The name already tells you what kind of ride this is, but it still kind of surprised me. You are stuck on this pirate ship with a crew that seems to believe the solution to every problem is “more boobs” and honestly, fair. The whole vibe is horny Saturday-morning-cartoon that grew up wrong, got drunk on a tropical island and started talking about cup sizes instead of treasure. You click through scenes, pick dialog, stuff happens, and suddenly a character who was just nicely stacked before is carrying two ridiculous beach balls on her chest while trying to act like this is totally normal pirate business. Half the fun is watching how the game pretends to take itself seriously as an “adventure” while a girl’s tits are quietly eclipsing the sun in the background. There is a ship, there is an island, there are pirates, but the real plot is watching curves inflate like someone messed up the physics settings and decided to leave it that way.

There is this one scene early on where Captain Ruby is trying to threaten some unlucky fool, and her shirt already looks like it’s about to give up on life. You pick the “cocky” choice, she leans in, the camera angle slides down just a little too slow, and the dialogue keeps talking about loot and honor and whatever, but you can tell the actual story is: which button on that shirt will pop first. I got hung up there, replayed that bit three times on my phone on the bus using Firefox, which was probably a mistake because I kept pretending I was just scrolling Instagram. The expansion itself is treated like both a joke and a fetish at the same time. They play it for laughs with the characters making dumb comments, then they hold a shot on a pair of tits that grew a full extra size just so your brain has time to go “oh, okay, we are doing this now.” There is a transformation moment in a cabin where someone “tests” a potion and the camera cuts back and her boobs are straight up crowding the frame, pressing into the edge like they want their own spin-off game. I loved that bit, and also I hated it because the game never gives you a proper size slider, it just goes from big to utterly stupid with no middle ground. It feels like being in a bar where everyone went from tipsy to blackout with no time in between.

From the ethics side, this thing is funny and also kind of a mess. The characters talk like they are into it most of the time, they flirt, they brag about their new curves, they weaponize their chests like cannons, and the humor leans into “I chose this” which is nice. Then suddenly a scene slips in where a potion is slipped in, or someone wakes up on the island and their body is already changed and they were not exactly asked. The script usually covers it with jokes and horny comments after the fact, like “oh wow I guess this is my life now” and plays it as acceptance, but from consent point of view, that is pretty thin. You can see the game wants the fantasy of surprise transformation and still wants to pretend everyone is totally cool with it, and those two things fight a bit. As a watchdog I’d give it a fake prize: “Most Cheerful Ignoring Of Magical Body Autonomy” and yes, I say that with love, because I still clicked every single suspicious option just to see how far the curves would go. The island setting is a perfect excuse for nonsense potions and cursed treasure, yet sometimes the crew just shrugs and keeps going without a single “hey, maybe ask before you turn my chest into a pair of inflatable rafts.” It does not ruin the horny fun, but it hangs there in the back of your mind while you watch another scene where a character tries to walk across the deck, ass swaying, boobs swaying twice as much, the camera zooming in like a perv that forgot subtlety exists, and you think: ok, this is hot, and it is also absolutely out of control.

Royal Madness is probably the closest thing to a horny fairytale written by a very drunk court painter who really likes cats with huge tits and smug faces. You’re tossed in as Lewis, bastard ocelot prince, and the world instantly treats your royal blood like a kink rather than a title. It’s not subtle about it. Every rival, every “enemy,” every supposed threat ends up circling one question: are you fucking them into your harem, or are they turning you into their cute little pet instead. The game doesn’t pretend to be noble. It treats power as a sex toy and nobility as an excuse to collar people and re-style their bodies until they match your tastes a bit too perfectly.

What I liked is that the characters aren’t just recolors of the same cat-girl with different boobs. The art actually feels like someone sat there and thought “ok, what if a smug lioness warlord had hips like a fertility statue and armor that only makes sense if her nipples are a political statement.” Sometimes it looks messy, lines a bit shaky, anatomy going off on its own adventure, but that fits the energy. It’s not corporate clean, more like horny sketchbook that got out of control. There is this rhino general, for example, huge chest, scars across the muzzle, and when you win their challenge the magic doesn’t just slap “now they are pretty” filter. No, you literally watch the body warp piece by piece, broad muscles smoothing or sharpening, maybe the tits swelling stupidly big while they gasp halfway between outrage and getting turned on by losing. That slow change hits way harder than a simple “transformation finished” screen.

The actual structure is that loose sandbox style where you hop from one hot mess to another, switching perspective between male and female protagonist when the story feels like it, not when you are ready. One scene you’re Lewis using magic to slowly erode the pride of a tiger knight, teasing him until his cock and even his voice betray how much he wants to kneel. Next time the game flips and you’re playing as one of your own ex-rivals, now loyal, wandering your palace and accidentally starting something filthy with a new intruder who thought they’d be the one on top. That shift is the fun part. You see the same harem from different eyes, sometimes as a conqueror, sometimes as the newest toy, sometimes as the one being “improved” by your own magic. And the kinks slide around too. One route gives you a stacked lion queen that you carefully nudge from terrifying monarch into doting, overprotective mommy dom, then another throws you against a seemingly submissive bunny clerk that ends with you collared, hips reshaped, moaning her name while she tests how flexible ocelot royalty can be when properly “reformed.” Half the time I was cursing at the tiny UI buttons and weird pacing, the other half I was staring at the screen of my phone on the tram, trying not to bite my lip like a complete idiot.

