Imagine waking up and realizing every stupid horny joke you made about “yeah I’d totally smash that mon” actually became your new life. That is literally the whole vibe here, and somehow it works way better than it should. You are this reincarnated guy in a world that kind of looks like the usual pocket monster thing, except everyone around you is either stacked like a hentai doujin or has curves that make zero sense biologically. The game just shrugs and says “yeah, you’re here to fuck, not to ask questions,” and throws you at girls and monster girls like you’re some walking breeding item. One moment you’re pretending to be a serious trainer talking with Nemona about battles, next moment she’s grinding on you and asking if your “move” is super effective while she rides you raw and begs for a creampie like it’s part of the gym rules. It’s really dumb. I love it.

The best part for me is how it treats all the famous girls as if they’ve been waiting for you personally. Misty showing up all smug, doing that fake tsundere “I’m only doing this for training” while she’s on her knees, stroking your cock with both hands and licking the tip like she’s taste testing a potion. Marnie being all quiet but then suddenly sitting on your face, thighs trembling, whispering nasty stuff that would break canon so hard. Hilda teasing you nonstop, riding your lap and pushing her tits together for a slow titfuck, with this lazy smile like she knows you’ve memorized every frame already. Sonia pretending she cares about “research” while taking off her coat and letting her big ass bounce on your cock, all animated, soft jiggle, clapping sound in your headphones, you know the drill. The models actually look like twisted versions of their originals, not ugly knockoffs, which is rare in these parody things. And the monster girls… yeah. Gardevoir giving this gentle blowjob like she’s worshiping you, then pulling you deep inside her and asking you not to pull out. Mewscarada acting all smug, rubbing her pussy on your shaft first, like “prove you can handle me,” then moaning like crazy once you slam into her. Lopunny is just straight-up fetish fuel, there is no other way to describe it. The game knows exactly what it’s doing and doesn’t pretend otherwise.

What surprised me is how often I opened this on mobile “just to check something” and ended up stuck watching one animation ten times in a row like some idiot, because there is always one little movement I missed. Jessie’s blowjob scene where her lipstick smears a bit and she strokes you faster with that annoyed Team Rocket face? Peak. Nemona jerking you off while ranting about battle stats, using spit as lube and then suddenly pressing your dick between her tits like she remembered titfucks exist mid-scene. There is some actual voyeur stuff too, where you’re hiding behind bushes watching a milf trainer finger herself while her mon watches, and your stupid horny brain is like “okay but when is my turn,” and yes, of course the game gives you that. Sometimes the pacing is weird, like it jumps from teasing to full vaginal in one click and the dialogue barely catches up, but somehow that chaotic energy kinda fits. I had one moment where I was going through a “serious” talk with a character and I clicked the wrong option and suddenly she was on her knees giving me a handjob, zero lead-up, and I laughed so hard I had to pause the scene. But then I watched it twice anyway. The adventure stuff is just an excuse to move you from one girl or monster girl to the next, and honestly I stopped pretending it was about anything else after the first time I pumped a full load inside Sonia and she smiled like that was the secret objective all along.

Konosuba: The Harem Adventures feels like someone took the original anime, spilled horny fanfic all over it, then decided, “yeah, this is fine” and clicked publish. You wake up as the usual unlucky dumbass hero in Axel, tossed into another world where monster girls want to kill you, then ride you, then maybe both at the same time. The game pretends to be about quests and turn based combat and all that, but everyone knows why your mouse is hovering over Aqua’s tits instead of the “attack” button. Half the time you’re joking with her about her useless goddess act, then the next scene she is on her knees, drool on her chin, eyes rolled back in perfect ahegao while you think, “yeah, this is exactly what she deserves.” The writing leans into the humiliation, the teasing, the whole “she’s divine but still choking on your dick” thing without blinking. It is not subtle. It is not trying to be.

Then there is Darkness, who looks like a walking BDSM fantasy and acts like someone switched her brain with a masochistic attack dog. The game really plays with that. You pick a “normal” romantic answer and she somehow twists it into “please degrade me more.” During combat she is supposed to be your tank, taking hits from monsters, but the game keeps cutting to little animations where she is basically cumming from pain, armor sliding off, ass taking up half the screen. It is funny at first, then hot, then slightly pathetic, which is also kind of hot if you are honest. And in town, when you go into the more sandbox parts, you can push her a bit further every time: a “training” session that starts with standard handjob and ends in anal with her begging you to hit her harder, while the scene keeps that goofy Konosuba humor. It never lets you forget this is a parody, but it also doesn’t shy away from being straight up filthy. Same with Megumin: she is obsessed with explosions, obviously, but here her climax is treated like a literal blast, with the build up in combat turning into sexual build up in her private events, including a scene where she has you pinned, riding you with this unhinged grin, moaning about “releasing it all at once” like she is talking about magic. The game knows exactly what it is doing.

Outside the main trio, the game broadens into pure harem chaos. There is the milf innkeeper who looks like she walked out of some cheap porn ad on the side of a pirate site, but her scenes are shockingly tender for a game that also gives you a succubus who basically turns you into a walking cum dispenser if you are not careful with your choices. The succubus events are surprisingly mechanical too, tied to your combat progress and “energy” in a way that can really screw your runs if you let her drain you dry in one of those animated footjobs or slow, teasing oral sessions where she pretends she is doing you a favor. There is light incest teasing from one of the new girls that made me roll my eyes, because it goes right to that line and dances on it longer than needed, but the game clearly knows its audience and doesn’t apologize. Some routes feel like a dating sim with actual romance, some like pure porn logic, and sometimes the same girl flips between genuine warmth and cartoonish ahegao in the span of one conversation. It can be whiplash. Still, the mix of teasing, exhibitionism in town events, and little scenes where the male protagonist is clearly still a virgin at heart trying to act like a harem king gives it this strange, almost honest undercurrent. He is not a noble hero, he is just a horny isekai loser who somehow ended surrounded by big tits, big asses, a few monster girls, and way too many chances to make the worst possible choice. Which, to be fair, is kind of the point.

