Man, this MHA dating sim is like finding a twenty dollar bill in your old jeans pocket - unexpectedly good but kinda wrinkled around the edges. The Koikatsu engine does most of the heavy lifting here, and honestly? It works better than it has any right to. You're basically living out every weeb's fantasy of hooking up with the Class 1-A girls, plus some pro heroes who definitely shouldn't be giving you the time of day but here we are.

The character roster is honestly impressive - we got Ochako being all cute and bubbly, Momo with that rich girl energy that somehow makes the paizuri scenes hit different, and don't even get me started on Mirko because that rabbit hero will absolutely wreck you in the best possible way. Mt Lady's scenes are chef's kiss, especially when she's in that cheerleader outfit that makes zero sense contextually but who cares. The dialogue tries to stay true to the characters which is... ambitious, I'll give them that. Sometimes Tsuyu sounds exactly like herself, other times she's spouting lines that would make Mineta blush. It's inconsistent but when it works, it really works.

Look, the gameplay loop is pretty standard dating sim stuff - talk to girls, pick dialogue options, unlock increasingly spicy scenes. Nothing groundbreaking there. But the variety of positions and scenarios keeps things interesting. The footjob scene with Jiro had me questioning my life choices in the best way, and the lesbian content with Toga and Uraraka is surprisingly well animated. Sure, some of the English translation reads like it went through Google Translate twice, and occasionally the girls' personalities do complete 180s between scenes, but when you're balls deep in a threesome with Mina and Hagakure (invisible girl jokes write themselves), you're not exactly critiquing the narrative consistency. The visual novel elements feel tacked on but whatever, we're not here for Shakespeare.

You know that feeling when a game looks like it was thrown together in someone’s horny fever dream, but somehow it still works on you way harder than the “polished” stuff? This one is exactly that, like an accidental ASMR session where the mic is clipping a bit and you hear the creator breathing too close, yet your brain goes, yeah, keep going. It’s a Ren’Py visual novel that dumps you into an isekai version of Attack on Titan, only instead of getting eaten by giants, you basically get eaten alive by the girls. The whole cast is here in their Koikatsu-style 3D look, slightly uncanny and shiny in all the wrong places, but that actually helps the vibe. They feel like adult dolls someone posed for you, not perfect anime waifus, and that’s kinda hot in a trashy way. First scene I got, I ended up alone with Mikasa in a quiet barracks room, and the sound of the little ambient loop in the background plus those slow text lines dripping in felt almost like whispering in your ear. It’s not amazing sound design or anything, just basic loops and light clicks, but if you’re into ASMR, that soft repetitive tap of Ren’Py text advance starts to feel like a metronome for your horny brain.

The game leans very hard into the male protagonist fantasy, no pretending it’s anything else. You’re the guy, you’re dropped into their world, and pretty fast it turns into harem territory with Sasha, Annie, Historia, Hange, and Zoe orbiting around your dick like it’s the new Wall Maria. First time Sasha drops to her knees and starts an eager blowjob, the camera angle is slightly weird, like her face is too close and the background is dead empty, but you can hear the faint menu click you made just before the scene and it accidentally amps the tension. Then later there’s a titjob scene with Mikasa where nothing really moves except her model shifting position and the text describing her squeezing you between her breasts, and the stillness makes you focus on every little line. It’s like reading smut while someone plays a low YouTube rain sound in another tab. Then the next moment the game swings to Historia giving a shy handjob, her eyes not quite tracking right because of the model, and that tiny jank suddenly feels intimate, like you caught a bootleg recording. There’s a footjob with Annie that goes on way too long text-wise, and I kind of hated it and loved it. The dev really milks every toe curl and heel press on your shaft, to the point where you’re clicking, clicking, clicking, thinking, ok I get it, she’s rubbing, and then one line hits you: “You can feel her sole slide slowly along your vein,” and your whole body reacts. Then you go right back to being annoyed that the textbox covers the best part of the screen and you can’t move it. Classic Ren’Py pain.

Romance here is not subtle, but it tries. There are choice branches where you can act more caring with Historia or tease Sasha or be weirdly gentle with Hange, and those tiny variations actually shift the energy of later scenes. One time I picked the softer answer with Historia early on, and her later blowjob had different lines, more about “wanting to take care of you,” and the way it was written had this soft ASMR energy, like verbal aftercare while she’s still sucking. Then I restarted and went full asshole route and she was colder, more detached, same animation, completely different feeling. The game plays like a first date where you know you’re going to fuck, but you’re still pretending there’s some sweetness involved. Then after a couple routes, it starts feeling like a long term thing with these girls, where you know exactly how Sasha moans when she goes too deep, or how Mikasa’s “hnn” lines always appear right before she speeds up. You kind of memorize the rhythm of their scenes. There’s romance, sure, but it’s romance written by someone who clearly loves the characters and also wants to see them swallow. The UI is clunky, some backgrounds feel like random Koikatsu screenshots, and sometimes the pacing just dies in the middle of a hot scene, but when the text, the slow click, the janky 3D pose and your own breathing sync up for a second, it hits like low budget porn that somehow turns into a brain massage. It should not work as well as it does. It really, really should not.