If you really want to squeeze every filthy drop out of it, don’t rush straight to the obvious sex scenes. Poke around the challenges, lose on purpose sometimes, see how the transformations twist when you’re the loser instead of the victor. Talk to characters again after you’ve changed them, especially the big tits crowd and the ones who pretended they didn’t care about you. Watch how their new bodies and new roles corrupt their own original goals. Treat each battle less like a level and more like a negotiation with the world’s nastiest fashion designer. That’s where the game actually gets hot.

Mickie starts as that kind of guy you scroll past in a Discord server and forget in two seconds. Plain job, plain apartment, plain everything, like a default avatar with a pulse. Then the game basically grabs him by the balls, laughs a bit, and starts taking them away. The transformation stuff doesn’t slam you all at once, it sneaks in, one little change at a time. First it’s small tweaks in his body that you can just ignore if you pretend hard enough, then curves, then that moment in the mirror where you see a stranger with a soft face and big tits looking back and you realise “oh shit, that’s me.” The game really likes to linger on those transitions: watching his chest swell, hips pushing out, ass filling his underwear while he’s still trying to think in “bro” language. There’s a scene where he’s in bed, just trying to jerk off like usual, and his grip shifts, his breathing changes, fingers trail over his chest instead, and for a second he’s more curious than scared. That little “did I just moan like a girl?” panic hits kind of hard. It feels messy and horny and confusing in a way that’s weirdly honest.

It presents as a dating sim on the surface, but the fun is how much of it is just Mickie trying to renegotiate his own body one touch at a time. You get that slow slide from “what’s happening to me” to “ok but what if I squeeze a bit harder” to “why does my pussy get wet when this person talks nice to me.” The 3D models help a lot here, because the dev really likes big asses and it shows. Every new curve gets its own moment, especially when you end up in cramped spaces with someone who just cannot keep their hands to themselves. There’s teasing everywhere, like the game is edging you on purpose: groping through clothes, someone “helping” her adjust her tight top, awkward kisses that turn into messy oral because neither side wants to stop. One scene in particular stood out to me: Mickie kneeling in front of a love interest, cheeks flushed, clearly still not used to her new mouth and tongue, trying to give oral like she remembers guys doing in porn, then slowly relaxing into it when she realises she actually likes the taste and the control. Later on, when vaginal sex opens up as an option, the first time she feels herself being stretched, there’s this mix of fear, curiosity, and “oh fuck do that again” that pops up in the text. The game doesn’t shy away from masturbation either, and it’s not just one animation loop. It gives you those private moments where she is alone, figuring out what fingers feel best where, rubbing that newly sensitive clit, dripping on the sheets, and getting embarrassed about how loud she was. There are a couple of routes that are kind of awkward and one character who feels like a discount otome love interest imported from another game and shoved in, but honestly, by the time Mickie is grinding in someone’s lap, big tits bouncing, getting groped from behind and gasping like she forgot how to breathe, it’s hard to care. The fantasy setting around it kind of flickers in and out of focus, sometimes it feels like the world exists just to give her more places to get railed, sometimes it suddenly wants you to care about some quest, then it goes back to handjobs under the table like nothing happened. I wish the UI text was less tiny on my phone browser, but that’s apparently my curse with these games, I always end up pinching the screen mid sex scene. Anyway, by the time you realise Mickie isn’t “he” anymore in your head, she’s already there in the story: a fully shaped, horny, confused, very fuckable girl trying to date, tease, and get off in a world that won’t stop touching her.

You start out thinking it’s just another weird sandbox about hypnotizing girls, but the tone hits different. There’s this slow, sticky corruption that creeps in - not all fire and brimstone, more like a soft rot under the skin. The demon Maria doesn’t even feel evil, more like she’s bored and horny, dangling her deal in front of you while you pretend you’re not already imagining what you’ll do with that “Supower.” The city feels alive in that fake kind of way, like a porn set pretending to be a neighborhood, and somehow that makes it hotter. You walk into the school, or the cheap apartment, or the nun’s little chapel, and everything hums with that dirty energy of something forbidden but inevitable.

It’s a game that rewards patience - though I don’t mean gameplay-wise. The real fun is watching how the women change. Their eyes go from defiant to glassy, their voices soften when they say your name. One moment they’re scolding you for being a creep, next they’re begging to taste you, moaning like they forgot who they were before you touched them. It’s not subtle, and thank god for that. There’s NTR bits that sting if you’re too attached, but also moments where you realize you’ve become the bastard doing the same thing. The MILF’s story goes places I didn’t expect - one second she’s the responsible type, then she’s on her knees, tits bouncing, drool dripping down her chin while you tell her she’s nothing but your pet. And yeah, it’s animated, but the roughness of it almost adds charm. Like watching an old fan animation that accidentally nails the filthiness better than polished stuff ever could.

Sometimes I forget what the “main quest” even is. I just end up chasing scenes - the footjob behind the school, the nun whispering prayers while you fill her mouth, the monster girl moaning through transformation. It’s chaotic, half-finished, but I keep coming back. Maybe because it feels like a modder’s dream: imperfect, dirty, and personal. Like someone’s fantasy spilled straight onto the screen without cleanup.