You start as this broke college guy walking into Burgmeister & Royce like you’re gonna fix your life, then the game just grabs you by the dick and drags you into absolute chaos. Classes? Technically there. But the real “curriculum” is trying not to cum in your pants every five minutes while sorority girls flash you during a stupid drinking game, your landlady “forgets” to close her bathroom door, and your so-called bros push you into shit you know your dad would beat your ass for if he saw it. It’s that filthy campus fantasy where everyone’s way too hot, way too horny, and somehow nobody ever remembers underwear exists.

The sex stuff doesn’t even wait politely. One minute you’re doing some harmless point and click around your crappy dorm room and the next you’re peeping through a slightly open door, catching twins in a lesbian makeout session that is very much not “innocent experimenting.” They drag you in if you pick the right lines and suddenly you’re in this messy tangle of tongues, fingers, one of them riding your face while the other forces your cock between her tits and laughs in your ear about how fast you’re shaking. Later you can pretend you’re a romantic guy, taking a shy virgin girl on a normal date, hand in hand, giggling, then end the night with her masturbating in your lap inside a parked car because she “isn’t ready for penetration yet” but still wants your cum all over her stomach. The game swings from sweet to downright filthy in like two clicks and never apologizes.

What surprised me is how much it leans into power stuff without making it feel like a cheap porn menu. Sometimes you’re the one groping, pulling panties down behind a bar counter while your milf boss pretends she doesn’t notice, and sometimes you end up on your knees with a dominant school queen slapping you with a strap-on, telling you to open wider while her roommate records it on her phone through the keyhole. There’s this whole turn based combat thing tied to frat wars and campus gangs that looks silly at first, then suddenly you’re planning who to bring to a fight because winning opens new prostitution side gigs and losing might end with a humiliating scene where the rival guys use your girl for group sex while you’re forced to watch, dick hard and useless. I wish the game let you punch one particular smug asshole in the balls during a combat segment, it just sits there in my head every time that scene plays. Anyway, between interracial threesomes in trashy motel rooms, anal quickies in the library stacks, puzzle bits to unlock voyeur routes, and that one lesbian romance that somehow feels more emotional than all your straight routes combined, it’s less like a clean dating sim and more like getting lost in the filthiest campus rumor mill ever, where every rumor turns into a clickable scene and half of them end with a creampie dripping down someone’s thigh.

Phone Story looks harmless when it loads, like one of those cheap mobile chat sims you open on Chrome while pretending to check Slack. It is not harmless. It is that slow, nasty itch in the back of your head if you like watching “what if my girl had someone else in her DMs” kind of stuff. You play the husband who goes away, but honestly the main character is Lisa’s damn phone. Half the game is you reading her messages and deciding how much rope you want to give her, then pulling it back too late. You don’t click through some porn slideshow and right into “she’s on a couch with a giant dick in her.” The game takes its time. First it’s just flirty texts, a photo with “is this too much?” kind of teasing, her asking your opinion, your “friend” dropping those little comments that sound harmless until you reread them in incognito at work and realize you’re basically writing your own cuck script.

The pacing is weirdly strong for a messy hentai VN. Sometimes one choice just makes her send a slightly spicier selfie, sometimes it jumps right into a scene where she’s on video call, touching herself, trying to convince you it’s “for you” while that friend’s name keeps popping at the top of the screen. Classic anime-wife look, soft face, kinda innocent expression, but you can watch the corruption slide in bit by bit. She starts dressing more revealing, talking about “just hanging out” with him, a little wine, harmless cuddling, totally not cheating, right? Sure. Then you get those AI-looking CGs where she’s on her knees, lips glossy, your friend’s bbc in front of her mouth, and she’s still typing some sweet romantic bullshit to you with the other hand. The game loves making you stare at chat bubbles while she’s getting filled somewhere offscreen or in a small mirrored reflection. Proper voyeurism energy. The actual sex scenes hit all the usual spots, vaginal, anal, her pinned to a table, riding, messy facials, the whole thing, but the part that sticks is when she looks happy and guilty at the same time and you know it’s half for you and half for herself. Sometimes the writing slips and a line sounds like it came out of Google Translate, but honestly that kinda fits the vibe. On Android Chrome the text boxes get too big and cover half the art, which annoys the hell out of me, and if you tap too fast you skip a good line and there’s no quick log button right in your face, you have to dig for it. Also one route feels like it jumps from “maybe I’ll flirt” to “raw creampie from your buddy” in like two clicks, like the dev got horny and forgot the slow burn. Still, if you’re into netorare or softer netorase stuff, that moment when you tell her “yeah, explore a bit, just don’t forget me” and later you’re literally watching her try anal for the first time with someone else because you told her it’s fine, that hits way harder than it has any right to. And yeah, sometimes you tell her to stay faithful and the game almost seems annoyed, like “are you sure you don’t want to watch?” but then it gives you these surprisingly sweet romantic scenes where she masturbates with the phone propped up, moaning your name while she’s already mentally halfway to the neighbor’s bedroom. Not subtle at all, but that’s kind of the point.