Didn’t think I’d even bother with another “casting couch” parody, but WaifuHub kinda trapped me there for a while. It’s one of those browser things that pretends to be ironic, except it isn’t, or maybe it is, I don’t even know anymore. You play as the guy behind the camera, interviewing all these anime girls you’ve seen a million times before - 2B shows up all confident and stiff, Raphtalia’s nervous like she’s in a real audition, and Lucoa just… well, she’s Lucoa, she doesn’t care what anyone thinks. The voice acting’s weirdly uneven, and sometimes the moans cut out at random, which somehow made it more real? Like catching some clumsy home-recording vibe. But yeah, the animations hit that point between funny and hot. You’ll laugh when Galko starts her self-introduction too seriously and then forgets she’s supposed to be seducing you, and then it hits you - you’re actually into this.

What got me wasn’t even the sex scenes (well, okay, some of them). It’s that stupid fake dialogue right before things go wild. Meiko saying she’s “totally professional” and then two sentences later losing it on camera - it’s dumb but oddly human. I kept noticing small stuff: the sound of sandals scraping, the way hands twitch when the pace changes. The dev probably didn’t plan half of that; it’s just dirty accident magic. Though I swear the skip button hates me - it freezes every other time I touch it. Doesn’t matter though, since you end up watching everything twice anyway. And Cheelai? She breaks the fourth wall once and it ruined me, I laughed so hard I forgot I was supposed to jerk off.

Somewhere around Mitsuki’s scene I caught myself thinking about how strange it is that we build whole universes of desire around characters that started out as jokes for teenage boys. Then I gave up thinking because Mina’s turn came and - yeah. Animation’s rough around the edges, lines are bad, the logic is nonsense, but damn if it doesn’t feel alive in that broken way cheap porn sometimes does. I still can’t figure out why 2B blushes differently depending on the camera angle. Maybe it’s intentional. Probably not. Doesn’t matter.

Tali is absolutely not the shy little quarian tech nerd people remember from the original games. Here she’s more like the center of a very rude quiz show where every question is “How far are you willing to go this time?” and the answer keeps getting filthier. The story picks up after she escapes this messed up ghost ship, and instead of going back to anything safe, she ends up bouncing around space with a bunch of “friends” who have very specific ideas about what to do with her suit, her body, and her obedience. One moment you’re in a legit combat scene, trying to manage shields and positioning, and the next moment losing a fight means Tali is on her knees, visor fogged, being used like a trophy by whatever monster just wrecked you. And yeah, the camera really loves her ass. Whoever built those shots deserves an award. Maybe “Excessive Focus On Tali’s Butt” gold medal.

The game kind of feels like a horny Mass Effect quiz where every choice is secretly: a) blowjob, b) anal, c) corruption, d) all of the above. You run around in this sandbox structure, poke different parts of the ship or station, and suddenly you’re in some awkward scene with Liara teasing her while EDI throws dry comments in the background like she’s hosting a porn podcast. One of my favorite dumb moments: I was half-tabbing out to check Discord, left a teasing scene running with Tali “practicing” oral on some alien cock, came back and she had switched positions and was riding instead because I let the idle animation chain continue. No tooltip, no pop up, just “you ignored the scene, now she’s even more corrupted, congrats.” It’s janky in spots, the animations sometimes loop too obviously, and Kasumi just kind of appears, steals the spotlight with a handjob scene, then vanishes again like a horny ninja. Never explained properly, and the game just shrugs and moves on.

What’s nice is how it leans fully into parody without being shy about anything. Miranda’s big tits are used exactly how you think, Ashley is still an uptight soldier but now her idea of discipline is getting Tali to “follow orders” with vaginal and anal rewards, and somewhere in the middle Shepard is there, but half of the time feels like a side character in his own porn. The corruption aspect creeps up on you in a stupidly fun way: early Tali is awkward, blushing, touching herself alone in a quiet room, just masturbation and a bit of teasing. A few bad fights lost, some “training” with Shiala and Samara, one very wrong encounter with a slime-like monster, and suddenly she’s the one grabbing cocks first, begging for more, suit open in places you’re pretty sure are not Alliance regulation. It’s dirty, it’s uneven, it repeats a couple of angles too much, and the UI sometimes hides a choice you swear should be there. But when she bends over in zero-g and the whole scene turns into this slow, weightless anal fuck with her gasping inside the helmet, you kind of forget what you were annoyed about. Or what you were doing before the scene started. Or why Jira is still open in another tab.

You start as this kinda clueless guy who just wants some easy cash delivering pizza, and suddenly you’re knee deep in a beach resort that feels like it was designed by a horny god with zero HR rules. The whole thing plays like a goofy visual novel that keeps tripping over its own jokes, then somehow landing face first in some really filthy scenes. One second you’re checking a delivery address in a half-busted menu, next second the door opens and there’s a stacked blonde in a bikini top that can’t decide if it’s clothing or suggestion. The game doesn’t even pretend to be serious. You get into these dialogues where you try to sound professional while staring at gigantic tits that basically have their own gravity, and half your choices feel like: “Be polite” or “Accidentally flirt like a horny idiot.” And both usually lead to trouble, just different flavors of it.

