You know what's weird? I downloaded this thinking it'd be another cheap cash-grab using stolen assets, but honestly... there's something oddly charming about how janky everything feels. Like, you've got Bowsette right next to Tsunade having coffee while Android 18 complains about her hair, and somehow it works? The whole thing runs on Koikatsu cards which means the character models look decent enough, though don't expect AAA polish here.

The dating sim mechanics are pretty straightforward - you pick a girl from this massive roster spanning everything from My Hero Academia to Dragon Ball to fucking Vocaloid characters, then try to sweet-talk your way into their pants. Some conversations feel genuinely funny, especially when the writers clearly had no idea what they were doing with certain franchises. Watching Frieren act like a horny teenager is... an experience. The sex scenes range from vanilla missionary with Princess Peach to some wild tentacle stuff with monster girls, and yeah, there's plenty of titfucking and footjobs if that's your thing. Oral scenes are animated well enough, though the physics can get wonky.

What really got me though was stumbling across this random voyeurism scenario with Komi-san where you're basically just watching through a window, and it felt more intimate than half the actual sex scenes. The game doesn't take itself seriously at all - you'll have Harley Quinn making Batman references during foreplay while Yor Forger somehow ended up in the same room discussing assassination techniques. It's absolutely ridiculous and I kept playing just to see what bizarre crossover would happen next. Sure, the UI looks like it was designed in 2005 and sometimes characters clip through each other during the steamier moments, but there's something endearing about this chaotic mess of anime waifus all existing in the same horny universe.

Game hits you in the face right away with Nel’s tits just kind of… there, wobbling in the dialogue box while she talks about totally normal stuff like “energy extraction” that is obviously just milking your cock. It pretends to be a normal visual novel for maybe two clicks, then the grind loop shows up and suddenly you’re timing clicks and watching a little bar fill up while Rukia moans in that fake “I hate this” voice that sounds more like she’s begging for another round. I tried to play it serious at first, reading the lines, then Orihime pops up with her boobs barely contained and the game basically goes “yeah ok, we all know why you’re here.”

Story is some half-broken parody of Bleach where you’re this random soul reaper dude who somehow has every girl’s attention and everyone is really confused about “spiritual pressure” but what they really mean is cum. You go from area to area, clicking on little icons, collecting points, unlocking scenes like it’s some gacha game where the only SSR is “Yoruichi on all fours with a tail plug.” The best bit is how lazy and honest it feels. Backgrounds are simple, UI feels like it was thrown together during a boring weekend, and then suddenly you hit a full CG where Rangiku’s huge ass is filling the whole screen and the game goes from “haha parody” to “ok I’m jerking to this for real.” I kept alt-tabbing between the game and Discord and somehow lost track of the plot like three times, but it doesn’t even matter, because every choice basically leads to more sucking, riding, or milking anyway.

There is this one tiny, stupid thing I can’t stop thinking about: the way Nel’s boobs squash slightly when she leans on the imaginary table in front of the textbox. They’re huge, obviously, anime giant, but the artist added this tiny fold where they touch, and it broke my brain for a second. Meanwhile Rukia is in the same scene, proportioned totally different, smaller chest but still not exactly “small,” and the script pretends like she’s flat. It’s hilarious. Half the time the dialogue feels like someone was writing while watching clips on another monitor, you get lines like “I’ll never accept this crude training!” and literally one box later she’s riding you, drool on her chin, nipples hard, asking for “more of that spiritual juice.” There’s a grind for “affection” that just means you click the same spot until a meter hits a number, then you get Yoruichi pinning you, purple hair all over the place, tits bouncing as she milks you dry like some smug cat goddess. It’s trashy, inconsistent, kind of buggy, I clicked through one box and skipped a blowjob line that probably was important but whatever, and I still kept going just to see how far they’d push Orihime’s curves before it turned into pure hentai nonsense. Spoiler: it hits that point fast and never looks back.

It’s weird how a game can make you forget what you were actually doing before you clicked it, right? I opened Isekai Brothel thinking it’d be another lazy copy of those generic dating things where everyone stares blankly while you mash through dialogue, but this one… it plays dirtier. Not just in the obvious way (though yeah, there’s plenty of skin and moaning and all that), but in how it messes with your head. You start bouncing between universes like some horny multiverse courier, and suddenly you’re arguing with a half-demon waitress about who’s topping tonight. Then the game throws a slime girl at you, and she calls you “master” like she means it, and I swear I almost dropped my mouse.

