Ellie from that zombie game and Lara from those old temple raider days stuck together in one filthy, horny mess is already kind of illegal, but the way this thing uses their feet is what actually surprised me. It starts almost innocent, like some weird fanfic fantasy where a regular dude ends up with both of them under his control, and you think “ok ok, just another basic porn parody”. Then you realize the whole focus is on socks and how much abuse you can squeeze out of a single sweaty foot. The game treats socks like gear, like actual tools for humiliation, not just decoration. You’re pulling Ellie’s dirty socks off slow while she glares at you, toes curling, and Lara is in the background with those tight sport socks still on, being forced to stroke you off with them while acting all proud and pissed at the same time. It’s fucked up and kind of funny.

What I liked is how often it lets you push them from “annoyed” into “broken-in toy” during actual sex, not just in some text box. One scene that stuck with me: you’ve already used Ellie’s feet, made her rub you until she’s breathing hard and confused, and instead of jumping straight to normal penetration, you pin her down in missionary, keep her ankles pressed against your shoulders, and the camera keeps cutting back to her soles. Not her face, not your dick, just those feet twitching while you slam into her. Meanwhile Lara is ordered to kneel at the side, licking your balls like some obedient slave, still wearing one sock, and that stupid detail somehow makes it nastier. Then later you flip Lara into doggystyle, really rough, hair pulled, face pushed down, and she’s forced to rub you with her feet between thrusts, basically getting used like a multi tool. It’s actually a bit much when you chain everything together: harassment, domination, rough fucking, feet in your face, them gagging on you, and you keep going anyway because the game kind of encourages you to be a selfish bastard. At some point I realized the male protagonist doesn’t even feel like a “character”, he’s more like a cock with dialogue, but in this type of hardcore crossover it weirdly fits. The AI-generated CG sometimes looks slightly off, like Ellie’s toes bending wrong or Lara’s expression clipping into weird “half angry half bored” mode, yet those little imperfections give the scenes this trashy bootleg energy that matches the whole vibe. You’re not here for romance, or plot, or to be a good person. You’re here to grab two famous girls by the throat, use their mouths, their pussies, their asses, and especially their socks and feet, and then pretend later it was “just parody” when you close the tab.

Stormhill looks fancy at first, all gold roofs and clean streets, but the game makes it feel dirty in a good way pretty fast. You’re the spoiled heir everyone secretly hates, walking through this city like you own every brick, and yeah, you kind of do. But the best parts are when that rich boy attitude crashes right into raw, sweaty street sex. One moment you’re being polite in some high-class hall, the next you’ve got a girl with ridiculous tits bent over a balcony while the whole district is right under you. The camera loves to sit a bit back, like it’s peeking, so half the time you feel like a creep watching your own scenes. There’s this bit early on where you corner a girl who pretends she’s too proud for you, all noble and cold, and then two lines later she has your cock in her mouth, mascara smudging while you hold her head and just use her throat. I thought it would feel generic, but the way she slowly stops pushing your hands away and starts going deeper on her own… yeah, that stuck in my head way too long. I still hate the font they use in the dialogue though. It’s stupidly small on mobile and I keep squinting, then forgetting I was even mad once her ass jiggles again in the next animation.

What really works is how the “gang building” thing is just an excuse to collect a harem that all needs to be put in their place. They say you’re trying to escape your father’s control, but half your choices are about how hard you’re going to control everyone else. There’s this scene in a dusty warehouse where you’re “negotiating” with a rival’s girl. Negotiation ends with her pinned against some crates, panties pushed to the side, and you sliding into her while she’s still trying to talk big. You grab her tits, they’re huge and soft, and you can watch the exact second she breaks, legs wrapping around you while you pound her ass so hard the boxes behind her start shaking. The game lets you choose to finish in her or pull out, but be honest, nobody is pulling out here. The creampie close-ups are stupidly detailed, like the camera gets almost too close, cum leaking back out while she’s still trembling and whispering your name. Later, there’s an alley scene where you’re supposed to just watch two side girls fool around, licking each other and grinding, and I swear I was planning to keep it “romantic”, then the option to join pops up and suddenly you’re shoving your dick into one while the other sits on your face. I think I hated that scene. Yeah. Totally hated it. The anal bits hit harder than I expected too, especially one rooftop moment where you press a girl against the railing, slide into her pussy first, get her all wet and noisy, then slowly push into her ass while she claws at the stone and begs you not to stop. It’s rough, it’s messy, and the game loves to linger on your hands groping every curve like they belong to you already. I opened it “just to test it” on my phone while waiting for a food delivery, and fifteen minutes later I’m hunched over my screen, thumb tapping through dialogue, completely forgetting I even ordered anything. The story tries to play deep with empires and politics and all that, but it honestly works better when it drops the serious act and just lets you be the absolute bastard king of a city full of big tits, big asses, and mouths that keep saying no while their bodies do something very different.