What I liked is how they use the “pizza boy” thing as an excuse to throw you into all kinds of weird situations. Like, there’s this delivery to the green haired girl at the pool, and the scene starts normal, just small talk about the order, some dumb jokes about extra cheese, whatever. Then she stretches on the deck chair, her bikini bottom rides up, you get a close-up cg that is absolutely not subtle, and you suddenly notice this small dialogue branch that was easy to miss. If you pick it, she starts teasing you about tips. Not money tips. The tension ramps up quick. The writing is still trying to be funny, but the cg is already full hentai mode, uncensored, skin shining like she’s been soaked in sunscreen for an hour. I had that moment of “ok this is stupid” while at the same time scrolling back to check if there was a way to push the scene even further. Spoiler: there kinda is, but you need to be a bit of an asshole earlier with another girl at the beach bar, which I found by accident. Totally not replay-safe if you pretend to be a good guy all the time.

Then there is the scientist. She shows up like the game took a wrong turn out of Pornhub and fell into some cheap sci fi parody. Lab coat barely closed, tattoos poking from underneath, talking about “testing new code” in the resort system and acting like your dick is part of the experiment. There are bugged text boxes sometimes, stuff flickers, and instead of fixing it she sort of leans into it and starts breaking the fourth wall in this teasing way. She literally blames “code bugs” for why her top keeps disappearing in the cg gallery, like it is a glitch and not that the artist just wanted her naked in every variant. You get this optional scene where she asks you to deliver “special pizza” to her lab at night, and the whole route goes from light comedy to full hentai lab fantasy. Restraints, scanners, her sitting on your lap pretending she is calibrating something, and your choices change tiny details in the cg: glasses on or off, open coat, how rough it gets. It’s not super deep, but it felt more playful than most jam stuff I’ve seen.

The resort itself is full of beach clichés, in a good trashy way. Redhead lifeguard with a body that looks like it violates health and safety, fake wholesome smile, then you notice the way the camera angle keeps dropping to her chest when she “checks your pulse.” There’s a scene where she pretends you might be dehydrated and drags you to the shade. Absolutely no medical training in that scene, just wet lips, tan lines, and an excuse to slide her hand too low when she is “making sure your heart is fine.” The game lets you pick if you play along or try to act innocent, but both paths are horny, just with different banter. The humor is actually not terrible. It’s dumb, meme-ish, full of throwaway lines about late orders and bad mobile data, like someone wrote it while doomscrolling Twitter and watching hentai at the same time. My only real complaint is that sometimes it feels like the choices tease something big and then you just get the same cg with one line changed, but maybe that fits this whole lazy resort mood.

Some of the best bits are smaller things that almost feel like inside jokes for people who crawl adult VN sites too much. There’s a moment where a blonde customer says “don’t worry, I’m legal, this isn’t that kind of game” and then immediately asks you to help rub lotion into places the camera very clearly wants to focus on. Another time, a text popup bugs out and repeats three times, and instead of hiding it they let the scientist comment on how your “route flag is stuck” while her hand slowly moves offscreen on your body in the cg. Stuff like that makes it feel like everyone involved knew exactly what type of trashy, horny beach story they were making and just ran with it. It’s rough, sometimes clumsy, a bit all over the place, and the girls are drawn with that exaggerated hentai logic where every boob looks heavier than your whole torso. But when you are in the middle of a scene, watching sweat drip between giant tits while you’re still holding a pizza box in the corner of the frame, it kind of just clicks. You’re not here for perfect pacing. You’re here because a part-time job at a resort full of hot women and broken code is the exact porn plot your brain secretly wanted and never asked for out loud.

It starts quiet, like one of those evenings when you swear you’re just checking something small before bed. I thought it was gonna be a quick “help Melory with homework” kind of clicker thing, but nah - this thing gets under your skin fast. The tension builds and then tilts sideways; suddenly you’re the guy making dumb choices while a soft-spoken girl grins like she knows exactly what you’ll do next. It doesn’t feel scripted half the time, more like an awkward memory you’re re-living. The way her voice dips right before teasing a boundary - that’s what caught me. You don’t even realize how deep the game wants to push until every tiny decision spirals into something filthier, or sweeter, depending on your mood.

The strangest part? I actually cared about the damn story for a second. There’s this older woman - Melory’s mom maybe, can’t remember - and she pulls off that fake calm thing way too well. One minute you’re blushing through a foot scene, next she’s lecturing you like some goddess who read your search history. And yeah, it’s heavy on the domination bits, anal teases, stuff that’d make your phone pause mid-loadscreen, but somehow none of it feels cheap. Even the sleep scenes - they make you uncomfortable in that weird way where you still click *next* without thinking. The ASMR moments are hit or miss, honestly; sometimes sexy as hell, other times they just sound like the mic brushing against a pillow, but whatever, it fits the messy, intimate rhythm of the game.

I hate that bottle mini-game though. It’s supposed to be random, but I swear it always lands on the person I didn’t want stripped that round. Maybe that’s the point? It messes with you, keeps that frustration humming right between curiosity and guilt. By the time things twist into those cross-path routes - with trans, maid, interracial, even golden shower endings - you kinda stop worrying about which kink is next and just ride the chaos. The mix of control and shame here works almost too well. Makes you breathe slower. Or hold it. Hard to tell which.