Frank's prison break goes about as well as you'd expect - which is to say, absolutely terrible. One shipwreck later and this guy's washing up in Bikini Bottom looking like he got chewed up by Davy Jones himself. But here's where things get weird (and I mean WEIRD): instead of doing the sensible thing like finding help or maybe not impersonating cartoon characters, Frank decides the best survival strategy is pretending to be SpongeBob. Yeah, that SpongeBob. The yellow square dude who flips patties and annoys his neighbors.

What starts as a desperate con job turns into something way more fucked up than you bargained for. Frank's not just wearing the square pants - he's living the whole twisted fantasy, and apparently everyone in Bikini Bottom is way more... accommodating than the original show ever suggested. Sandy's got that Texas-sized appetite for more than just science experiments, if you catch my drift. The animation work is surprisingly smooth for what's basically underwater cartoon porn, though sometimes the character expressions look like they're having existential crises mid-scene. Can't blame them honestly. The sandbox elements let you wander around causing chaos at your own pace, which is perfect because rushing through this fever dream would be doing it a disservice. You'll find yourself clicking through dialogue just to see how much more absurd Frank's situation can get, and trust me, it gets pretty damn absurd.

The whole thing feels like someone took childhood nostalgia, threw it in a blender with adult fantasies, and hit the "completely unhinged" setting. Frank's supposed to be this hardened criminal but half the time he's bumbling around like he's never seen a talking starfish before. The male domination stuff works better than it should given the source material, probably because everyone's so committed to the bit. It's crude, it's ridiculous, and somehow that makes the sexy parts hit different. Just don't expect any deep character development - Frank's basically a horny plot device with commitment issues.

Dirty Fantasy feels like someone took your Pornhub search history, your old Witcher saves and half of r/LeagueNSFW, threw them in a blender and said “yeah, fuck it, that’s the story now”. You play as this very self-aware male protagonist who is clearly written by someone that thinks he’s a macho god, but somehow it kind of works. One moment you’re chatting with Ciri like you’re on Telegram trying not to sound horny, next moment you’re accidentally agreeing to a threesome with Jinx and Vi and realizing you absolutely clicked through that dialogue too fast. It has this weird energy where all the girls already look at you like they’ve read your browser history and decided they’re cool with it. The world hops from Witcher-style tavern vibes to Piltover streets to some creepy tentacle dungeon that feels like somebody spent too much time on certain Doujinshi apps, but it never takes itself serious, and that’s the charm. You just bounce around, flirt, screw up, then screw, in that order or not, depending how drunk you click.

Sex scenes are the real meat here, shocker. It goes all in: vaginal, anal, oral, titfucks, toys, proper dripping creampies, soft stuff, rough stuff, and of course tentacles that show up exactly when you think “they wouldn’t actually do tentacles, right?” Ahri doing slow, teasing oral like she knows she’s the main event, Caitlyn trying to stay all proper while you rail her from behind, Katarina acting like she’s in charge right until she’s on her knees, Ciri climbing on top like this is some weird crossover mod you forgot you installed. Some scenes are straight-up group chaos, like when Jinx brings “friends” and suddenly you’re in full orgy territory, bodies everywhere, cumshots stacked on top of each other, that kind of animated loop you end up watching three times because you keep catching some new detail in the background. Animations are not perfect, sometimes a hip moves weird or a hand clips somewhere it shouldn’t, but honestly, with a dick in a mouth and a tentacle in places you’re not proud to admit you like, who’s counting pixels. The one thing that annoyed me for real is how long it sometimes takes to actually get to the next sex scene, like you’re stuck in a tease loop while the story pretends it matters. But then Ahri bites her lip, or Vi pins you to the wall, or Ciri asks if you can “go again” and suddenly you forget you were mad at all. It’s messy, horny, a bit trashy, sometimes funny on purpose, sometimes funny by accident, and feels exactly like opening three incognito tabs at once and letting them bleed into each other until it’s just you, a bunch of big tits from different universes, and zero regrets.