Frank's prison break goes about as well as you'd expect - which is to say, absolutely terrible. One shipwreck later and this guy's washing up in Bikini Bottom looking like he got chewed up by Davy Jones himself. But here's where things get weird (and I mean WEIRD): instead of doing the sensible thing like finding help or maybe not impersonating cartoon characters, Frank decides the best survival strategy is pretending to be SpongeBob. Yeah, that SpongeBob. The yellow square dude who flips patties and annoys his neighbors.

What starts as a desperate con job turns into something way more fucked up than you bargained for. Frank's not just wearing the square pants - he's living the whole twisted fantasy, and apparently everyone in Bikini Bottom is way more... accommodating than the original show ever suggested. Sandy's got that Texas-sized appetite for more than just science experiments, if you catch my drift. The animation work is surprisingly smooth for what's basically underwater cartoon porn, though sometimes the character expressions look like they're having existential crises mid-scene. Can't blame them honestly. The sandbox elements let you wander around causing chaos at your own pace, which is perfect because rushing through this fever dream would be doing it a disservice. You'll find yourself clicking through dialogue just to see how much more absurd Frank's situation can get, and trust me, it gets pretty damn absurd.

The whole thing feels like someone took childhood nostalgia, threw it in a blender with adult fantasies, and hit the "completely unhinged" setting. Frank's supposed to be this hardened criminal but half the time he's bumbling around like he's never seen a talking starfish before. The male domination stuff works better than it should given the source material, probably because everyone's so committed to the bit. It's crude, it's ridiculous, and somehow that makes the sexy parts hit different. Just don't expect any deep character development - Frank's basically a horny plot device with commitment issues.

Henry’s Adventures starts all quiet and cozy in this little mountain village, and then five minutes later you’re balls deep in trouble, literally and not. You walk around thinking “ok, classic fantasy, nice trees, simple quests,” and then an elf girl with ears sharp enough to cut paper bends over a table and the camera just zooms in on that ridiculous ass like the game knows exactly why you’re here. It’s very honest like that. One second you’re talking about bandits, next second she’s on her knees, drool running down her lip while she works your cock with both hands, and the dialogue is trying so hard to stay serious that it becomes kind of funny. Henry himself is this young dude who looks a bit too clean to be hiking through monster nests, but the moment he starts fucking he goes full bully mode, grabbing hair, pushing heads down, stuffing girls full and then acting like it’s normal village routine.

What actually stuck with me is how horny the world itself feels. You go into a cave thinking “ok, some generic monster fight,” and instead there’s a thick green orc girl with arms like a gym bro and tits that almost spill out of her armor. She pins Henry to the rock wall and you think you’re dead, but it turns into this rough, messy scene where you end up fucking her stupid while her muscles twitch around you. Then later there’s this vampire chick in an old ruin, pale skin, red eyes, tits barely contained in that corset joke she’s wearing. She pretends she wants your blood, then drops down and starts licking your shaft like it’s some rare wine, slow and teasing, until you finally grab her head and fuck her face. The animation sells it well when she gags and her throat bulges around you, and when you finish she doesn’t just swallow, you actually see the cum spill out and slide down her chin before she smears it with her thumb and licks it. Real nice detail. Kind of annoying that sometimes the dialogue boxes cover exactly the part you want to watch, and you keep tapping on mobile praying you don’t accidentally skip the good frame, but whatever, I still kept going from scene to scene like a degenerate squirrel hunting nuts.

The game really loves threesomes too. At one point you stumble into a campfire scene with an orc girl and an elf sharing a drink, and somehow that turns into both of them arguing who rides you first. You lie on your back, elf bouncing on your cock, her big tits jumping everywhere, while the orc sits on your face and grinds so hard you almost feel it through the screen. When you pull out at the end and creampie the elf, it’s not just a quick white flash. It’s slow, you see her pussy stretching around you, then thick cum pouring back out while she clenches and moans like she can’t decide if she wants more or less. Later there is a spider girl or something like that, I still don’t know what she was exactly because I skipped her talking too fast, but she gave a handjob that went from gentle to full-on abuse in three clicks and I liked it way more than I want to admit. Not all scenes hit the same. Some feel a bit rushed, like the build up is there but then the actual sex is over too quick, and sometimes faces look weird when they’re moaning. Still, the way Henry just walks around this fantasy land and casually fucks anything with fangs, ears or claws like it’s part of the adventure, that part is burned in my brain more than the “save the world” stuff. I opened it “just to check it” on my phone while waiting for a download on Steam and ended up finishing three times before I even remembered what I was supposed to play in the first place.