You boot this thing up in Chrome like a degenerate scholar and it just throws you right into the mess: Sunny’s fucked, Whole Cake is a disaster, and Nami is literally floating around like premium hentai bait in the middle of the sea. No long-ass intro, no 10 walls of lore, just “hey, you’re a random dude with a ship and a dick, there’s a half-naked orange-haired navigator somewhere out there, go fix it or ruin it, whatever.” You play as this new captain who’s clearly not Luffy but also kind of acts like Luffy if Luffy liked tits more than meat. Every time the game gives you a choice you can be a decent guy like “yeah, let’s help her” or turn into peak porn logic and go “actually I will just stare at her wet nipples for another minute, thanks.” The whole vibe is like someone smashed horny fanfic into a lowkey pirate management game and then forgot to optimize anything, and honestly that chaos fits it too well.

The voyeur stuff is where it accidentally hits god-tier horny. There’s this early scene where you find Nami passed out on a scrap of wood, clothes all torn from the storm, ass perfectly framed like the ocean is simping for her. Instead of just doing normal rescue like a sane human, the game straight up lets you do this slow camera creep around her body while your guy monologues in his head about how “I should probably check if she is hurt” while very clearly inspecting only her tits and thighs. It’s fucked, it’s funny, it’s hot, and it’s also kind of trash, which is exactly why I kept going. Later on, when she’s actually on your ship, there’s this part where she’s trying to dry her clothes and the dev clearly just went “okay, physics go brrrrr” because her boobs are jiggling from the wind like the weather itself is down bad. Meanwhile you’re fake-managing a crew, pretending to be this big brave future Pirate King, but every night you’re sneaking to the deck to spy on Nami bending over barrels or washing herself with a bucket, thinking you’re subtle while the camera is loud as fuck about it. At one point she’s looking out at the horizon, skirt just barely riding up, and you get a choice between talking about navigation or just silently ogling her ass like some Pornhub side character. I picked the horny option of course, and she kinda notices but pretends not to, which somehow made it hotter and also more cursed. The game is janky, the pacing is all over the place, sometimes dialogue sounds like it was translated by Google on a hangover, but when the scene hits, it really hits: big ass framed in moonlight, wet shirt glued to big boobs, and you, the clown captain, trying to decide if you’re a hero, a perv, or both at the same time.

Your grandparents vanish off the face of the earth, everyone acts like they’re dead, and the whole town just kind of… moves on. Years later you roll back in, phone in your pocket, brain full of horny thoughts you really shouldn’t have while asking people about missing old folks. It starts quiet. A simple mobile-style interface, tapping around like you’re just checking Instagram, but each location you poke has a little secret. A window left half open. A shower running too long. A MILF neighbor “too friendly” who somehow knows way more about your grandparents than she should, but instead you’re watching her bend over, thinking with your dick and not your head. Classic.

It tries to be a mystery first, and somehow still rubs your face in sex every few minutes. You follow clues like a point and click, only instead of boring keys and doors, you catch a girl masturbating with a toy on her couch because you checked the wrong camera at the right time. Or the right camera at the wrong time, depends how moral you are, I guess. There’s this voyeur vibe everywhere: security feeds in weird places, people who “didn’t know the camera is on,” and you, the good little detective, totally not replaying the clip three times before interrogating her about where she was the night your grandparents disappeared. The game teases you constantly. Women strip to distract you mid-dialogue, big tits pushed in your face while you’re trying to remember who lied about the last time they saw grandma. You tell yourself you’re focused on the case, but the next scene is you balls deep, creampie, and then going “oh shit, what was I doing again.”

What really messed with me is that there are superpower bits thrown into this small-town detective story like it’s normal. Suddenly you’re reading micro-expressions, nudging minds, or freezing time long enough to enjoy an “accidental” upskirt that lasts way too long to be accidental. It’s half sci-fi, half horny soap opera. The pacing is kinda weird sometimes, you’ll be in a really tender romance moment with a shy girl finally taking off her clothes slow, proper teasing, then the next tap dumps you in some sandbox area where a dominant older woman drags you around by the balls and talks like she owns the whole town. And you let her. Of course you let her. There’s one scene where a so-called respectable “auntie” type corners you during an “investigation,” pushes you into a chair, rides you until you’re shaking, then tells you important story info while you’re still buried inside her. That mix of information and sex is absolutely stupid and also exactly what my brain wanted. Animation helps a lot, nothing crazy, but enough bounce and wetness that when a big ass grinds on you, it actually feels like something. The game jokes about itself too, throwing in weird humor about old people, porn logic, and how no one ever calls the police, like it knows exactly what kind of trash it is. And yeah, sometimes the dialogue hits like a bad meme from 2014, yet I kept tapping, waiting for the next time a “serious interview” turned into you on your back, MILF on top, mystery temporarily forgotten under her.