You start as this kinda clueless guy dumped into a “totally not official” region, phone in one hand, half a chub in the other, and suddenly you’re supposed to be both monster trainer and professional horndog. The game plays it like a classic monster RPG, turn based fights and all, but every win feels more like you’re grinding Tinder than grinding levels. You throw balls at monsters, then five minutes later you’re throwing something else at Misty in a changing room. I was half expecting it to be all tease, but nope, it goes hard on the porn side. Big asses, big tits, tiny shorts, way too much bending over. Cynthia shows up with that smug “I know you’re staring at my boobs” energy, and the game absolutely rewards you for being a thirsty idiot. You can wander around like a sandbox, poke into houses you clearly shouldn’t, get sidetracked by some milf asking for “help with her Pokémon” who definitely does not mean her Pokémon. At one point I was supposed to go beat a gym and instead spent 30 minutes trying to trigger a specific sex scene with Nessa because someone on a Reddit thread said it was animated differently on the second try. They were right, by the way. Worth it.

The pickup line stuff hit me harder than I expected. You actually choose dialogue in some scenes, and it feels like speed dating with cheat codes turned off. One option is polite, one is horny, one is just straight up degenerate. I tested them like a weirdo doing field research. On Telegram I even sent screenshots to a language exchange buddy asking “does this line sound like a real fuckboy?” He said yes and I felt strangely proud. Sometimes being bold pays off and Misty basically jumps your dick in the locker after a battle. Other times you try something dirty on Dawn, and she goes “wow, creepy” and the scene turns colder, you still get sex later, but the vibe is different, more rough, less cuddly. It actually teaches you something weird about tone, even if the game itself is mostly about shoving your cock into every trainer with a pulse. The monsters are just there like foreplay excuses, beat one, unlock a new way to rail someone. I wish there was an option to mute the moaning without muting sound effects, but the game doesn’t care what I want and honestly that fits. At one point I forgot the main quest completely and just walked in circles trying new lines on Cynthia to see which one made her blush the most. Felt like using OkCupid in a fantasy world where every match wants to fuck you five minutes after small talk. Dare to play it alone, or invite company?

RuleUniverse feels like someone mashed Dragon Ball fanfiction, horny Twitter art and a half-finished Ren’Py project, then accidentally made it kind of addictive. You start as this lonely overachiever kid that reads like every shonen protagonist in history, then a demon scientist pops up and says, “hey, let’s stuff your body with DNA from the strongest fighters in the universe, what could go wrong.” It’s delightfully stupid in that fanfic way, but precisely because of that, it works. The game knows it’s a parody, it doesn’t try to pretend it’s “deep”, and then it suddenly throws in a line about destiny or guiding the universe and you’re like… alright, Toriyama-with-horny-mods, calm down.

The real fun is how transparently it worships its women. Bulma, Chi-Chi, Android 18, that whole legendary boob-and-ass pantheon is here, clearly shaped by someone who grew up pausing VHS at the worst places. The models are 3D and exaggerated as hell: huge tits, fat asses, those shiny anime lips that just scream “she’s going to suck him off in like two clicks.” Animated scenes actually move, not just two stiff characters rubbing like broken Sims; you get thrusting, jiggling, drool, that soft spit string when you pull out from a blowjob, all the little pervy details that tell you the dev really wanted this for themselves first. One moment you’re doing basic combat with ki blasts and energy auras, the next you’re balls-deep in Bulma in a lab, with wires and science junk in the background like that somehow makes it ethical. And the combat’s funny: it pretends to be serious, but all you’re thinking is “okay, how many fights until I unlock the next sex scene with Android 18.” Sometimes the sandbox part feels less like a “world” and more like a small playground with a fence around it, but the loops of walking around, clicking, triggering small events, slowly unlocking more lewd stuff… it scratched that same spot as old flash games I used to sneak at school on shitty browsers.

I kinda love how messy it is. The romance tries to act sentimental for a second, then five lines later you’re face-fucking a milf with magic powers while she moans like someone recorded it in a bathroom on a cheap mic. Dialog swings from “I will guide the universe” to “fuck me harder” without the slightest shame. Exploration is simple, a little repetitive, but I still kept wandering, poking every corner hoping there’s a hidden event where Chi-Chi finally snaps and rides the protagonist like he’s the last Saiyan on earth. Some text sounds like it was written at midnight by a dude half-remembering DBZ arcs from YouTube AMVs, which, honestly, is the right energy. I do wish the world reacted more to what you do, like if you bang Bulma enough, Vegeta starts showing up mad or something, but I know that kind of feature is exactly the thing that stays in the dev’s “maybe later” notes forever. Still, when you’re watching Android 18 slowly drop to her knees after you save her in a fight and she rewards you with this sloppy, animated blowjob, with her tits barely contained and that quiet smug smile when she swallows, it hits the trashy, horny, teen-power-fantasy nerve in a very specific way. It’s not elegant. It’s not smart. It’s like a wet doujin turned half-game, half-daydream, and somehow that’s exactly why it sticks.

Kat’s life is a total mess in the most fun way. One minute she is half naked on stream with cat ears on, milking subs while pretending to “struggle” with some puzzle game, the next she is in a real classroom solving math problems faster than the teacher. Same girl, same big ass stuffed into a way too tight skirt, completely different masks. The game throws you right into that chaos. You are basically riding shotgun in her head while she flips between being the shy nerdy student, the thirsty gamer girl who loves when chat spams emotes, and the bratty little slut who knows exactly how to use her body to get what she wants. It is not subtle. She flashes tits on camera, teases her stepmom in the kitchen while pretending nothing is happening, then goes to campus like her pussy wasn’t just dripping on a gaming chair. Also I swear whoever modeled her boobs is a pervert, they bounce even when she just breathes. That’s praise by the way. Mostly.

