsty idiot and then disappears again, like the dev remembered he exists and then lost interest. The voyeur scenes with Ayame are weirdly hot for no reason at all; she’s just bending over a counter, and the camera angle is so obviously perverted you almost laugh. Then there’s Lady Tsunade again, because of course the game knows exactly why everyone clicked on it: big tits, big ass, big “medical exam” that turns into you fucking her office desk raw while she pretends it’s therapy. Sound is basic as hell, but the low effort kind of works. Those cheap moans through your phone speaker in the bathroom feel dirty in the right way, like watching porn with awful audio on some sketchy site. The funniest part? The game keeps throwing “fantasy” excuses at you, like, “oh no, Orochimaru cast a spell, guess you have to touch her there,” and by that time you’re already one-handed on your screen and not reading anything. It’s messy, horny, dumb as shit, and somehow that fits this universe a little too well.