This Resident Evil parody throws you straight into Lady Dimitrescu's castle, and honestly? The devs knew exactly what they were doing. You're playing some poor bastard who's gotta survive Alcina's "trial" - which basically means getting dominated by a nine-foot vampire mommy and her equally stacked daughters. The turn-based combat system feels clunky at first, like they copy-pasted it from some RPG maker tutorial, but once you realize the real gameplay is about managing your stamina while getting your face buried in supernatural cleavage, it starts making sense. There's this one scene where Dimitrescu pins you against the wall and the camera angle is just... chef's kiss. The 3DCG models look decent enough, though Lady D's proportions are so exaggerated she looks like she'd topple over in real life.

Combat encounters blend into these weird BDSM scenarios where losing actually feels like winning. You'll find yourself deliberately failing just to see what creative punishment awaits. The spanking animations have more effort put into them than the actual sword fighting mechanics, which tells you where the priorities were. Sandbox elements let you explore the castle freely, groping your way through dark corridors while avoiding or seeking out the various monster girls lurking around. Some of the dialogue during sex scenes made me laugh out loud - not sure if that was intentional. The ahegao faces during climax moments are over-the-top ridiculous but somehow work within this campy horror-porn aesthetic.

What really caught me off guard was how they handled the size difference fetish stuff. Tall vs short dynamics play out in every interaction, from handjobs where your character can barely reach to titfuck scenes that look physically impossible. The harem aspect kicks in later when you're juggling multiple supernatural ladies, each with their own domination preferences. Voice acting ranges from surprisingly good to hilariously bad, but the moaning sounds authentic enough. Fair warning though - the grinding gets repetitive and some animations loop awkwardly.

The sky in 2059 is this ugly, sick orange, like somebody pissed on the sunset and never cleaned it. You play a guy who basically grew up in that shit, no nostalgia for the old world, no “remember when we had internet” crying. Just concrete bones of cities, blown-out highways, and horny, desperate survivors who learned pretty fast that a hard cock and a sharp weapon can both save your life, just in different ways. The whole thing is built around trying not to die while everyone around you is trying not to wear clothes. You wander through ruined malls that look like war museums, find half-melted billboards with smiling people from before, and then two minutes later you’re in a scav camp where some big-titted raider queen is laughing while she makes a guy strip naked in front of everyone because he lost a bet. She tells you to choose if you wanna join in humiliating him, help him, or just watch and jerk off behind a broken vending machine. And the fucked up part is that all three options feel valid.

What sells the game for me is how it mixes “oh shit I could die” with “oh shit I’m hard” in the same scene. Like you’ll be low on food, trading bullets for a place to sleep in an underground bunker, and the guy in charge says the only open bed is already taken by his sister. You expect some cliché, but she’s the one who looks you up and down, this tall woman with thighs like she squats cars, and asks if you have any “special talents.” You can brag about your combat skills, or you can say something like “I’m good with my hands.” That tiny choice flips everything. In one route she tests you in a training room soaked with blood and sweat, in another she just grabs your belt, shoves you against the wall, and makes you prove it with her tits bouncing in your face while her brother “guards the door” and politely pretends he doesn’t hear her moaning loud enough to wake the dead. It’s gross. It’s hot. It’s weirdly funny. And somehow you still care if your character survives the night and doesn’t bleed out later in some sewer tunnel full of feral mutants.

There’s this scene that stuck with me where you’re escorting a small group through a ruined overpass. Wind howling, chunks of car skeletons everywhere, that feeling that someone is watching. You can choose to sneak slow and careful, or move fast and loud to scare off scavengers. I picked fast, like an idiot. Snipers open fire, one of your companions gets her leg shot and you have to drag her into cover. She’s this smug, curvy trader who kept flirting with you earlier, joking she’d “pay in kind” if you helped her find a safe town. When the bullets stop and it’s just the sound of her breathing hard, she asks you to cut her pants open to check the wound. You kneel between her spread legs, knife in hand, and instead of panicking she starts teasing you, saying “You’re blushing more than I’m bleeding.” You get this choice: focus on first aid like a good little boy, or let the tension flip into something filthy right there behind a burned-out truck. If you go lewd, you’re literally eating her out while she winces and laughs, leg wrapped in a bloody bandage, telling you to go faster before someone spots you. It shouldn’t be sexy. It absolutely is. And somehow that moment changes how she talks to you later when you run out of supplies and she offers to “share body heat” in a cold storage room that’s definitely not cold anymore by the time you’re done. The game keeps doing that. Serious survival, then stupid horny, then a joke about pre-war porn nobody gets anymore, then someone’s brains explode on a wall. It’s messy, and that’s exactly why it works.