This one feels like when you open some “serious dark fantasy” game and then five minutes later you’re already horny and slightly ashamed of yourself. World is all holy banners, burned-out elves, humans acting like they’re the main character of the universe, big church, big lies, big tits. You crawl up from this underground life with daddy’s weird letter in your hand, expecting some standard inheritance drama, and instead you crash straight into a mess of hungry women, twisted faith and way too many chances to get your dick in trouble. The whole thing plays like a sandbox confession booth where every “amen” is followed by someone on their knees for a completely different reason.

What I like is how it pretends to be all story-first, serious business, and then the game just keeps finding excuses to put soft bodies right in your face. Older women with that tired saint smile who drop it the moment you touch their thigh, smug church girls who look pure until they’re wrapping their lips around you, guards’ wives who are sooo loyal until you catch them alone and start groping them from behind. There’s this one scene in a cramped side street near the Holy Capital walls where a mature nun pushes you against a wall and mutters something about “testing your purity,” then drops to her knees and gives you the sloppiest oral, drool everywhere, and the camera angle is tight on her cheeks bouncing as she goes faster. I actually paused Netflix on my second monitor because it was distracting from her sucking you off. That kind of night.

Sex here is not gentle. Like, yeah, you can tease, there’s slow foreplay, some voyeur moments where you hide in the shadows and watch two “holy” women comforting each other a little too much while you stroke yourself, but when you finally take one of them, the game wants you to really pound. Big asses that ripple when you hit from behind, tits pushed together for a sticky titjob, creampies that stay there and stare at you. One of the best bits for me was a roleplay scene where a high-ranking woman pretends to be your prisoner from the old elf war, begs for mercy, and then begs for your cock. It’s so wrong in lore terms and somehow that makes it hotter. The harem angle sort of creeps up naturally: you come “home,” every woman you meet has some secret tension with you, and next thing you know you’ve got a jealous mature lady riding you in your childhood room while another girl watches from the door, touching herself and pretending she’s not. All this on top of a dark story about faith, violence, cheating, and a hero who solves family mysteries with his dick almost as much as with his brain. Honestly, it shouldn’t work. It absolutely does.

City of Broken Heroes feels like somebody took a Marvel movie, made the guys squishy and weak, then said “ok, but what if every woman was horny, pissed off, and had zero HR department.” It starts almost normal: you land in this neon freakshow of a city, confused, dick out, no clue how anything works. Then a seven foot tall “hero” in latex and armor collar-checks you with one hand and you realize: alright, I’m a chew toy here. The whole thing is this mix of sci-fi and magic and bdsm where you’re officially a slave, unofficially the pervy glitch in the system who doesn’t stay in his cage.

What I like is how the game makes you feel fragile and dangerous at the same time. Men are biologically weaker, so yeah, women toss you around, sit on your face like it’s a chair, use you as a dildo tester, all that. But once you start picking up these illegal powers and gear, you kind of become the city’s worst customer service complaint. One night I was sneaking through an alley to spy on one of the heroines, got caught by her twin bodyguards, and instead of a normal fight it turned into this “punishment session” where they test different toys on you between turn based combat rounds. You win the round, you get a chance to flip the table and fuck them against the wall. You lose, they edge you with handjobs and oral until you’re begging and they just laugh and walk away. I hated it. I replayed it three times.

The sex itself is very explicit, but it always feels tied to the power imbalance and not just random porn spam. One “training” scene has an older heroine, proper milf energy, using you like a stress ball while she reads reports. She sits in her huge chair, pulls your head between her tits, strokes you with lazy fingers, then without even looking at you tells another girl “see, this is why you keep men on a short leash.” Later, when you finally get strong enough, you crash her raid, blast her shields in combat, and the rematch is you pinning her, fucking that big ass into the desk while she swears she’ll collar you again. She won’t. She totally will, the game loves to remind you who runs things here. Half the fun is that whiplash: one scene you dominate a squad of monster girls, filling them one by one, creampies dripping while they worship your “hidden potential.” Next scene, a different heroine throws you on the floor, sits on your cock, rides you raw, creampie, then snaps a pic for blackmail and makes you clean her boots with your tongue. And you keep going back to that part of town anyway. That’s the vibe.