The writing is all over the place - half of it’s like someone’s fanfic got drunk and made out with another fanfic, and I kinda love it for that. One scene you’re flirting with a cold swordswoman who barely talks, next thing you’re being pinned by a dragon maid who insists she’s just “checking your health.” Some of the transitions are a mess; one minute it’s sweet, then bam, full-on rough roleplay with no warning. I tried to complain about the pacing, but then a certain pink-haired girl whispered something about “rewarding loyal patrons,” and honestly, whatever I was mad about just evaporated. The voice bits - when they’re there - sound like someone recorded them in a closet, but that weirdly fits the vibe. Like, you’re not supposed to take it too seriously.

There’s a little bug where the bed scene music overlaps with the dialogue if you skip too fast. It drove me nuts, but also, I didn’t stop clicking. Something about collecting girls from different worlds, each with their own twisted little quirks, scratches an itch I didn’t know I had. Half of them act like they hate you, the other half worship you like a god, and both make sense somehow. It’s not classy, not polished, not even pretending to be - but when the screen shakes and she says your name like that, who even cares.

Keigo coming back to town already feels like cheap porn setup, and this game just leans into it without pretending otherwise. You load it up on your phone, see that familiar orange-haired dude with his smug domestic life, and right away you know what lane this goes to. Ichigo has the house, the job, the hot wife with huge tits making small talk in the kitchen, and you are literally the extra guy on the couch. The funny thing is how the game really makes you sit in that loser role. Early on you are just walking around as Keigo, opening menus, checking basic stats, doing small jobs, feeling broke, while Orihime is in the background being sweet and soft and stacked like two watermelons trying to escape her shirt. The animations kick in slowly, not instantly, and that weird delay actually made the first proper lewd scene hit harder than I expected. One moment you are just helping her in the kitchen, next moment your brain is going, "oh fuck, I should not want my friend's wife bent over that table like this," and the game goes, "too late, idiot," and the scene starts flowing.

The corruption vibe is handled more through gradual choices and repeated scenes than any complicated system. You flirt a bit, you stare too long at her ass while she leans forward to clean the table, there is this tiny animated jiggle that honestly got way more of my attention than the big events later. Like, who the hell animates the little side-bounce of her tits when she just turns around to pass you tea? That one stupid motion made me replay the same moment in the gallery more than the full-on sex scenes. And yet, when it actually reaches fucking, they do not hold back. You get the straight vaginal sex with Orihime that starts all guilty and nervous, with her trying to whisper that "Ichigo might come back," then frames cut tighter and tighter until you are literally seeing your dick vanish inside her, white cream pouring out while she shakes. Creampies are not teased, they are just shown full center. Then later, when that line is crossed, she starts dressing differently around you, like the dev is going "ok, she is corrupted now, you broke the dams, go nuts." Not very subtle, but this is porn, not Shakespeare.

What really sells the parody angle for me is how all the other girls show up like some scuffed gacha pool in a bootleg mobile game. You wander a bit more, boom, Rukia in casual clothes acting all strict while your choices push her into compromising situations. Rangiku just appears with this insane stacked chest that looks like the artist was angry at gravity. Yoruichi shows up like a cheat code you accidentally triggered, suddenly naked in catlike poses, animated with this lazy confidence that screams "you are not worthy but I'm bored, so fine." Netorare fans will probably be grinning, because Keigo might be the thief here, but the game never lets you forget that these women are, in some way, attached to Ichigo's orbit. Every time his name drops in the middle of a sex scene, it adds that dirty little stab of "ok, this is fucked," especially when Orihime moans and mentions him while you are the one balls deep. It is messed up, and then five seconds later you are spamming the continue button to see if the next unlock shows more of Rangiku's ass in motion. The 2D animations are not perfect, there are a few loops that look slightly awkward if you stare too long, but then the angle changes and suddenly you are just focused on the way her big ass bounces on Keigo's lap and your inner critic shuts up. I wish the game let you tweak more minor stuff like text speed or let you mute Ichigo's existence for one route, but that is never going to happen and maybe it should not. The whole sick little charm here is that you are the side character stealing the main hero's happy endings, one creampie at a time.