Dorian is stuck in bed, leg in a cast, body useless, phone in his hand. That’s pretty much your whole world at the start. No heroic shit, no big fantasy prophecy, just a guy who can’t move from the waist down fast enough to stop his own life falling apart a few meters away. His wife Claire is supposed to be his angel in a maid outfit, the one bringing meds, food, and those soft tits he remembers fucking in the shower. Instead, she’s half dressed, skirt riding up, always bending over a little too slow when Shad is around. And Shad is always around now, “helping with bills”, staying over, walking around the apartment like he already owns the place. The game just lets you sit there and watch, phone lighting up with group chat messages while you hear them giggle in the next room. It feels like being pinned under a truck and forced to listen to your own sex life being auctioned off.

Most of the action is on that damn phone. Group chat first, the three of you trading jokes, dumb memes, horny teasing that you try to control but never really do. You can reply, stay cool and “mature”, or poke at them, or act needy, and the vibe shifts a little. But no matter what you pick, the tension keeps crawling up. Claire starts posting pics in that cheap maid uniform you picked as a joke during character creation, but somehow her cleavage gets lower every time. At first it’s “haha look I’m cosplaying as your nurse”, and Shad drops the classic “damn bro you’re lucky” line. Later it’s “I’m helping him relax” with a shot where you can clearly see her hand is not on your shoulder, it’s way under the blanket, and the expression on Shad’s reaction emoji tells you everything. There are animated bits where the phone screen shakes a little as you scroll through a chat log full of her pussy shots, her lips around his cock, your own wife riding a dick and sending you the proof like it’s just another funny sticker pack. It’s half voyeur game, half emotional torture device, and the math part of my brain started counting routes like they were failure states.

I kept tracking where the branches split: when you stay polite versus when you blow up, when you flirt back and pretend the whole situation is just some kinky roleplay, when you play the “I don’t care, fuck whoever you want” card and secretly hope she stops. The cheating is not hidden at all, it’s right in front of you, in your chat history, on your gallery, in the moans you hear through the wall when the door is “accidentally” left open. There are scenes where she gives you a lazy handjob while whispering messages to Shad on her phone, her thumb typing over your orgasm. There is a titfuck scene where you can hear through voice messages that she did the same thing to him ten minutes earlier, with more enthusiasm. Sometimes the game lets you choose if you watch the live cam she sends him when she’s on her knees sucking his cock, or if you mute it and stare at the ceiling like a broken robot. I tried both and still felt like shit. It tries to dress itself up as romance sometimes, like you can win her back, but every “maybe we can fix this” moment is followed by another clip of her bouncing on his lap, moaning his name louder than she ever said yours. And yeah, there is a bit of humor, some parody vibe of generic dating sims, like a cursed maid café route that turned into a full harem where you’re the only guy who never gets to actually own anything. But under the jokes, it’s still one long, messy porn chat log where your wife chooses someone else while you sit there, statistics in your head, counting every little choice and still losing her in almost every timeline.

Luke's got this whole university thing figured out - or at least he thinks he does. This isn't your typical college romance where some awkward freshman stumbles through dating mishaps. Nah, Luke's been through this rodeo before, literally. Time loops, resets, whatever you want to call it - he's lived his first year over and over until he's basically gaming the system. Now he's ready for what he calls "Phase Two," which sounds way more strategic than it probably should be for a guy just trying to get laid.

The whole premise is pretty wild when you think about it. Luke's essentially become a relationship speedrunner, knowing exactly which buttons to push with each girl. There's this maid cafe setup that becomes central to everything - because of course there is. The game throws you into managing relationships with different girls who each have their own specific kinks and fetishes. One minute you're dealing with some vanilla romance situation, next thing you know you're deep in BDSM territory or watching some serious NTR unfold. The variety is honestly overwhelming sometimes. You've got your classic anime parody characters mixed in too - I spotted what looked like Nico Robin and Boa Hancock variants, which feels both nostalgic and weird at the same time.

What gets me is how the game handles the whole "perfect base" concept Luke keeps talking about. It's like he's treating relationships like some kind of RPG stat management, which... honestly isn't that far from reality if we're being real here. The turn-based combat elements feel randomly thrown in, but somehow work with the overall simulator vibe. There's phone interactions, dating mechanics, and this whole corruption progression system that gets pretty intense. The multiple endings thing means you're constantly second-guessing your choices, wondering if you're optimizing for the right fetish path or missing out on some kinky scenario. Luke might have his advantage, but navigating all these relationship dynamics still feels like controlled chaos.