The school stuff hits different than usual porn VN trash. You are doing these light puzzle moments and math mini bits while she is literally texting two people she is fucking at the same time. Girlfriend asking if she can come over and “study,” professor sending a voice message about “private tutoring.” You know exactly what kind of oral exam is coming and you still click it. There is this classroom scene where she solves a problem at the board, chalk dust on her fingers, skirt riding up, and you can feel the prof staring at her ass. Later he has her on that same desk, panties around one ankle, hand clamped on the back of her neck while he buries her face in the notebook she used earlier. Creampie on the page with all the equations. Real high level education. And the voice acting helps too. Kat moans through her teeth when she tries to stay quiet, girlfriend’s voice goes all soft when she slides down between Kat’s legs, the stepmom has this deep, lazy “I own you” tone that will probably ruin some people forever. Sometimes the moans sound a bit too clean, like recorded in a padded room, and it pulls you out for a second, but then you get a wet choking sound during a blowjob and forget what you were annoyed about.

What really sticks is how filthy the house feels without actually being dirty. Kitchen looks normal, but you know the stepmom has fucked her there. There is this voyeur moment where Kat sneaks to the door, watches her stepmom stroke herself on the couch, fat cock in her hand, phone in the other, and you can see Kat bite her lip, fingers already under her shorts. The game loves exhibitionism too. She does a cosplay stream in a “safe” school uniform, then slowly unbuttons it while reading dumb messages from chat. At one point she “accidentally” sets the camera a bit too low and you get that perfect under table view while she gives a secret handjob off screen. Only it is not off screen for you. And then you get lesbian scenes with the girlfriend that are full on soft and romantic until Kat just grabs her head and rides her face like she is farming XP. Then later she calls her the “good girl” and you remember that Kat is not actually the victim here, she is the one juggling everyone. The pacing is weird sometimes, it jumps from goofy humor to incest tension to futa domination in a few clicks, like someone flicking TV channels with one hand while masturbating with the other, but that kind of fits. This is exactly the sort of game where a girl solves a math puzzle, sucks a cock as reward, then wipes her mouth and goes back to streaming like nothing happened. And I still hate the tiny mouse cursor in the main menu for some reason, it looks like it belongs in Windows 98, but yeah, anyway.

This thing throws you right into Luna’s brain like she just walked out of some cute fairy anime and then got slapped in the face with Pornhub. She lands in this sleepy little village that looks all soft and cozy at first, flowers everywhere, people smiling too much, that fake kind of wholesome you see in small town Instagram pics. Then you start talking to folks and realize half the town is backed up and horny and the other half is busy pretending sex doesn’t exist, and you’re basically hired as the official “please fuck everyone before the world breaks” girl. Luna’s this tiny fey girl with huge eyes and a body that absolutely doesn’t match her clueless personality, big tits bouncing when she runs around doing “quests” that are really just setups for sex scenes pretending to be favors. It goes from cute to filthy in like three clicks, and the shift actually works, because she never really stops being sweet even when she’s covered in cum and asking who’s next.

What surprised me is how the game mixes the management stuff with the actual porn. You’re not just clicking through dialog to reach a CG. You’re checking Luna’s lust vs restraint, choosing if she plays hard to get or just drops to her knees the moment someone even hints at wanting a blowjob. I had one scene where she went to “comfort” this nervous girl from the celibacy cult, and depending on your stats it either stays soft with tender kissing and slow, shivery groping or it flips into Luna pushing the girl against the wall and making her whimper while she eats her out. The lesbian content is honestly the best part here, the dev clearly likes women actually enjoying themselves, not just moaning for the camera. There’s this one bit with a monster girl who’s way taller than Luna, thick thighs, big ass, extra limbs doing their own thing, and Luna’s just hanging off her like a toy while getting absolutely stuffed. It looks ridiculous and hot at the same time, especially when the monster girl keeps teasing her, holding her just out of reach of orgasm until Luna’s begging and drooling and promises to be a “good village toy.” I thought I’d hate the corruption angle, but watching Luna slowly go from “oh my, is this okay?” to casually asking if someone wants their pussy or their ass first kind of sneaks up on you, and suddenly the innocent fairy girl is the one pushing sex toys into cult ladies and telling them they’ll sleep better with a creampie.

The tone jumps all over the place, in a good way and also in a “what the fuck are we doing” way. One scene is goofy, like Luna streaking across a field because some pervy shrine spirit only listens to naked people, and she’s half embarrassed and half giggling while villagers pretend not to stare. Next scene there’s this dark church basement where lust is literally warping reality, and you’ve got tentacly shapes hugging her thighs, sliding under her clothes, making her moan and blush while she’s trying to look brave. The game keeps teasing exhibitionism, like Luna getting used to people watching her, breasts out, ass grabbed, someone’s tongue in her mouth while another hand pushes her thighs apart. Then later you bump into a stupid little issue like the UI hiding half a dialogue choice and it annoys the hell out of you, but you forget that once she’s riding some big guy, tits bouncing, her expression going from nervous to “fuck, harder” in a few frames. The humor actually lands most of the time, especially when Luna tries to be “professional” about giving happy endings and treats it like customer service on crack. One moment she’s politely asking a woman if she prefers fingers or tongue, next moment an eldritch goddess that looks like a horny sea nightmare is using her like a toy, and Luna’s trying to keep it together while getting filled from angles that don’t even make sense. The best part is when her restraint is low and she starts teasing others first, grinding on a shy girl’s lap, guiding some flustered villager’s hands to her tits, whispering dirty things in a tone that still sounds like a fairy offering you flowers. It shouldn’t work. It kind of shouldn’t even be this hot. But here we are.